Can the pastor tell me to get out the Church?

Discussion in '2003 Archive' started by Testimony, Jan 13, 2003.

  1. Testimony

    Testimony
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    On a regular basis, our pastor somehow manages to slip little comments like, "Hit the road, Jack and don't come back" into his sermons. These comments are aimed at some of the "older" members who may not agree with everything he is doing. You see, our pastor is just 37 years old and has made the comment that he basically has no use for people 40 and older. I know, I know, if he keeps living, 40 is right around to corner for him, but for right now this is his attitude.

    What do y'all think? :confused:
     
  2. tyndale1946

    tyndale1946
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    I think it is time for all you members to show the pastor who the church is!... He may be a Pastor but he is also a member and instead of becoming an overseer he has become an overlord to the flock he is suppose to feed!... The whole church is guilty as you are allowing his unchristian behavior to continue!... Your Pastor needs to be taken to the pasture and given a good talking too!... Using the Bible he teaches from scripture and verse!... He gotten to big for his young britches... IMHO... I know my church wouldn't put up with those antics!... How would he feel preaching to an empty church?... Brother Glen :(
     
  3. Jim1999

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    Wow! Guess he would have me singing in the amen corner at my age... [​IMG]

    I quite agree, I would have his knickers twisting a bit. All throughout scripture we are admonished to respect our elders...the elderly.

    Cheers,

    Jim
     
  4. mountainrun

    mountainrun
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    You don't have a pastor. You have a road boss.
    Sheep are not dragged along by their shepard, they are led. My church, some years before I joined, were unfortunate enough to hire a man without getting references and doing some checking on him.
    He pretty much told anyone who disagreed with him "there's the door."
    This led to a split from which the church is still suffering the effects.
    As I understand it, the man has moved to several other churches with the same results.

    Bring up your concerns to the pastor. If he is unresponsive, bring the matter up at the business meeting. Even if it is not resolved, he will become aware that the behaviour is offensive and may straighten up his act.
    37 is old enough not to act like an arrogant child.

    MR
     
  5. Jeff Weaver

    Jeff Weaver
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    Time for that pastor to hit the bricks. Course I am over 40. But when I was a kid I stayed with my grandparents most of the time. He might be surprised how much old folks know.
     
  6. Testimony

    Testimony
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    We're told on a regular basis to leave but the hurting thing is we've been there for years, call this our "church home" and don't think we deserve this type of treatment.
     
  7. Testimony

    Testimony
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    We have tried talking to him; we even wrote him a letter asking him to "Come, let us reason together". This letter only infuriated him and he has held that against us every since. In the letter we also asked him to just give us the Word and not infuse his sermons with his own personal feelings. Of course the young people in our church think he is absolutely right and putting us "in our place".
     
  8. Dr. Bob

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    With that thought from George Barna (I am told) I would ask HOW this man came to be your pastor? How could this attitude go unchecked? Where is the membership of the church in this bitter display of carnality?

    Now, IF the body knew and IF the pastor has the support of the majority, then you have the hard decision of staying there or (as your pastor suggests) not letting the doorknob hit you in the rear . . . :rolleyes:
     
  9. tyndale1946

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    Testimony there are a lot of brethren on here with a lot of experience and between all of us we have probably seen everything that could befall a church and its members. Seems to me and I can't speak for the other brethren that this is a no win situation!... You loved the church that use to be that no longer is and it is my opinion that for your spiritual welfare and growth that you get out!... If you are looking for another church where you are wanted and will be loved there are many Baptist brethren on here that can direct you to the right church for you!... Am I right brethren?... All you have to do is ask!... The BB has many resources and finding a church should be no problem!... I live in San Diego and I see you live in LA am I right?... You are welcome to my church anytime if you care to make the trip or I'm sure there are others on here that can recommend one close to you!... Brother Glen [​IMG]

    [ January 14, 2003, 12:49 AM: Message edited by: tyndale1946 ]
     
  10. Abiyah

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    I have been excommunicated, but not for my
    age. This young whipper-snapper seems pre-
    posterous! 8oD

    The same pastor who excommunicated me
    saw the church drop from having a congregation
    of @ 225 with half of those being under age 25 to
    @ 75 with only about 10 members being under
    age 25--in his first year there! Then he booted
    me, and my son and his family left; my husband
    left 9 months later as well as a handful of others.

    They got a new pastor, and there was recently
    another big exodus which left a small congrega-
    tion without a 1 of its 3 pianists, soloists, and SS
    teacher (my daughter); its music minister and
    another SS teacher (my son-in-law) Sunday
    school superintendant and teacher, and another
    SS teacher and soloist, as well as five children
    aged 1 - 13. What he does not know is that others
    are presently looking for other churches.

    People will only put up with so much, and after
    years of trying, they will rightfully shake the dust
    off their feet and move on.

    But what most amazes me is that the pastor will
    blame everyone but himself and will make such
    inane statements as:
    "They were never of us, or they would not have
    gone out from us," said with a self-righteous
    shake of the head.
    "They have chosen a lesser gospel."
    "They have given up the real for the false."
    "I tried to work with them, but they would not
    cooperate," said with a fake puzzled look.
    "They tell me they feel so free now!" said with a
    puzzled look.
    Etc., etc., etc.

    For all of us, it was a good thing to leave; for you,
    it sounds like he needs to know he was hired by you.

    [ January 14, 2003, 01:10 AM: Message edited by: Abiyah ]
     
  11. Madelyn Hope

    Madelyn Hope
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    One thing to consider before leaving a "home church" (particularly one that you or your family has a deep connection to) is that pastors come and go and every church has its seasons in which it may be stronger or weaker in its ministry to individual members. Perhaps this pastor won't stay too long (particularly if he is alienating much of the congregation).

    Then again, staying in a abusive church situation (whether the abuse comes from the pastor or other members) is not what I believe God usually intends for us to do. This might be an opportunity God is giving you to become involved in other local ministries or churches (even, gasp, non-Baptist ones as my parents did when they could not tolerate their church situation any more).
     
  12. EPH 1:4

    EPH 1:4
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    This man sounds like most IFB pastors, not much bible knowledge, just a dictator. :(
     
  13. Don

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    That's funny, Eph, 'cause in the small town I currently live in--it's the small Southern Baptist preachers as well as the IFBers....

    Please don't overgeneralize. You may use the word "many," but I don't think "most" is anywhere near accurate....

    Testimony, as I stated in another thread, you need to get with a couple of other members, and you need to take action.
     
  14. Gina B

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    Have everyone 40 and older quit tithing. People are usually settled into financial stability at that age and up, I've noticed it's the 40-60 age group that is stable in their tithing and amounts.
    Gina
     
  15. TheOliveBranch

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    I am surprised at how so many will support a decision against this Pastor without hearing the other side.

    If what you say is true, Testimony, then you obviously aren't happy where you are at. If you raise your hand against this Pastor, you will be accountable before God for this. How did this man come to be the Pastor? Did the people agree to him coming in? Was this man ordained as a minister by churches and a promise before God? If he has turned away from God, the best thing to do is leave. Quit counting the years under your belt and just do "that which is right in God's eyes" and not your own. If what you say is true, God will take care of him. Prayer is the best thing to do for him. Not gossip, or slander. Not trying to get people on your side.
     
  16. Gina B

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    I can't agree with that. A person doesn't join because of a pastor and they don't leave because of one. (shouldn't, actually)
    If there is a problem with him it needs to be dealt with. There's no reason leaving or dividing a church over an issue with one person that hasn't had an attempt at resolution. :(
    Gina
     
  17. hrhema

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    I sat in a situation where everyone wanted to complain about the pastor but no one had the nerve to do anything about it. THis church has lost half of its members and is still dwindling because they should have never invited such a young person to pastor it. The man they chose was only 33 years old. Not seasoned enough to handle a congregation this large but all the deacons do is complain, complain, complain but when someone wants to do something they withhold their vote.

    Unless the leadership takes action nothing will happen. You might as well find another church.
     
  18. TheOliveBranch

    TheOliveBranch
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    But what if the problem is with the congregation, not the Pastor?
     
  19. Don

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    HR, I don't think age has anything to do with it. I've met 60-year-olds that aren't mature, and I've met 20-somethings whose wisdom makes the 60-year-olds look like babes.

    "Seasoning" comes from being seasoned, and ya gotta start sometime.

    Olive Branch, I disagree with your statement at the bottom of page one. YOU, I, and everyone else have a responsibility not just to the pastor, but to EVERY member of our church. If a pastor is doing something we feel is wrong, then it needs to be taken care of before it hurts someone else. Just the other night, I heard about a pastor who preached a good sermon when he was candidating, and the congregation was impressed; after a lengthy interview, they were satisfied with him, and voted him in as their pastor.

    Then the other shoe fell. Turned out the ol' boy merely answered the questions the way he knew they wanted to hear 'em. As soon as he was voted in, they started finding out what he really believed in--but by then, it was too late. He started bringing "his" people in from other places to become members of the church, and before you knew it, they couldn't get a majority vote to vote him out.

    No, this matter HAS to be addressed to Testimony's pastor (soon!), and if he won't hear them, then it has to be brought before the church.

    Oh, and Testimony--as someone pointed out, make sure you've got scripture to back you up.
     
  20. Artimaeus

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    This is a common problem with those who believe that the Pastor is the "boss" of the church. The pastor is not the CEO, he is not the President of the "corporation" It is the responsibility of the church to see to it that their "employee" is doing the job he is supposed to be doing, preaching the word, moderating meetings, being an example, funerals, weddings,, making reccomendations, etc. The pastor does not make "decisions" for the church. The pastor will be the single most influential member. He may have a "bully pulpit" but he is not to be a bully in the pulpit. As I once told a former pastor at our church, "A man convinced against his will, is unconvinced still." This is why a church should have a group of men (called by whatever name) instead of just one man, but, that is another thread.
    To answer the question, NO the pastor does not have the authority to tell anyone to leave. If he is influential enough he can have the church do it. If he is influential enough to have the church ask you to leave for an unscriptural reason then that is a church you need to leave anyway.
     

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