Going Out to Eat After Church

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by saturneptune, Dec 13, 2009.

  1. saturneptune

    saturneptune
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    In the last ten to fifteen years, there have been several members of my family or other young adults I know who were or are waitresses or waiters. Every week, they will argue amongst themselves about who has to work the shift from noon Sunday until close. The reason is that groups of customers who come into restaurants after church are the rudest, most arrogant, demanding, and cheapest tippers among the general population either on that day or any other day.

    At first, I thought it was an exageration, but after hearing it from several people, and seeing it myself quite a few times, it is a real phenomenon. Although a fact, I am at a loss as to understand why. One would think it would be just the opposite, especially in light of being a witness wherever we go. Does anyone have any explanation, or have you experienced this? What waiters do to the food of those who act like this is the subject of another thread.
     
  2. billreber

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    Quite a few years ago, a friend who was a waitress said something similar to me. I prayed about it, and have faithfully (no pun intended) and deliberately tried to be a BETTER customer and a BIGGER tipper since then. I also try to have short discussions about Christ with my servers, but never long enough to cause them to get into trouble. I have made several friends over the years, but do not know if any of the servers I have talked to have accepted Christ as their Savior.

    BTW, I do this on ANY day, too, not just on Sunday! I also try to ask to be seated in the area where Server ABC is when I go back again, because that builds up ABC and allows me to build more of a relationship with ABC, leading to more of a ministry.

    To God be the glory!

    Bill :godisgood:
     
  3. Salty

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  4. matt wade

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    saturneptune, I' m surprised no one has ever let you on to "the plan". "The plan" is to attempt to make it as unworthwhile as possible for these heathens to work on Sunday. If "the plan" works as it should, they will all be attending church rather than trying to satisfy their wordly lust of making money.
     
  5. Aaron

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    If if eat out after church I always do fast food.
     
  6. Marcia

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    Why would they attend church if they see Christians as stingy and rude? I don't think earning a living as a waiter/waitress qualifies for having a worldly lust of making money. It's just a job. And most of their income are the tips.
     
  7. Marcia

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    Yes, I've been told this. One Christian who is a waitress told me, without me bringing up the subject, that Christians were the worst tippers, and waiters and waitresses don't like to get the after church crowd because of this.

    She said sometimes people had even left her a tract instead of a tip! She said it was really sad to see Christians act this way, especially after she was saved. This person lives, btw, in the South where there are lots of churches and professing Christians.
     
  8. Revmitchell

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    20% of the ticket is the appropriate tipping rate for great service. Servers do not make a regular salary as they hourly wage is usually minimum because of tips.
     
  9. abcgrad94

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    I was a waitress as a teenager, and the "church folks" were some of the hardest people to wait on. After that came the parents with young children, smokers, and rude and obnoxious men who seemed to think they were in a bar instead of a restaurant.

    Servers have a certain number of tables. When big groups come in (say 6 or more) you know that they will take much longer to eat. Church folks love to go out to eat, then sit and talk, and talk, and talk, then leave a small tip. They take as much time as two or three smaller groups, but you won't have the tips to show for it because there's no turnover when people just sit talking, taking up your tables. Also, when the customer doesn't like ANYthing, the server's tips shows it. If the cook gets an order wrong, the server loses. If the food is cold because the restaurant is short staffed and the server couldn't get it out fast enough (often true on Sundays) the server loses. If they wait too long, again, the server loses tips. It's unfair for the waitress to lose tips for things she cannot control.

    Another thing about "church folks" is that they take forever just to order. One person at the table orders, then the server stands there waiting and waiting while the rest of the group discusses what would be best to order. While the server stands there waiting, more customers are piling in and getting disgruntled at having to wait for service. Of course they will not tip if they have to wait too long, so the server cannot win.

    I know this is a long post, but there is much more I could say on the subject.
     
  10. Timsings

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    This is a good standard for tipping. I was never a server, but I was a hotel bellman for about three years after college. It may have changed since then, but at that time my pay was 1/2 of minimum wage because I was expected to get tips to cover the difference. I ran into plenty of "stiffs". But, to be fair, I also encountered plenty of people who not only tipped appropriately, but also were very appreciative of work well done. It was a pleasure to work for them.

    We had a company that held their annual meeting in a hotel in Knoxville twice a year. The hotel had to threaten to cancel the meeting because the company would not pay their bill for the previous meeting until the last possible moment. When the people would check in, I would spend my evening delivering extra towels, rollaway beds, TP, etc., and looking for stolen luggage carts. I would make very little money.

    In my experience, the old joke about Baptists checking into a motel with a list of the Ten Commandments in one hand and a $10 bill in the other and their not breaking either one during their stay is not that much of a joke. However, they might break the bill in an out-of-town liquor store. :D

    My daughter started out as a server but is now a sales manager for a nice restaurant. She has come in with plenty of horror stories about large groups with poor tips. That is why so many restaurants add a gratuity to the check for large groups.

    Tim Reynolds
     
  11. Magnetic Poles

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    Working class folks don't often make their own schedules. You work your assigned hours, or you have no job. Trying to feed, clothe, and shelter your family on servers wages is not what I would in any way call a "lust of making money".
     
  12. Amy.G

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    I usually double the sales tax (9.75%) and then round it up. It works out to be about 20%. I do this because I'm so bad at math.

    Without tips servers make practically nothing. I am shocked that Christians are so stingy. I also think it's very important to say please and thank you and make the server feel appreciated.
     
  13. SBCPreacher

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    1. We usually never go out to eat on Sunday. I don't want to be the cause for someone having to work instead of being in church. We are a rare family - we usually ALL sit around the dinner table together on Sundays!

    2. When we do go out to eat, I'm a pleasant customer and a good tipper. I believe it reflects poorly on my Savior if I'm not.
     
  14. saturneptune

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    This is not an imaginary situation, and it appears to be nationwide. What is the common thread here? Why is it when a group of Christians are put in this setting, especially right after a service, this kind of attitude emerges, just exactly the opposite of what is should be?
     
  15. abcgrad94

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    To be perfectly fair, it's not just Christians. I think part of the problem is just plain ignorance. People don't realize that servers make less than minimum wage since their employers expect them to "earn" part of that wage in tips. They don't realize they are being rude when they sit for hours, talking, while the server cannot get more tips because there is no turnover in customers. To be honest, I never thought about it until I became a waitress.

    The good news is we can easily solve the problem by tipping our waiters properly and by being respectful of how much time we are taking. Youth pastors, especially, should instruct their messy teenagers to leave tips if they are eating out while on a church outing. It is absolute torture to wait on a big youth group of teens and find nothing, or very little, as a tip. Men who meet for morning prayer breakfasts should leave a very generous tip if they take over an hour sitting at the table. Parents of young children should also leave a good tip, especially if the server has the added work of dealing with high chairs, booster seats, and all the extra crumbs and mess left to wipe up.

    Also realize that the cooks basically stick to the grills, while the servers may be expected to make salads, slice pies, answer the phone, run the cash register, clean ash trays, dip ice cream or make milk shakes. It may seem easy to watch, but those extra duties take time, especially if people order ice cream sundaes with many toppings. So be patient. When ordering, speak up so the server can actually hear you above the din of the restaurant, and don't change your mind 10 times about what you want to order. Limit her trips back and forth to the table. For example, if one person needs a refill, see if anyone else needs one so the waiter can do it all in one trip.
     
  16. Marcia

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    I almost don't want to think why it's this way because the answers might be depressing. :(

    If a group stays at a table a long time after they eat, they should pay over the normal tip! I've been with groups that do this, but someone has to speak up and say, "Look, we've been at this table for 2 hrs.; let's leave some extra beyond the tip."

    A waiter/waitress is doing an honest job; most of their income is in tips; all our money is the Lord's anyway, so let's not be stingy on tips!
     
  17. SolaSaint

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    AMEN :wavey::wavey:

    You set a good example I wish we all would follow. If we would settle for Mom's fried chicken or roast beef at home like we used to, then maybe there wouldn't have to be many working as waitresses on Sundays. It also would get our families closer together IMO. I'm going to make a conscious effort to eat at home from now on.
     
  18. matt wade

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    Marcia and Magnetic Poles, take a deep breath....it was a joke :).
     
  19. Edward 1689er

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    While I realize that this thread is about being a good tipper on Sunday, May I suggest that Christians should NOT eat out on the Lord's Day. You are actively supporting with your hard earned money, folks to work on Sunday and thus violate the Christian Sabbath. :jesus:
     
  20. Salty

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    Many on this board believes the Sabbath is still Saturday - and we worship on the Lord's Day -

    Just today, after service we went to Denny's for lunch. As the waitress brought our meal to the table, I said "Mam'n we are going to say grace for our meal, is there anything you would like us to pray for?" She asked us to pray for her as her husband just died a few months ago. In additon to a nice tip, we left a Bible tract and my business card. How I praise the Lord that we went to the restaurant today (Sunday!)

    Please pray for Doreen.

    Pastor Salty
     

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