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Pulled Over for Speeding

Discussion in 'Jokes & Humor (Clean)' started by BroTom64, Jan 5, 2016.

  1. BroTom64

    BroTom64 Active Member
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    An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...
    Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

    Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

    Older Woman: Oh, I see.

    Officer: Can I see your license please?

    Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

    Officer: Don't have one?

    Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.

    Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

    Older Woman: I can't do that.

    Officer: Why not?

    Older Woman: I stole this car.

    Officer: Stole it?

    Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

    Officer: You what?

    Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

    The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

    Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.

    Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

    Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

    Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

    Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

    The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

    Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

    Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
    The officer is quite stunned.

    Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

    The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

    The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

    Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

    Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.
     
  2. just-want-peace

    just-want-peace Well-Known Member
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    If their body cameras don't have sound, they should!!Sneaky
     
  3. TCassidy

    TCassidy Late-Administator Emeritus
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    Mine does. And so does my dash cam. :)
     
  4. InTheLight

    InTheLight Well-Known Member
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    Last time I got pulled over I had a cop with Alzheimer's. He comes up to my window, asks for my driver's license and then says,

    "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
     
  5. Sue-Ellen

    Sue-Ellen Active Member

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    lol that's a good one!
     
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