After at least thirty minutes of intense study and concentration, I have come to a conclusion after intense meditation that I am an "ESV ONLY". Just so you other people who don't believe me, I can prove it because it says in Psalms 12:6 "The words of the Lord are pure words, like silver refined in a furnace on the ground, purified seven times." You can't argue with that, so don't go and say that I don't have the REAL DEAL. "You, O Lord, will keep them; you will guard us from this generation forever." (He's referring to us ESV Onlies. Gotta be, because that is what it says.) Can't you guys read?" This all started when I was reading my ESV and felt a warm feeling in the bossom. I realized this right after I jumped up and I shoved my little Maltese Terrier to the floor. When I laid an ESV and NIV on the floor, Teddy (the terrier) would go to the ESV every single time. Proof that even an animal knows the real deal. I enjoy reading it so much that I love to read it so much that I often eat a McDonald's burger while studying it. (I'm a sloppy eater, so my wife wipes the pages off when the meat falls out of my bun.) She's so wonderful. In doing research, I also found that the ESV that I have has only about fifty percent of the verses changed from the perfect RSV, so I can't be wrong. No change whatsoever, just minor corrections. Being the RSV was one of the earlier translations, of modern English, it must be correct, so therefore the ESV is a 100% accurate translation since it is within 50% accurate as the RSV. (Of course, those differences are only typos in the original RSV.) Its translators are all perfect (as humans can be). Of course they might have gotten a little worse, but not until the translation was complete. I just can't figure out why it wasn't printed with the apocrypha, stuck back there with the maps and concordances, since that seems to be so important. Now, if anybody has an argument against my point of view, then go for it. (I may not answer the ones I can't, but I will certainly try to get you dizzy.) Go for it, you heathens!!!!!! Note: For those of you who cannot take a joke, this is a parody and I think it is about time that we had a good laugh after all the seriousness posted here. I don't think God has a problem with us using our sense of humor now and then. Notice that I did NOT refer to the Holy Spirit, because although He speaks through the ESV to me, I am not going to cross that barrier. This is intended for amusement only. But, I still dare anybody to prove me wrong!