I Give Up, I'm Going to Run For President

Discussion in 'Politics' started by Major B, Sep 25, 2008.

  1. Major B

    Major B
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    I hereby announce my candidacy for President of the United States.

    Education:
    B.A. (History and Social Sciences) Thomas Edison College
    M.S. (International Relations) Troy State University, European Campus
    M.A. (Religion) Liberty Baptist Theological Seminary.
    National Board Certified Teacher of History

    Experience:

    1. Military--20 + years, enlisted as an Airman Basic and came up through the ranks to Major. Qualified crash investigator (might come in handy now), aircraft maintenance officer, logistics manager. Worked the Logistics desk for Europe while stationed at HQ 21st AF, implemented the INF treaty.

    2. Industry--factory maintenance manager

    3. Pastoral--one pastorate, one interim pastorate, plus 8 years of pastoral counseling experience.

    Considered to be an excellent public speaker.

    Family--three adult children, all married, none in jail currently, three grandkids so far.

    Platform.

    1. Honesty--call it the no-bull Bulletin. I will say what I mean and mean what I say.

    2. Constitutionality--it means we will do what it says. I will ask congress to invoke their power, which has never been used, to limit the jurisdiction of the Supreme Court to matters of interpretation and not allow the court to legislate anything.

    From Article III "...In all cases affecting ambassadors, other public ministers and consuls, and those in which a state shall be a party, the supreme court shall have original jurisdiction. In all the other cases before-mentioned, the supreme court shall have appellate jurisdiction, both as to law and fact, with such exceptions, and under such regulations as the Congress shall make. .."

    3. Security--will transition the Defense Department back into the WAR Department. Will not seek to pre-empt anyone, but if anyone crosses us, I will make an example of them that will never be forgotten.

    4. Israel--If anyone messes with Israel, they can handle it. If they need a hand, we will be there for them, because I have read the Abrahamic Covenant--Gen 12:1-3

    5. Economics--free enterprise, with the government acting as the referee. If an executive of a firm runs it in the ground, he won't get a golden parachute, or any parachute at all.

    6. Social Issues.

    a. Marriage is between one male human and one female human, period.
    b. Abortion is murder, we will seek to outlaw it except when the mother's life is in danger.
    c. Gays have the same rights as everyone else already--they don't get any special ones just for them.
    d. Every murder or beating is a hate crime--Duh!

    7. Education

    a. abolish teacher's unions
    b. employ only teachers that actually know something about their subject
    c. Back teachers up with a discipline policy that has teeth, and remove troublemakers from the classroom
    d. Use the educational principles which got us to the moon--rigor, knowledge, hard work.

    Skeletons in my closet.

    I am a Calvinist--but can't do anything about that...

    I once smoked oregano in college

    I have a normal and very happy relationship with my only wife who was also my high school sweetheart. Well, some folks think that is a skeleton.

    I have no money to run for office--so let's kick in some.
     
  2. Revmitchell

    Revmitchell
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    Well we will see if you were predestined to be President before the foundation of the world. :laugh:
     
  3. Bro. Curtis

    Bro. Curtis
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    Have you thought about local office ? There are several places in America looking to replace local crooked Dem leaders....
     
  4. TomVols

    TomVols
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    Major, you're a Man of God, a minister of the Gospel. Don't take a demotion to be a politician :thumbs:
     
  5. KenH

    KenH
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    Amen. :thumbs:
     
  6. LeBuick

    LeBuick
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    Can I be your make up guy?
     
  7. Major B

    Major B
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    That depends... How good are you with bondo and fiberglass repairs? Can you make my beady little eyes look better?
     
  8. Major B

    Major B
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    Well, my wife has retired me from the ministry. If ever I even candidate at a church, she is going to hit me three ways, (hard, fast, and constantly) with her cane.
     
  9. Salty

    Salty
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    If I become you campaign manger, will you make me secretary of defense?

    Sarge Salty
    NY Guard, Ret
     
  10. Major B

    Major B
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    I will make you a security guy. My Secretary of War will be David Petraeus.
     
  11. LeBuick

    LeBuick
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    I saw the clip once at home depot and I do have a good sander... :thumbs:

    Yep, I can step on your toes and make your eyes real big...
     
  12. EdSutton

    EdSutton
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    President James A. Garfield (who was a minister) said he was resigning the highest office in the land to become the President of the United States.

    Ed
     
  13. LeBuick

    LeBuick
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    Now there's a good Christian man... Didn't know that about Garfield.
     
  14. Major B

    Major B
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    Well, he did not last long--assassinated by a disgruntled would-be federal employee.
     
  15. LeBuick

    LeBuick
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    Well, at least he had good life insurance... :laugh: :jesus: :thumbs:
     
  16. NaasPreacher (C4K)

    NaasPreacher (C4K)
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    That's neat - I would like to learn more. I thought he had been serving in the US House since he left the Army during the Civil War.
     

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