Church Discipline?

Discussion in '2003 Archive' started by C.S. Murphy, Oct 14, 2003.

  1. C.S. Murphy

    C.S. Murphy
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    Being a SBC pastor I know little about church discipline [​IMG] but I have to ask a question. If the following imaginary event occured in an SBC church would you consider the actions of the pastor normal and can you state biblical evidence why it is correct. A young widower with children who is a strong worker in the church (childrens ss etc.) begins dating. This apparently does not meet the approval of the leadership and she is stripped of her duties. After being called into the office and having her so called sinful behaviour explained to her she never returns to church. About 2 months later the pastor informs the church that they are removing her from fellowhip. The members are told to keep communication with this person to an absolute minimum and that nobody should be seen publically with her.

    Let me know your thoughts.
    Murph
     
  2. Gunther

    Gunther
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    Is it wrong for a widower to date? I don't follow.
     
  3. Don

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    I don't care whether the church is SBC or otherwise; I need to hear more about what the church is using to justify this behavior towards her, since scripture seems to indicate she's doing nothing wrong.

    1 Corinthians 7:8 I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I.
    9 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

    Is it that she's carrying on a sexual (out of wedlock) relationship? If so, how did they come to find this out?
     
  4. C.S. Murphy

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    I think that someone in the church saw the new boyfriends car at her home overnight. I am told the reason given was that he lived out of town and on this occasion decided to sleep on the couch. The lady has young teen children and promised the leadership that nothing sexual occurred.
    Murph
     
  5. Pastor Larry

    Pastor Larry
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    Not smart on her part. Get the guy a motel room or something. There is no need for this needless act. Removing her from her ministry for a period of time may not have been out of line. It would depend on a number of things such as her response to confrontation, etc. When she refused to come to church, she was willfully absenting herself from the body to which she committed herself. That does call for removal. Whether 2 months is an appropriate time frame or not is hard to tell. It depends on the church.
     
  6. Grasshopper

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    I'm on the Lady's side with the info given. Maybe they will replace her with a gluttonous woman who is 150 pounds overwieght.
     
  7. dianetavegia

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    Now this is a perfect example of 'even the appearance of evil'! Under NO circumstances should that man have stayed in her home without another adult present.

    Murph, we're hearing of this type of 'church discipline' in a church down the road from us. It's done at the end of service. People will stand up and call 'out' someone they have 'caught' in sin. We have actually been in one service where a young married couple were made to stand before the church and admit they had sex before marriage.

    The situation you're sharing is not at a very loving church.

    Diane
     
  8. TomVols

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    Huh?

    Larry wrote:
    Exactly right.
    However, not knowing all the details, this is hard to comment on.

    Sometimes the most loving thing we can do is practice discipline in an effort to promote godliness.
     
  9. Artimaeus

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    :confused: The Pastor informs the church??? What happened to matters of church discipline being brought before the church for THEM to decide.

    The whole point of church discipline is to win this person BACK not to shun them. Treat them just as well as you would a lost person you are trying to win. They aren't you Christian "buddy" right now but still someone you want to repent. You don't "hang" with them but, keep the lines of communication open for the purpose of recovery.
     
  10. David Mark

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    Artimaeus hits nail on head and then drives nail home. [​IMG]
     
  11. TheOliveBranch

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    I'm not in disagreement, but could you point out in scripture where it states that the point of discipline is to win this person back?
     
  12. Don

    Don
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  13. TheOliveBranch

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    Fogive me, but I don't see that it says that he is disciplined to be restored into the fellowship. Is it a principle, or a conclusion we assume because there would be no constructive reason, other than it being a danger to the other brothers (Gal 6)?
     
  14. russell55

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    In 1 Corinthians 5 Paul says that the purpose for removing the immoral man from among them was so that his spirit might be saved.
     
  15. Don

    Don
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    Matthew 18:15 Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.

    Matthew 18:21 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?
    22 Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.

    Galatians 6:1 ...restore such an one....

    The goal for bringing a problem to light is to gain thy brother. If the problem is brought forward, and the individual asks forgiveness, we are to forgive.

    The indication in 1 Corinthians 5 (And ye are puffed up, and have not rather mourned, that he that hath done this deed might be taken away from among you) is that the church is fully aware of the individual's sin, and is knowingly allowing it to continue unchecked. sort of the same as knowingly allowing an openly practicing adulterer or homosexual to be a member of your congregation.
     
  16. David Mark

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    We fret, we pray, we hope, we shed tears, we respect, love and spend time with folks who we think the Lord is trying to reach. All in hope that they could know the Lord and experience salvation. Sometimes we even make utter fools of ourselves just because there is even a remote chance to win them.

    It just seems like common sense to me to treat a brother who is sort of outside of the fellowship for any reason, at least that well or even better.

    To treat a brother less than that just seems wrong to me. No matter what he has done.

    I think that if I ever give up on one, then I don't deserve to try to win any more.

    Dave.
     

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