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Laodicean hymnal

Discussion in 'Jokes & Humor (Clean)' started by thisnumbersdisconnected, Jul 15, 2014.

  1. thisnumbersdisconnected

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    The Laodicean church is described in the Bible in the book of The Revelation as being lukewarm. If the Laodiceans were to have a hymnal, suitable for their conviction, here's a list of some of the hymns it may contain:

    According to the Suggestions Made in Your Word

    Alas! And Did my Savior Stub His Toe

    All Creatures of Our Friend and Buddy

    All Hail the Influence of Jesus' Name

    All My Mistakes are Gone

    Amazing Grace, How Interesting the Sound

    Be Thou My Hobby

    Blessed Hunch

    Blessed Insurance

    Blest Be the Tie That Doesn't Cramp My Style

    Crown Him with Many Hats

    Fairest Bud, Jesus

    Fill My Spoon, Lord

    Give What You Don't Want To the Master

    God is Our Excuse and Our Alibi

    Hail, Jesus, You're My Acquaintance

    Have My Own Way, Lord

    He Draws Me a Map

    He is Looked Up To

    He Pardoned My Mistakes

    Here I Am, Send Aaron

    He's Quite a Bit to Me

    How Good Thou Art

    How Above Average is Your Name

    I Have Decided To Forego Jesus

    I Lay My Inappropriate Behaviors on Jesus

    I Love to Talk about Telling the Story

    I Am Standing In the Vicinity of the Word of God

    I Am Weak, But You Are Not As Weak

    I Need Thee Every Year or So

    I Surrender Some

    I Will Make an Effort Not To Forget Thee

    I'm Fairly Certain That My Redeemer Lives

    Joyful, Joyful, We Kinda Like Thee

    Just as I Pretend to Be

    Lord, Keep Us Loosely Connected to Your Word

    Luck of our Fathers

    Must I Obey?

    My Hope Is Built on Nothing Much

    Not My Life - Let Me Be

    O Come, All Ye Wishy Washy

    O Come Let Us Ignore Him.

    O God, Our Enabler in Ages Past

    Oh, How I Like Jesus

    Onward, Christian Girl Scouts

    Part of the Way with Jesus

    Pass Me By, O Gentle Savior

    Pillow of Ages, Fluffed for Me

    Precious Lord, Take My Finger

    Praise God from Whom All Affirmations Flow

    Scrimmage Hymn of the Republic

    Self-Esteem to the World! The Lord Is Come

    Shrug Your Shoulders, All Ye People

    Sit Up, Sit up for Jesus

    Special, Special, Special

    Spirit of the Living God, Fall Somewhere Near Me

    Surely Goodness and Money

    Sweet Minute of Prayer

    Teach Me, Lord, Thy Easy Way

    There Is Scattered Cloudiness in My Soul Today

    There Shall Be Sprinkles of Blessings

    We Are Milling Around in the Light of God

    What an Acquaintance We Have in Jesus

    What Can Wash Away My Errors in Judgment?

    When Peace, like a Trickle

    When the Saints Go Sneaking In

    Where He Leads Me, I Will Consider Following

    Whisper and Sing

    Yes, I Think So
     
  2. InTheLight

    InTheLight Well-Known Member
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    ROFL! Very well done!

    Also caused some introspection...
     
  3. Mrs.Owl

    Mrs.Owl New Member

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    Hah! I've seen a few of these but not all. Reminds me of my pastor...when my sister and I sang "My God is a Righteous God", he talked about how too many people have the 'my God is an awesome God' attitude, but they don't focus on His Righteousness.
     
  4. Carolina Baptist

    Carolina Baptist Active Member

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    There's always that great Baptist anthem: Fuss and Complain to the tune of Trust and Obey.
     
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