For all the golfers out there

Discussion in 'Sports' started by Ps104_33, Jul 9, 2005.

  1. Ps104_33

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    Sep 3, 2001
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    Here are some witty sayings about the game of golf.

    May thy ball lie in green pastures -- and not in still waters.

    ~Author Unknown

    The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.
    ~Billy Graham

    Golf appeals to the idiot and the child in us. Just how childlike golfers become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five.

    ~John Updike

    It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf.
    ~Robert Lynd
    If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is.
    ~Horace G. Hutchinson

    They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that.

    ~Gardner Dickinson

    If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death.
    ~Sam Snead

    Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness.
    ~William Wordsworth

    If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt.
    -Dean Martin

    If you are going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don't have to waste energy going back to pick it up.
    ~Tommy Bolt

    Man blames fate for other accidents, but feels personally responsible when he makes a hole in one.
    ~Author Unknown

    I don't say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they'd come up sliced.
    ~Author Unknown

    My handicap? Woods and irons.
    ~Chris Codiroli

    The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flagstick on top.
    ~Pete Dye

    I'm hitting the woods just great -- but having a terrible time getting out of them!
    ~Author Unknown

    If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
    ~Jack Lemmon

    It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
    ~Mark Twain

    Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.
    ~Harry Vardon

    The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie.
    ~George Deukmejian

    Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe.
    ~Author Unknown

    If I hit it right, it's a slice. If I hit it left, it's a hook. If I hit it straight, it's a miracle.
    ~Author Unknown

  2. 4His_glory

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    Jan 11, 2005
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    I am glad to know I am not the only golfer here.

    Boy can I relate to some of those.
    I played a great round yesterday though, to bad it won't happen next time I go out.

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