1 Corinthians 11: 3

I kinda like this verse.
What does God do for man?
He promises to take care of him. He provides safety, blessings, comfort, companionship, a wonderful influence, and love.
This is what a man should also do for a woman.
PREACH IT BROTHER!
Gina

 

There is not a wife alive who would not be quite happy with this arrangement if every man were to treat his wife as good as Christ treats the husband.

 

Good point Artimaeus!

 

The text shows that submission exists within the Godhead. Therefore, submission is not an evil thing for women to do. It further debunks the mindless idea of mutual submission, as the Father never submits to Christ and Christ never submits to man.

 

But how do you deal with it when you wish to follow the Biblical order of marriage but your husband refuses to fulfil his role yet claims to be saved and puts forth the demeanor at church that he is what he doesn't act at home? After our marriage, we searched for several months for a good church and finally found the church we are currently attending. Since we've been attending this church I have grown leaps and bounds spiritually and have learned many things... one of which is that if I had been this spiritually mature before my marriage, I would not have gotten remarried but rather would have tried to restore my first marriage. But alas, there is nothing I can do about it but repent and go on with my life, hopefully within the Lord's will. I say this because a lot of the problems we have in our home is that he doesn't wish to discipline his daughter (15 year) who is disrespectful, wants her own way, refuses to clean up after herself, and he refuses to force the issue. He never opens His Bible outside of church but rather reads biographies and auto-biographies of former great evangelists, revivals in former centuries, etc. I've been praying for two years for our home to be under the leadership of the Lord, but I feel like I'm spinning my wheels in vain. He also likes to drink beer and has no problem going to a local pub - first he admits he knows it's not right and he's not going to do it any more... the next thing I know, he's having a couple here and there again. Yet he preaches at my daughter and me to be perfect.

It's all confusing for us. He never makes a point of ensuring his daughter treats us with any kind of respect... not even himself!

Any advice? I fully agree with God's Word on this subject and I am fully willing to fall within the Lord's guidelines. When hubby promises he will do better, I feel a great weight lift off my shoulders, but as the days and weeks go by and I see no improvement, then I feel the weight returning because I can't depend on him. And I need to do so. I can't do it on my own. I need the spiritual leadership and guidance of my husband but have had to do without except when it suits his purposes to preach at me, yet refuse to heed his own advice.

Nomads Wife

 

I understand my role. How do we deal with the fact that our family is being hurt by his lack of action? That's where I'm having issues. We have a younger child in the house who is watching this and learning ungodly habits from this older child and learning that there are two sets of rules in our home. I discipline her and she follows rules. The 15 year old however speaks however she wishes (4 letter words), listens to ungodly music, is disrespectful, sloppy, gets into her father's face and tries to intimidate him, etc. This is our home life... not a very good witness for the Lord. I'm so tired because I pray and I pray and I pray...I beg him to lead us, but he doesn't.

 

I pray and I pray and I pray...I beg him to lead us, but he doesn't

I'm speaking here about begging my hubby to lead us... I have the utmost faith in the Lord.

Nomads Wife

 

Dr. Bob is correct, Nomad's wife. The Bible tells us that the man might be won by the testimony of the wife. Believe me, the younger child will see the heartache caused by his daughter and might model herself to be the opposite.

Continue to submit, as long as hubby doesn't ask you to do anything that is against God's word. Keep praying and expecting him to change. God's promises do not fail! I've found over the many years I've been married that many times I speak the loudest when I remain silent.

Can I suggest you sweetly ask the teen to not cuss in front of the smaller child. Explain that sister looks up to her and you're sure she wouldn't want the little one to use such language in public.

Also, as for the 15 year old, I don't know where her mother is but you should know that many teens will act out and push boundaries even in the most perfect homes. I wonder if your husband is either too lazy to discipline her, too tired or feels guilt. The mistake many of us make is thinking we can be our childs friend or win their good behavior by giving in or giving things.

You cannot change hubby but he can change by your godly example and the example of your little one. I assume she's his child too?

Now, Blackbird.... I agree with Daniel David (again today) and I have no problem with that verse. In fact, I find great comfort in that verse!

Diane

 

You can preach on how when the hands try to usurp the position of the head and the head does nothing about it then the entire body is in much trouble.

You will find that a great many Church leaders, preachers deacons teachers, etc, who only seem to cause or be the root of problems in the Church have a wife behind them that is a "busybody" and a griper who rules the home with much bitterness until her will be done. Many a good Christian man has become corrupt by their heathen wife.

On the other side though the greatest leaders nearly 99.9% of the time will have a wonderful wife standing by them. God bless those great women who make their men to be great leaders through their devotion, love & encouragement.

 

What if your head tells you your husband is wrong?

 

Ephesians 5
18And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, 19addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with all your heart, 20giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, 21submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Matthew 26
53 Do you think that I cannot appeal to my Father, and he will at once send me more than twelve legions of angels? 54 But how then should the Scriptures be fulfilled, that it must be so?"

John 13
13 You call me Teacher and Lord, and you are right, for so I am. 14 If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another's feet. 15 For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you. 16 Truly, truly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him.

Mutual submission is far from mindless. It's Scriptural.

 

Nomads Wife

I do not agree with some of the counsel that you have received in this thread. Pray diligently, everyday, for God to show you what to do and to give you the courage and fortitude to do it.

 

Amen!

 

What are we to make of the Old Testament story of Nabal and Abagail (1Samuel 25)? In this account we have a woman who does not submit to her husband's desire to spurn David. She circumnavigates his authority in order to save the household. Consequently, David praises her for preventing him from commiting an evil act.

Or what of the Shunammite woman in 2Kings 4:8-10? Her husband submits to her desire to build a room for Elisha. As a result the couple is blessed with a child. Later in the story, it is she who takes the reigns of a donkey to go see the prophet when the boy dies. In verse 23 she does not even answer her husband as to why nor does she seek his approval. As a result the boy is restored to life.

In Paul's instructions in 1Corinthians 11:3, Ephesians 5, and Colossians 3, the Apostle is addressing Christians within a church. The very nature of Christianity is that we submit to one another. Submission is a voluntary act. It is the husband who actually bears the greater burden in these imperatives. He is to love his wife and not be harsh. If he is truly to love his wife as Christ loves the church, he must be willing to ultimately die for her.

One can not command a voluntary action such as submission. The husband can not order it from his wife. It is most easily gained from love. Authority? There's no argument here on the Biblical heirarchy of authority. The very nature of things sets that in place. Men are stronger and can command obedience from women. God is stronger and can command obedience from men. This is not, however, the way in which submission is attained in the Christian system. It stems from voluntary choice brought about by a loving God.

How did Christ become exalted to be the head of the church? Paul explains in the beautiful Christology of Philippians 2:

Philippians 2
5Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, 6who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, 7but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. 8And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. 9Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, 10so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

If a Christian husband adopts this attitude with his Christian wife, she will exalt him, she will submit. It's the way God wired us.

[ August 01, 2004, 05:11 AM: Message edited by: Clint Kritzer ]

 

When Adam sinned, both he and Eve messed up their wiring. Does faith in the atonement of Christ repair all the damaged wiring?

 

Please rephrase the question and I will attempt to answer it.