Being relevant in society

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by TaterTot, Jul 11, 2006.

  1. TaterTot

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    Today I spent the day with a group of kids from church. We have a good number of new ones coming since VBS, and they are assimilating into the group nicely. But so many of these kids are hungry for attention. They are crying out for what they arent getting at home. Its not just these kids, they are everywhere. I see them at school every day, and I know you see them too.
    What is WRONG with these parents that they do not choose to nurture their children?? They let daughters wear clothes that accuentuate the adult body that is taking shape, but their minds are not matching in maturity. The girls see that they get attention this way, not knowing whats REALLY going on in guys minds, and the problem perpetuates itself.

    There are so many of them. When we got home from out childrens outting, we have 5 calls from the same set of twins (who came to our VBS but are members at another church) - just wanting to talk. Nothing specific. Throwing a KJV 1611 and a shaped note hymnal just aint gonna teach em to how to shop for clothes that wont make boys go crazy. And it isnt going to give them the quality time that they so desperately want, need, and deserve from someone who loves and accepts them without wanting anything in return. (ok, discuss)
     
  2. Friend of God

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    Neither Quality Time nor Quanity Time

    Tater, you have touched on one of the greatest dilemmas of today's family.

    The kids are under such peer pressure to fit in with their age group that it is easy for them to make poor choices.

    A lot of times with Mom & Dad working two jobs, with more mandatory overtime, leaves the parents both stressed & tired.

    Unfortunately, it's a lot easier to send the kids to their friends house to entertain them, and feed them, etc.

    We have seen the very same things you've mentioned with kids who've attended VBS. All of a sudden someone new is actually listening to them, and paying attention to them. These kids are so starved for even a little attention that they eat it up, even if it's only for a short period of time.

    Time with the family today is neither quality time, not quanity time.

    Jesus changed the lives of many people who wanted, and desperately needed somebody to listen to them, laugh with them, and cry with them.

    We may be the only "Jesus" these kids ever see, or have heard of.{not an original thought} Awesome responsibility isn't it?

    Tater, dear friend, I'm sorry if I sounds like I'm preaching to the choir, but if parents, and society, don't wake up, and soon we're going to be facing another lost generation - one that is lost & looking with nobody who cares to look at them, or for them.

    Thank God you're there to look, listen, and to care. God Bless You.

    Rob
     
    #2 Friend of God, Jul 11, 2006
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 11, 2006
  3. Mishelly

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    I know how you feel. I wish I could do more to help not only the youth but young adults understand what there image is realy saying.

    So many people have friends but no one realy to talk with or just for someone to listen to them. I tried with my niece but her heart has been hardened and she does not believe the truth of Jesus.

    I pray to know what to say and do to help more.

    My prayers are with you and just knowing that those children feel comfortable calling to talk with you and your family gives me peace in that they see God in you.

    Keep up the good work and you are in my prayers :praying:
     
  4. Pastor Larry

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    This is the part of ministry that requires spending time in discipleship, building relationships with these kids and teachign them what they need to know. My wife on Saturday spent a long time on our front porch with a neighbor girl talking about these very kinds of things, and they were things she had never heard of. Her mom and step dad recently visited our church for a special series of talks on marriage we are doing. It is a great opportunity, but we have to be willing to put the time in for it.
     
  5. LeBuick

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    If you all ever figure this out let me know. I do know they will just as easily attract to a gang as they do to you. They just want to feel loved.
     
  6. TaterTot

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    I read just tonight that the average working mother spends only 11 minutes of quality time with her children per day, 8 minutes for Dads. That means sitting down talking, playing, being together. Not eating in front of the tv or necessarily being in the same room together, but actually focusing on the child(ren). How sad.
     
  7. tinytim

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    exactly! Tater even referred to it... they are craving attention.
    They want to be loved... Not condemned.

    Once they realize you REALLY care for them, they will respond to you.
    But they know the difference between a Christian pretending to care in order to "win their soul" and a Christian that truly cares, and wants to be around them.

    Tater, show them love, true love... Apparently you are, if they are responding to you this way...
     
  8. PastorSBC1303

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    One of the greatest challenges of ministry...all I know you can do is just reach out and love those God brings in your path one at a time. Don't get discouraged by those you can't reach, but focus on those God has brought into your life.
     
  9. tinytim

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    That reminds me of a story I once heard:

    While walking along a beach, a man saw thousands of starfish the tide had thrown onto the beach. Unable to return to the ocean during low tide, the starfish were dying. He observed a young man picking up the starfish one by one and throwing them back into the water.

    After watching the seemingly futile effort, the observer said, "There must be thousands of starfish on this beach. You can't possibly save enough to matter." The young man smiled as he continued to pick up another starfish and tossed it back into the ocean. "It matters to this one," he replied.

    EACH ONE MATTERS!!!!!
     
  10. LeBuick

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    Good story, how true.
     
  11. gb93433

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    We live in a very affluent society that does not value work but wealth. Parents give their kids lots of material items but not what they really need. It is in society and inside the church. People value entertainment and cutting taxes more than educating their children and sacrificing their money and time for the cause of Christ.

    Sometime if you want to get an eye-opener just read “The World Is Flat: A Brief History of the Twenty-first Century” by Thomas L. Friedman. You would be shocked at what is happening around the world.
     
  12. ktn4eg

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    I'm reminded of a statement made by a parent of a child who'd been arrested for shoplifting:

    "I just can't understand why she would do this. After all, I bought her every thing that she ever asked for!"

    (Duh............)

    As many of the previous posts have indicated, much of the blame for today's youth's lack of spiritual insight and integrity needs to be laid at the feet of parents.

    For the most part, they've abandoned their children when it comes to instilling any sense of character and integrity.

    When I was asked to speak to our Sunday morning service upon my return from the desert during the early days of Operation Iraqi Freedom, I thank God that He gave me the opportunity to point out the real heroes in my book weren't necessarily those in uniform serving on some remote location.

    My heroes are those parents who've sacrificed their time, ambitions, and worldly recognition and have chosen to spend it rearing their children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord!!

    Your children are the only thing that you've got in this life that you can ever hope to take along with you to heaven. Would to God that more parents would see this.

    There's a TV program on some cable channel called "Dirty Jobs" that I came across one day. I'm sure that sometimes parenting would fall into that category. But look at the bottom line for all the blood, sweat, toil, and tears you've invested!!

    A former pastor of mine told me of his favorite verse in Genesis. It wasn't 1:1. It was 7:1 -- "And the LORD said unto Noah, Come thou and all thy house into the ark: for thee have I seen righteous before me in this generation."
     
  13. 2BHizown

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    Often I see mothers, or even fathers with several or many little kids in the grocery, or shopping. Mom is on the cell phone and cant be bothered with the kids, who follow along, doing whatever as no one seems to care!

    Constant sensory stimulation, cell phones, video games, TV, talk, talk, talk, but with no time or energy invested in their kids! Who on earth do these people talk to so constantly as they shop, walk, or drive along thru life! Constant chatter, mindless of where they are or where they're going! Scary!!
     
  14. SBCPreacher

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    I might be getting my self in trouble here, but I think far to may parents have sacrificed their children on the altar of the newer, bigger house, 2 (or 3 or 4) new cars, the bigger boat, the vacation home, the... on and on the list goes. And to get all these things dads and moms are both working longer hours, and spending less and less time with their kids. They've left THEIR responsibility to raise their children to others or even to the kids themselves.

    Now, it's the kids who set the schedules.
    It's the kids who choose the clothes.
    It's the kids who are making the decisions that dad and mom are supposed to be making.
    And this just isn't right.

    Maybe, just maybe, if they gave up a couple of the new cars and drove an older one that was paid for, gave up on the vacation home and some other non-escentials, mom could work a part-time job or no job at all and raise their own children. I know that there are many situations where mom can't stay at home, but there are far too many times that mom could, but simply chooses not to.

    My children are the most precious, valuable things God has given my wife and I. We may do without many "things" - we don't drive new cars, we don't live in a fancy house, etc. - but we still eat supper around the table almost every night as a family. We are not willing to sacrifice our children on the altar of "things."

    OK, let the attacks start - I'm ready!
     
  15. 2BHizown

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    Totally agree! :thumbs:
     
  16. Aubre

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    I am a brand-new dad (9 wks) but I try to do these things:

    -When he stops eating from the bottle and eats the same time we do, we will sit at the table with the TV off.
    -I make sure I tell him I love him every day, usually several times a day.
    -I'm going to teach him personal responsibility, which I think is severely lacking.
    -I am specifically going to ask for the Holy Spirit to guide me in parenting.
     
  17. Aubre

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    You can replace a car or a house - you can't replace your kids.
     
  18. Gold Dragon

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    I believe culturally relevant teaching in church isn't something that only kids need. Adults need it too.
     
  19. SBCPreacher

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    I just have to ask... Don't you think at 9 weeks he should be lacking in personal responsibility?

    I know what you meant, but that just struck me as kinda funny!
     

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