The importance of words

If we concentrated on our own short comings in our spiritual lives, we would see less of those of others.

It is far better to be of a positive spirit as we grow together in Christ. We ought to walk in another's shoes for a season and understand why they do what they do. We can then find a positive way to lead them, rather that trying to drive them in yet another wrong direction.

Cheers,

Jim

 

Judge Gently

Pray, don't find fault with the man that limps
Or stumbles along the road.
Unless you have worn the shoes he wears
Or struggled beneath his load.

There may be tacks in his shoes that hurt
Though hidden away from view.
Or the burden he bears placed on your back
Might cause you to stumble too.

Don't sneer at the man who's down today
Unless you have felt the blow
That caused his fall or felt the shame
That only the fallen know.

You may be strong but still the blows
That was his if dealt to you
In the selfsame way, at the selfsame time
Might cause you to stagger too.

Don't be too harsh with the man that sins
Or pelt him with word or stone
Unless you are sure - yea, doubly sure -
That you have no sins of your own.

For you know, perhaps,
If the tempter's voice should whisper as soft to you
As it did to him when he went astray
It might cause you to falter too.

--Author Unknown





Romans 2:1, Therefore you have no excuse, everyone of you who passes judgment, for in that which you judge another, you condemn yourself; for you who judge practice the same things.

 

It takes time for others to recognize and accept new changes in you. If you join with her in saying something like, “How can that be a Christian attitude?” are you not basically joining in with her in something you take offense at while doing the same thing back to her? I suggest returning love in grace and this will set a better example.

(Gal 5:22) But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
(Gal 5:23) Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.

While doing this, being able to quote a few relevant Bible verses for her might open her eyes to the changes. When I was new in my walk, as I read along in the Bible I began to write down verses, which to this day I am still amazed how I was lead to just the right verses, on 3x5 cards for memorizing (this turned into 100 verses before I knew it) . A few things that came through that experience was: 1) my tool box got bigger 2) I learned how to use those tools 3) you’d be surprised how impressed :saint: …and/or intimidated :laugh: … some of these “long time church goers” are when they witness you quoting scripture. :smilewinkgrin:

 

I've never had a relative like that, but I can imagine how I would react. I'd be hurt, and would be tempted to tell her, Auntie, I forgive you for being an obnoxious witch.

Can your parents run interference for you? Is she a sister to your mother or dad? Maybe the sibling can get in her face on your behalf.

 

Sometimes you just have to tell people how it is. Tell her if she doesn't get off your back you'll not meet again until the funeral.

 

Andy_S,

I'm curious.....how is it that you have to be anywhere near her? Do you live with her? Is she paying for your college or something?

DON'T be a doormat! Stand up for yourself. You don't need to keep taking the abuse!

Next time she pops off and says something mean to you in front of everyone, you are well within your rights to say (in a nice way) "Aunt ______, how would you like it if I constantly brought up YOUR failures and faults in front of everyone? Your 'advice' is not appreciated, nor will it be tolerated anymore. I'm certain God did not put you on this Earth to trash me in front of everyone. So next time you feel the need to insult me, save it."

Or something to that effect. You don't have to be profane or hateful, but you need to stand up to her. Which makes me wonder about the rest of your family. I mean, if my sister repeatedly insulted my son, I'd show her THE BUSINESS END of a baseball bat.

 

Soul suckers. That's what I feel happens when people act that way. Knew someone like that before and it's not being blunt, it's usually cruel because they assume they know the emotions and motives behind who you are and what you do and they mask their cruelty behind the name of Christian.

Uh uh. However, continuing to deal with it is your choice. You don't have to. I find nothing wrong with maintaining a good distance from soul suckers. They can choose to continue and lose the relationship or choose to change. It's rare for change to happen though, once they have convinced themselves that their cruelty is righteousness.

 

...some people are just jerks.

The one(s) with all the advise and willing to share it at all costs are often the ones who feel really insecure to begin with.

 

Not knowing you age, I may be taking the wrong approach, but it looks from here that this is "puppy Love", and if it is it will not be long until that passing fancy will be history, and you will see perhaps your Aunt is right.

I could be completely wrong having no more facts. In any case "buck up", live it up and bet there is someone just waiting for you to show up, or you and your girl may makeup.

 

How true Andy. That's why I prefaced my input with "not knowing", possible wrong approach, and stating "I could be completely wrong having no more facts". The only fact you have presented that has caused your discontent with your Aunt is the break-up with your girlfriend.

Hope you find peach in this matter.

 

I feel for you hun.
My mother is quite similar to your aunt, however she is not christian and points out ever flaw and mistake that anyone in our family who is christian makes. Her favorite like is "wow, and you call yourself a christian" or "how christian of you"... Learn to take it as a grain of salt (easier said than done right? lol...it takes some practice)... also note, in my experience (with my mom and others i've encountered like her).. they are usually bitter, hurting, unhappy, etc inside..so they need to make others feel as low inside as they do.. my pastor has said this "Hurting people hurt people". You probably won't be able to change her, and you don't want to be the one to lash out (because that will just cause more criticism)..Just pray for her, and love her from "afar" lol..