On the door of a tire store: "Invite us to your next blowout!" On a podiatrist's door: "Time wounds all heels." On a plumber's truck: "We repair what you 'fixed'!" In a non-smoking area: "If we see smoke, we will assume that you are on fire and will take the appropriate action!" On a maternity room door: "Push. Push. Push." On a optometrist's door: "If you don't see what you are looking for, then you are in the right place." On a fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive." At a car dealership: "The best way to get back on you feet?? Miss a car payment." At a muffler shop: "No need to make an appointment. We hear you coming!" At a veterinarian's office: "Be back in five minutes. Sit! Stay!" In the yard of a funeral home: "Please drive carefully. We'll wait." On the back of a septic tank truck: "Caution - this vehicle is full of political promises."