Parenting advice, please

Raised six here and now have four grandkids around quite often. You ought to hear it now when the whole family plus friends are here in our little house.

I hate to be discouraging, but I think the best you can hope for is to eliminate any inappropriate talk and rudeness, teach them to let someone else talk when there is a 'real' conversation going on and work on volume levels.

How old is this crew?

 

Hehe, you're funny. I got a few chuckles reading your post.

Well, my wife's parents and my parents were, and raised us both accordingly, and although we allowed our kids to express themselves much more than we were allowed to growing up, believe me, our younguns knew when it was time to shut up.

Just curious, do they manage to sit quietly through the church service? (whew, do I ever remember 'the pinch', from my mother, if we were being rowdy in church; all one did after receiving 'the pinch' was sit quietly and rub the sore spot for the remainder of the service)

Heheh, maybe you should move it up to 6.........(just kidding)

 

If you can talk while you work and still get your job done--there's nothing wrong with talking

Good example of "talking"-------I'm a WW2 hobbiest--nothing professional--but do read and put things together

During the war--both sides(American & German) monitored each others radio signals--the Germans noticed that the Americans maintained constant "chatter" over the radio---nothing that had to do with the war---mostly "chatter" about HOME---the Americans let each other know they were there and listening and talking---they talked over the radio in Europe as if they were in their Living rooms or on the play ground!!!

The German radios on the other hand--remained silent--except for what came over in the form of orders--etc---no friendly "chit-chat"--no "chatter"---nobody talked to each other--no one knew what was going on outside of their area

My advise?? Let um "chatter"--they're getting their work done--and developing social skills at the same time!!

 

Best parenting advice I've heard:

As soon as you can put your child in a large barrell and tightly secure the lid.
Drill a hole in it for air and nurishment.

When the kids reach their teens, close the hole.

Rob

 

Heheh, if they sit fine in church that means they can do it. And, they know WHEN to be quiet. Very good.


......have you ever considered getting some good quality ear plugs?...........

 

Earplugs.






:laugh:

 

Thanks for sharing that! I enjoy learning such things!

 

Growing up I remember a neighbor family where talking at the table and a noisy indoors was not allowed. Today I probably keep in touch with a couple of them more than they do their own siblings and I they know that they go months if not years before they talk to all their siblings.

It was quite the opposite in my house and rarely a day goes by where I do not talk to at least my brother or sister and it would be rare that a week goes by that I do not talk to brother and sister at least 3 times. I raised my boys the same way, their mother and I were more concerned with content than the quiet.

Sounds to me that you are raising a loving family and this will pay dividends now and when they are adults. You can always institute an occasional quiet game, where the winner/winners win something. Other than that, I would just thank GOD you have children who like each other and prove it.

 

I agree. The day will come when you will miss that chatter. Five of us are gone and the 6th spends weekends at his brother's house. It is nice in a way, but can be sad as well.

At the moment my oldest and his family are staying with us waiting for a house to open in out town. It has been nice to have a buzz back again.

Talking could be fighting.

 

Use earplugs. You'll be amazed at what you still hear through them.... but noise is reduced.

Teach them the game of pass the batton: Use it at the table to control noise. It works like this; The one who fist holds up his hand gets the batton. He can only speak while in possession of the batton. He then passes it to the one who he was addressing OR the next person who holds up their hand. Points can be given for speaking without first waiting for possession of the batton, and that person must wait their turn. A person is not allowed to hog the batton..... or to speak more than (here you make the rule as to how many times before the baton is offered to those who have not taken a turn.) Parents are the only ones allowed to speak at any time.... but can play also if they wish to. At the end of the meal those with the least points can get a reward, like skipping an assigned task or their choice of movie or t.v. program..... OR the one with the most points can be assigned a task which is less pleasant. For the little ones.... a handicap advantage may be given until they develop the discipline to speak only when in possession of the batan or raise their hand to get it. The batton is any object which will not be confused as eidible, or a tool to be eaten with. A paper weight works nicely and can remain on the table til next meal.

Sometimes, playing some relaxing music and turning off t.v. and radio can encourage quiet. As children working chores... my sisters and I would start singing... the old hymns worked nicely for us.... and we'd break into harmony. I'm sure this was more pleasing to mom instead of hearing lots of chatter.

Family gatherings are a noisy problem for me as I've lived alone most of my life and am unaccustomed to playing radio or t.v. every waking hour unlike many I know. Sometime on these occassions, I just rest back and take a deep breath..... several if needed to relax myself..... and just listen. It is a reward to my ears to hear the happy expressions of life, interest, and love between others.

God bless.

 

A whip and a chair might help with those table manners!

 

....honey, you're gonna have to get over that; you're the adult here, you're the boss; I doubt there's anything you're going to do to keep them, especially as teenagers, from viewing you as nagging at times. Have you ever put the FEAR in them? (heheh)

 

It's a symphony of life. Relax and enjoy!:love2: