Featured Chuck Norris

I'm having a hard time remembering these jokes.

The opening scenes of "Saving Private Ryan" was loosely based on childhood games that Chuck Norris used to play.

Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience.

Chuck Norris can watch "60 minutes" in about half an hour.

After accidentally eating a whole bottle of sleeping pills, Chuck Norris yawned.

 

When Chuck Norris does push ups he us actually pushing the earth down.

 

Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer. To bad he never cries.

 

Chuck Norris can blink at the weeping Angels. (Yes I'm mixing my fandom's now)

 

If a weeping angel touches Chuck Norris the Weeping Angel goes back in time

 

Chuck Norris made a Happy Meal cry.

 

Necessity is the mother of invention but... MACGYVER is the father.

 

McGyver created a machine to solve all the problems in the universe using only a cotton swab, a dirty sock, and two paperclips.

Chuck Norris then round-house kicked it into oblivion and said, "solve that."

 

Macgyver would harness the energy from that round house kick, use it to power the time machine he built with the lint in his pocket and a shoe string, and go back and erase Chuck Norris.

 

Just seen on CNN: Chuck Norris turns 75; 75 decides to retire.

 

Thanks for posting this .... Chuck has always been a hero to me. Happy birthday and many more tl a brother in Jesus.

 

Wow. That is fantastic! :thumbs: :applause: :thumbs:

 

Thanks. My husband and I are Whovians and we spent a day coming up with Chuck Norris/Doctor Who statements a few months back.

 

Nice. I really wasn't expecting to find many Whovians on the BB. Allons-y!

 

Im sure there are a few of us. Although my husband and I have not seen the current season, so I don't know if we could still be considered Whovians.

 

At the risk of thread-derailment, I think you'll like it. Peter Capaldi is excellent as the Doctor. I loved Matt Smith, but he never really had truly good stories. They were either too rushed or too weak. Capaldi has dialed things back and seems to fit more with the 3rd and 4th Doctors than with any of the current re-issue series.

 

That's what we have heard and its not from lack of desire but the fact that we just don't have cable and don't have the extra money to justify Hulu when there is so much we can watch for free on there. But we figure someday when we are no longer newlyweds just making ends meet we will be able to get caught up.

 

Another one, here!

I go WAY back to the mid-80's watching the original series on PBS.

I found Capaldi to be a good character for the Doctor. It's just too bad the stories have been mostly terrible.

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