discontent in local church

Discussion in 'Pastoral Ministries' started by bloodbought, Aug 29, 2004.

  1. bloodbought

    bloodbought
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    question: i love my ministries in teaching 3rd grade children, preaching in jr. church and my nursing home ministry, however i have not been happy in my local church for years. i do not feel that i have a pastor to counsil with, a good preacher,yes, but not a pastor. the church i'm in is cold and indefferent. i have looked at other churches, but frankly don't believe "running" is the answer. HELP!!
     
  2. Trotter

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    Bloodbought,

    Prayer. I know that sounds trite, but prayer is where you need to begin.

    Having recently left the church I am a member of with the same basic problem as you describe, I know it is not easy. I left, but my wife and daghter have not. Sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do.

    In Christ,
    Trotter
     
  3. Pastor Larry

    Pastor Larry
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    What if everyone in the church expected the same thing from your pastor that you do? If you church is larger than 10-12 people, they probably can't get it. I would suggest kindly that you examine your expectations. Too many people expect too much from the pastor. Don't misunderstand ... there is a lot to do and they should expect a lot. But in terms of time, the pastor only has so much and he cannot be everything to everyone. He has to prioritize. I would suggest that you find some other relationships in the church and build those. Pour your life into them and establish those relationships.
     
  4. Bro.Bill

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    Or you could make an appointment and have a sitdown with your pastor. sounds like you don't even know what he thinks. How busy is he? Also He could think you are doing great.Here you teach and preach at the church ,then have a nurseing home ministry, that is quite a bit.
    Also do you have any Bible college or seminary? Are you looking for a mentor? What exactly is it you are asking of your pastor? He obviously thinks highly of you if you are teaching Sunday School and preaching to the youth church.
     
  5. North Carolina Tentmaker

    North Carolina Tentmaker
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    Bloodbought:

    I can really relate to what you are saying, I have been there before. We were part of a church similar to that for years. The pastor was a great preacher, but a poor pastor. Too busy to notice the discontent in his own church. Sitting down with your pastor might help. I think you should try. But in my case I tried that and it did not. If you do make the decision to leave you should meet with your pastor again and explain exactly why you are leaving. He may not listen but you should give him the opportunity.

    It is hard to know when to leave a church. You want to pray and follow the Spirit of course. The deciding factor for me has always been a question of evangelism. When I got to the point that I felt I could no longer in good conscience recommend the church to others or invite people to come to church with me, then I knew it was time to find a different church.
     
  6. exscentric

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    Acts 20.28 "Take heed therefore unto yourselves, and to all the flock, over the which the Holy Ghost hath made you overseers, to feed the church of God, which he hath purchased with his own blood."

    I would call attention to the word "all", Paul's word not mine :)
     
  7. Pastor Larry

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    I assume you are referring to me and my comments excentric. My point is that the mere reality of life dictates that the pastor can be personally involved with only so many people. But it is not merely reality. In Acts 6, you see where those charged with prayer and the ministry of the word gave the "personal connection" ministry to others. The pastors need to give that "personal connection" ministry to others so they can concentrate on prayer and the ministry of the word ... and then they need to do that, not use the time for other things.
     
  8. Circuitrider

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    I am with Pastor Larry on this one, bloodbought. I have had people complain about my ministry....not being fed, not meeting their needs, not caring for their soul....etc. Maybe your pastor is not doing a great job, but maybe in the spirit of Acts 6 he needs some help. You seem to have a ministry in the church, why walk away from it? Step up to the plate and make a difference. If the church is cold and unfriendly, then begin being the greeter that talks to every person in the service and then share the burdens with your pastor and help him by holding up his hands. ;)
     
  9. exscentric

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    In Acts 6 it was deacons I believe and Acts 20 was elders where "all" is the criteria.

    If you are shepherd of a flock you protect, feed and water all, not just a few. Yes, you may concentrate on specific ones now and then but all are the standard or you loose sheep - both in the heard and in the church :)

    You mention "concentrate on prayer and the ministry" and that is great if you personally do that but the national averages don't show this as the priority of many pastors - I think the last survey of evangelical pastors I saw listed daily prayer at about five minutes a day. Not a real high priority :-( - he says crawling back under his rock :)
     
  10. Bro.Bill

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    Well I guess we should ask some questions about your church and pastor.
    1. Is he fulltime or bivocational?
    2. How many are in church on sunday?
    3. Does he do visitation?
    4. Is he available for counselling?
    5. How many sermons and lessons does he prepare each week?
    6. Who trains the Sunday school staff?
    7. How many children does the pastor have and how old are they?
    8. How is your pastors health?
    9. How much support does the pastor get from the church members?
    10. How many committees is the pastor on?
    11. How active of an administrator is your pastor?
    12. Does your church have associate pastors?What do they do?
    13. How many deacons are in your church? What are thier duties?
    14.How busy is your pastor?
    15.Is there enough of him to go around?
    16. Who is sharing the load with him?
     
  11. Pastor Larry

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    And that is done, as Paul says, through preaching and teaching. What was referenced above seems to be a different issue.

    It is right that far too many, myself included, spend too little time in "prayer and the ministry of the word." Often, that is due to busy-ness ... having to do all kinds of things that we are not supposed to be doing anyway. But we must do them because we have not led others to fulfill their roles in the church. Too many people sit back and let the pastor do it, and then complain when the pastor doesn't give them enough time or attention. We need a serious review of what ministry in the church is supposed to be. The people are the ministers, doing the "work of the ministry." The pastor is to teach them how. He is not supposed to do it for them.
     
  12. exscentric

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    "We need a serious review of what ministry in the church is supposed to be. The people are the ministers, doing the "work of the ministry." The pastor is to teach them how. He is not supposed to do it for them. "

    Ahhh, the point has been caught.......
     
  13. Bible Student

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    "The people are the ministers, doing the "work of the ministry." The pastor is to teach them how. He is not supposed to do it for them."

    Pastor Larry you are correct! There are two problems that we have today in our churches. One, we have done a BAD job of teaching our people what church ministry is. Second, church folks have gotten this idea that their job is to come, set and listen; then tell the Pastor everything they need and he must provide it for them.

    When folks come to me and tell me the church needs this ministry or that ministry, I tell them good, since God told you about it, you better get it started...most trun and walk away at that point.... :(

    Richard [​IMG]
     
  14. Bro.Bill

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    Dear Bible Student,
    that is to bad. I agree with you, and one would think with the pastor's blessing and encouragement they would be going full blast.
     
  15. Bro.Bill

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    And is'nt it funny how people in the church can always find plenty for others to do but nothing for themselves.
     
  16. gb93433

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    Just remember who rows the boat and who rocks it.
     
  17. Major B

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    Points:

    The pastor-teacher is a gift from God to the church.

    The ministry's main job is building up the church through preaching and teaching. 2 Tim 4:1-4.

    The work of the ministry is the work of the people.

    The people are responsible to become Bible experts through the ministry of the pastor-teacher.

    The people are expected to mature and become more Christlike.

    If you want me, as your pastor, to visit your house on a pastoral (not a social) call (not having to do with counseling or other actue need), then schedule a Bible study with some friends. If you need to share with me individually, bring your Bible and a notebook, because I will be teaching you something along the way.
     
  18. blackbird

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    Major??? Bro!!! Are you going to forget all what you just said when you move your letter to my church???
     
  19. Major B

    Major B
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    Now, Bro, you know that when I retired from the USAF that I was advised against visiting or moving to any third-world nations...
     

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