First, let me say this is something that is burdening me for personal reasons as there are about 4 young couples in my church who are embracing Calvinism. They are TERRIFIC young couples deeply entrenched in faith and evangelism and I love them very much. Two of the couples have children and the others eventually will. There is something that I would like to talk to them about, but I am afraid of offending them, so I must take the coward's way out and bring the question here. I'd like to interject the question, not to stir up anything, but because I really would like to understand. First, here is my understanding of the doctrines of grace and Calvinism. I've copied and pasted this from a Calvinistic site. The parts in red are the parts I cannot adhere to according to the totality of the scripture. If all of mankind is being punished for the sins of Adam and Eve and are born "punished", then why would God punish them further by never loving them and never offering them the gift of His grace? The reprobates are punished twice, it would seem according to Calvinism. The are punished merely BY being born. They are born destined for hell because of Adam and Eve and predestined for hell because they are the non-elect or the reprobates. And they are punished FOR being born this way because when they die they will spend an eternity in hell for something that was pre-ordained for them to do. In other words, they were predestined to be born a punished reprobate and to be punished for all eternity for being born punished. That makes no sense to me. It doesn't even fit with something as elementary as John 3:16 nor the Great Commission. If it's true that God will refuse to save the reprobates or the majority of the world and will only save the "elect" or the minority, then why would one bring a child into the world? To me, it would be like play Russian roulette, with your child's soul. The odds are, Calvinistically speaking, that the child born will be a reprobate and doomed for hell no matter WHAT the "elect" parent does to raise the child in the Christian faith. Wouldn't someone who considers himself to be a member of the elect do a much GREATER good in adopting children that are already born and not taking the chance on bringing another reprobate into the world? This is something that I cannot reconcile with the Bible. I would truly like a sincere answer from anyone who calls himself or herself a Calvinist as to how they reconciled their beliefs about the predestined elect and the unfortunate pre-destined hell-bound-from-birth reprobates with their decision on having their own biological children. I am not looking to debate anyone and am not looking for a fight. I will NOT fight. I just am burdened and need an answer.