Does the bible itself make any statements on how it's supposed to work? I mean if the bible works like an instructional book with warnings and prohibitions which the christians read and memorize and then recall in the situations where they are needed then where exactly is the supernatural part in this? Then it's not the Holy Spirit who does the work and who causes the change, then it's simply the people which learn, memorize and later on apply the stuff which they read. Where is the difference between this and the quran? The muslims can do exactly the same. They can also read and memorize what's good and bad and then apply it. I think this stinks. If it's all about me and if I have to cause all the changes then what's it worth? Where is the supernatural part in this? I want to see God do something. I don't want to struggle and try to sculpture myself. If the bible is all about simply learning rules and guidelines and then applying them then there is nothing supernatural at all. I thought that there is also a supernatural part where God simply changes you without you doing anything. But I cannot see this on myself. I struggle with the same stuff I have always struggled with. There is no miraculous victory. The only difference is that I'm more aware of my sins but there is no change. Where is the sense of always feeling bad and still not being able to change it? This is simply frustrating. And then the bible talks about having died to sin and all this stuff. I don't know what to think about this. Basically I can either be dragged down by it because I'm not dead to sin or I can simply try to give it a different meaning or to relativize it but if I relativize it then it becomes nothing more than a phrase. Something which you read and which sounds good and then you think: "Yes, but in reality it's totally different..." This is so frustrating. I wish I could see some changes but I don't. And this also makes me insecure and makes me doubt everything because when I don't really see changes which I can say are clearly from God then I can question everything and think that maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm simply on a religious trip but the real power of the gospel which is supposed to really change the people isn't there. This makes everything look so ineffective and weak. What if I simply can't improve anymore? What do I do then?