I was listening to a hymn today. The lyrics said something along the line of “God never fails, he has always been faithful to me, never let me down, I have no regrets from following him.” That is not word for word of course, but something along those lines. We have all heard similar songs before. I don’t doubt the sincerity of the author or singer, but what is the message that song is supposed to bring to the rest of us? I don’t believe I am that abnormal a Christian. I have often felt that God has failed me, let me down, and I have had many regrets. Now I am NOT saying God has let me down. I believe God knows what he is doing and perhaps someday I will understand. Perhaps not, but that is beside the point. The point is that for most of my saved life I have felt deserted, rejected, and let down and I have had many regrets. Again, I know God was there, it just didn't feel like it most of the time. When I hear a song like this, and there are many of them, I immediately feel like a second class citizen in the eyes of God. Why has he let me down so many times when he never failed the author of this song. If God could come through for them, why couldn’t he come through for me? What is wrong with me? Did I not give him all I had and serve him as faithfully as the author of this song? Why do I feel that I have given all and received back so little. I know that these are my problems not God’s and that someday I will understand, but songs like that depress me so much. I don’t understand why so many of them are sung. Are there that many people out there who feel God is faithfull? Am I so unusual for being beset with doubt and fear? If God has been so good to them why does it feel so bad when they rub it in my face?