How should Christian parents handle this

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by freeatlast, Jan 10, 2012.

  1. freeatlast

    freeatlast
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2004
    Messages:
    10,295
    Likes Received:
    0
    This is not far fetched or uncommon today. How should this be handled by the parents?
    You are Christian parents and you have a child who grows into young adult hood. This child moves out and gets into a relationship with someone of the same gender. They move in together and live as a couple.
    Would you allow your child to bring this person to your home for the holiday's or any time for that matter? Keep in mind that they would carry on just like any two people who were a couple male and female living together with the occasional touching and kissing.
    How would you handle this?
     
  2. Christos doulos

    Christos doulos
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2011
    Messages:
    320
    Likes Received:
    0
    You should love your child no matter what.

    I would never touch and kiss my girlfriend in front of my parents nor would I be able to share the same room with her. The same rules would apply to my children as well regardless of their sexual orientation.

    Allowing my child's friend to come over for the holidays in no way demonstrates support for their relationship only the love for my child.
     
  3. annsni

    annsni
    Expand Collapse
    Administrator
    Administrator

    Joined:
    May 30, 2006
    Messages:
    20,138
    Likes Received:
    364
    I would love my child but have boundaries.

    How would I respond if my child were a drug addict and she wanted to bring the drugs over and use them when in my home? Same answer.
     
  4. freeatlast

    freeatlast
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2004
    Messages:
    10,295
    Likes Received:
    0
    Now we agree! :thumbs:
     
  5. glfredrick

    glfredrick
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 5, 2010
    Messages:
    4,996
    Likes Received:
    0
    I agree with above...

    Love trumps sin, but with boundaries.

    We cannot even begin to start the process of redemption and restoration until we first forgive, then act on that forgiveness. As we are to be ambassadors of reconciliation and ministers of peace, I would suggest that we learn agape love for the individual while standing firm concerning their sin.
     
  6. Christos doulos

    Christos doulos
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2011
    Messages:
    320
    Likes Received:
    0
    My friend. Do you think the drug parallel is fair?
     
  7. padredurand

    padredurand
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2004
    Messages:
    4,384
    Likes Received:
    20
    Part of me wanted to scream, froth at the mouth, jump up and down and have a full blown hissy fit. Part of me wanted to pull out the Book and use it as a hammer and pound the Truth into her. Part of me pulled her close and said, "I love you. You will always be my daughter."

    Trust me. This ain't no 10 minute fix.
     
    #7 padredurand, Jan 10, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 10, 2012
  8. jbh28

    jbh28
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2008
    Messages:
    3,761
    Likes Received:
    0
    I would seek the advice of others in my church. One possible answer could be to invite the child over, but not the other person. Of course this is a difficult situation with a lot things that have to be looked at.

    Why wouldn't it be? Being hooked on drugs is sin. Being in a homosexual relationship is sin.
     
  9. Christos doulos

    Christos doulos
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2011
    Messages:
    320
    Likes Received:
    0
    I have no doubt homosexuality is a sin but drugs are dangerous, harmful, illegal etc....
     
  10. Mexdeaf

    Mexdeaf
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2005
    Messages:
    7,051
    Likes Received:
    0
    Best and most honest answer yet. You must have been there.
     
  11. DaChaser1

    DaChaser1
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2011
    Messages:
    2,324
    Likes Received:
    0
    Would it make any difference IF it was we who were the ones to go over to their home to visit?

    or same answer, never meet with the two of them, as that might appear to 'sanction" their relationship?

    As I would tend to see that my wife and I could go over to their place, as we need to stay in touch with my child?
     
  12. freeatlast

    freeatlast
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2004
    Messages:
    10,295
    Likes Received:
    0
    Yes I think any parallel is fair. For instance let's use profanity. I certainly would not allow a child to use profanity in my home or around me and they would be taught it is sin growing up. If they left and picked that up I would confront them about it and if they did not want to comply with my standards while viviting my home I would not stop loving them, but because of the love, my standards would remain and they could not come to my home and use the profanity.
    The same with ANY sin. Out of love I would confront, speak the truth to them and the ground rules is one of Christ like behavior or they would not be allowed to come.
     
  13. freeatlast

    freeatlast
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2004
    Messages:
    10,295
    Likes Received:
    0
    It is not about fixing them. It is about would you compromise truth and standards above the Lord for their sinful ways?
     
  14. freeatlast

    freeatlast
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2004
    Messages:
    10,295
    Likes Received:
    0
    Alcohol is a drug. I would not permit them to bring alcohol and that drug is legal.
     
  15. freeatlast

    freeatlast
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2004
    Messages:
    10,295
    Likes Received:
    0
    glfredrick can answer for himself but for me it would be no different. If you made exceptions then you confuse the issue. You are saying the problem is not your sinful ways but where we meet.
    In a previous post I used profanity as another example. I would not visit with them even in their own home if profanity was their new way to speak around me.
     
    #15 freeatlast, Jan 10, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 10, 2012
  16. padredurand

    padredurand
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2004
    Messages:
    4,384
    Likes Received:
    20
    There is no compromise in love. Nobody said anything about abandoning the faith because of a child's sin. I can't fix her anymore than I can fix myself. That's God's work through the Holy Spirit. What I cannot do is to add alienation to an already strained relationship.

    The relationship between my daughter and I is strained because she knows what I believe and she knows that if forced to choose between she and He that she will be on the outside looking in. I'm not going to be the one to force the choice. Any idiot can rant, rave and quote Scripture. It takes character to love.

    It wasn't that long ago when I looked to my Heavenly Father like she looks to her earthly one. Grace.

    I was sinking deep in sin, far from the peaceful shore,
    Very deeply stained within, sinking to rise no more,
    But the Master of the sea heard my despairing cry,
    From the waters lifted me, now safe am I.


    Love lifted me!
    Love lifted me!
    When nothing else could help,
    Love lifted me!
     
  17. annsni

    annsni
    Expand Collapse
    Administrator
    Administrator

    Joined:
    May 30, 2006
    Messages:
    20,138
    Likes Received:
    364
    I hear trumpets. Is that the clouds parting?????

    :smilewinkgrin:
     
  18. freeatlast

    freeatlast
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2004
    Messages:
    10,295
    Likes Received:
    0
    I was thinking on the same line. Just Shocking! :laugh:
     
  19. Scarlett O.

    Scarlett O.
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 22, 2002
    Messages:
    9,833
    Likes Received:
    114
    While it's certainly a good things for Christians to discuss possible events like this, there is no way and no how that anyone can say with assurance exactly what they would or would not do until met with such circumstances.
     
  20. freeatlast

    freeatlast
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2004
    Messages:
    10,295
    Likes Received:
    0
    You have chosen the way you want to travel. However for me I seek to travel a road that the scriptures seem to suggest. I do understand your disgust with scripture quoting as I see that disgust towards them in many today. However for me I am nothing without them. They are my delight and what I seek after to understand the Lord I serve and seek diligently to live out what they teach.
    Out of love if my child wanted to bring their sin into my house they would not be permitted. I believe that is how God operates and since He is my example I would follow in the same.
    That does not mean my child could not come home or that they would be outcasts, just that they could not bring their sin with them as I assume you are suggesting you permit. And yes they would have to choose on those grounds.
     
    #20 freeatlast, Jan 10, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 10, 2012

Share This Page

Loading...