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How would you address this?

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by annsni, Sep 20, 2009.

  1. annsni

    annsni Well-Known Member
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    There is a woman who has been attending our church for a short time (not sure how long but I've just recently noticed her) who does something during worship that I find REALLY distracting to myself - and most likely it is so for those who sit behind her. We have two sections in the church sanctuary front to back (there are like 10 rows of chairs, then a gap then 10 more rows of chairs - the gap being an aisle that you use to go across the sanctuary) and she makes sure she sits in the front row of the second section so she has room to move. So there's her positioning.

    During worship, she tends to fling her arms wildly all about her - so much so that she has to move into the aisle in front of her so that she doesn't hit anyone (I've actually been cringing waiting for her to smack her husband in the head or something). The least of it is similar to when your hands go to sleep and you shake your arms to flap your hands around so you can get the feeling back. She does this above her head over and over again. In the most extreme case, she swings her arms around her head in a circle around and around and around, then flings them straight up, then shakes her hands like I described above. She does this all through worship. Now, we're a church that raises hands but this is very extreme for us.

    My husband told me that he believes that she had attended our church in the past and when someone spoke to her, she said it was out of her control and it was the Holy Spirit doing this in her and she wasn't planning to stop.

    So, how would you address this - if you would address it?? I find I need to just watch the computer screen during worship (I run the computer that shows the words up on the screen) because I get so distracted by her flinging her arms around that I forget where we are and miss the cue to change the slide. I'm sure others have the same issue. It's not a subtle thing but VERY obvious. SHOULD it even be addressed? Oh, and I've not spoken to our senior pastor about it - just my husband, so I'm not sure if someone is going to/has spoken to her again. I was just thinking about it today and figured I'd ask what you guys think.
     
  2. Winman

    Winman Active Member

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    Wow, this one gave me a chuckle :laugh:

    Sorry, I know you are being totally serious here. I used to work with a fellow years ago who had some very strange behaviour. He would pull his shirt up exposing his stomach and then rub it. He would also rub his hands together like he was washing his hands very often. Very wierd (plus, he had a very large stomach which wasn't very attractive). I asked some co-workers about it and they said he had Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. When I first read your account I was thinking that this lady has this problem. But if she claims it is the Holy Spirit causing this, then she seems completely aware of the problem and should be able to control it.

    I dunno, I guess I would speak to her and tell her nicely that she is distracting everyone from the message, and if she must do this to please sit in the last pew where no one would see it.
     
  3. rdwhite

    rdwhite New Member

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    That is a problem. She is a distraction and she is causing problems. But of course since she can claim she is doing so by the Holy Spirit, she will be indignant when she is questioned. If she is not dealt it will lead to other problems. I would confront that spirit for it is a wicked one.
     
  4. Graybeard

    Graybeard New Member

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    If there's a spirit leading her it may not be the holy one if she's such a distraction.
     
  5. blackbird

    blackbird Active Member

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    Its not uncommon for some folks to have what is called "Nervous Tics"---a mild disorder where they feel they MUST do something---I don't know--its hard to describe--but different folks have different tics---some more severe than others and some with mild cases

    Thats what it sounds like to me

    There is also the possiblity of her having what is called "Rhett's Syndrome"---check for spelling here as I spelled it how it sounds
     
    #5 blackbird, Sep 20, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 20, 2009
  6. annsni

    annsni Well-Known Member
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    That's what I'm thinking.

    I guess on that note, would the Spirit lead someone to do something so out of control?? To me, it reminds me of severe Tourettes.

    Think of this guy :wavey: swinging his arm around and around his head as if he were swinging a string with a ball at the end or a lasso. That's the move I worry she's going to hurt someone.

    The other is severe flailing of the arms above her head like she has spiders on them and she's trying to get them off.
     
  7. annsni

    annsni Well-Known Member
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    I've seen ticks - I don't think that's what this is.
     
  8. preachinjesus

    preachinjesus Well-Known Member
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    We had to address something like this before. At first we tried to ignore it but the distraction became so obvious something had to be said.

    Finally, our Senior Pastor went and talked with the family and let them know that while we did not want to diminish their worship that it was our tradition to be a bit, um, less boisterous in our expression. He basically said that while we validated different expressions of worship that as a leadership team we wanted to create an environment that was welcoming for all people. Then he talked with them plainly about our position on the miraclous gifts and ecstatic utterances (which was an issue.) The he outlined the steps for church discipline, he did it very graciously and with a compassionate heart.

    The family ended up leaving and going to a charismatic church that our Senior Pastor recommended.

    We had to address it, the issue was getting out of hand and was very distracting for our worship experience. It ended up being an issue of corporate unity over everything else. :)
     
  9. annsni

    annsni Well-Known Member
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    Thank you for sharing that with me. It's helpful to see how other churches deal with it and I think your pastor dealt with it in a very Biblical, caring way.
     
  10. Allan

    Allan Active Member

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    I think this is your issue.
    And if the above is the issue then she indeed has a strong charismatic view here. I agree that if it is not dealt with then you will not only continue with the distractions but more situations will follow as she becomes more involved in your church. That is not necessarily a bad thing (getting involved) but if she isn't addressed and the stand the church takes with respect to it's view on certian issues, them more will come.

    I agree with preachinJesus in what was done, as this something I have had to do as well. our issue was not so much because of distractions but because this individual was speaking to people about the "Word of Faith" belief. Even though many of the few she spoke with didn't agree, and she was very polite about it, it had to be addressed because it was causing confusion for some of the others. But like preachinJesus incident she to, after meeting with her, left eventually as well. Actaully she told me later it had been her intent to help the church become more spiritual (charismatic) and not so much 'biblical' (baptist) - those where her words :).

    Now I know of another situation of a pastor friend of mine in which the situation went an entirely different direction and the lady stayed and was a great blessing to the church.
     
  11. Alive in Christ

    Alive in Christ New Member

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    Just leave her alone, and let her do it. Shes a christian, and shes worshipping her Lord as she desires.

    Its a personal thing between her and her Lord.

    It should be a non-issue. We have a couple of people in my church (Baptist) who sometimes raise their hands during worship. Most dont, but they do.

    Its not a big deal and nobody is bothered by it at all.
     
  12. rdwhite

    rdwhite New Member

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    This is not an issue of raising hands, in a controlled manner. This is an issue of wildly and uncontrollably flailing her arms, making a scene, and causing a distraction. It is not a personally thing, it is a look at me thing. It is an unclean and blasphemous spirit and will attract more of the same.
     
  13. Alive in Christ

    Alive in Christ New Member

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    Brother RD...

    And you are able to discern the thoughts and motivations of her heart....how?
     
  14. Revmitchell

    Revmitchell Well-Known Member
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    False and exaggerated actions in the worship service do not need to be tolerated. The service and all its conduct needs to be done in Spirit and Truth (John 4:24). Satan can use pretenses for worship to disrupt the service as well as he can anything else.
     
  15. Crabtownboy

    Crabtownboy Well-Known Member
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    My first thought was this may be a result of some type of medical condition. I have never heard of a "swinging arm syndrome" but it may exist. Does she swing her arms when not in a worship service? Also it may be some type of mental condition that causes her to do this.
     
  16. annsni

    annsni Well-Known Member
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    See, it's certainly not just raising hands. Many of our congregation do that and it's fine but this is wild flailing. Think of a toddler in a total meltdown swinging his arms. If you came close to this woman, she could easily break your nose if she hit you in the face, it's that severe. She has to move out of her seat area two steps up in order to avoid hitting anyone.
     
  17. annsni

    annsni Well-Known Member
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    Honestly, I've not seen her outside of the service. My only exposure to her is in the service so I don't know if she does this other times.
     
  18. Johnv

    Johnv New Member

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    In every dozen eggs, there's bound to be one that's got a wierd shape. This sounds like you've got an egg that's shaped wierd. If this is a matter of it only being "visually" disuptive for others, I'd do nothing.

    We've got a young girl (19) who likes to move her arms in ballet-type dance moves during certian hymns. It's a little wierd looking, but hey, as long as she's not smacking anyone, there' no reasn not to let he be.
     
  19. FlyForFun

    FlyForFun New Member

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  20. Tom Bryant

    Tom Bryant Well-Known Member

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    I would speak to her. It must not be totally out of her control because she sits where she can move without hitting anyone, so she knows it is going to happen. It doesn't just happen once in a while. If she left for a period of time, why did she come back?

    It may also mean you have to change where you sit so you can't see her or be disturbed by her. You're probably not the only one who it bothers, but you have to find some way so that you can worship without you being disturbed in your spirit.
     
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