If a man came to your church.....

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by Salty, Feb 2, 2014.

  1. Salty

    Salty
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    This is not a facetious thread. This morning in SS, we discussed how we would treat those who do not fit our "norm" ie extremly long hair on men, womens lack of clothing, ect.

    So if a man came to your church- wearing a skirt; how would he be treated.
     
  2. Earth Wind and Fire

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    A kilt perhaps?!? That has happened....in fact it was the Pastor.
     
  3. prophet

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    If it goes to his knee, it is traditionally a man's garment, anyway.
    if it goes to his ankle, he is an abomination.
     
  4. agedman

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    It would depend if he spoke with an Irish or Scotch brogue. :)

    Actually, if one showed up in drag, I would expect that assembly treat that person as one needing to be ministered too as an unbeliever, or one who a believer shackled in a sinful life style.

    It would also be wise to have a "minder" with that person. A "wise counselor" who would "friend" the person, sit with them during the service, point out the bathrooms, and discuss various interests of that person that the person be open to both the gospel and the ministering.
     
  5. Earth Wind and Fire

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    Would that also include high heels? :laugh:
     
  6. Yeshua1

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    Depends if he was Scottish or not! A kilt acceptable, not the dress though!
     
  7. JohnDeereFan

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    I would have one of the ladies pull him aside and discreetly mention to him that if he's going to wear a skirt, he should shave his legs.

    Then, I'd introduce myself, welcome him, and share the Gospel with him.
     
  8. Revmitchell

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    If he was a cross dresser he would be welcomes but asked if he returns to have some clothes befitting a man.
     
  9. Jon-Marc

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    I once read about a pastor who dressed like a bum, strung booze bottles and cigarette butts by the front door of the church, and lay there where the people had to step around or over him. No one spoke to him but ignored him and went in and took a seat.

    They sat there wondering where the pastor was. A few minutes later, the "bum" walked in and walked up to the pulpit and revealed who he really was; it was the pastor. His message that morning was about judging and condemning and not helping the down trodden. I'm sure his visual illustration hit some hearts that day.

    I've grown my hair down to my shoulders and like it that way--except that it's difficult to keep it out of my face. At one church, I had long hair when I started there, and no one said anything to me until AFTER I decided to cut it. The pastor and one other said, "Your hair looks a lot better." I took that to mean they didn't like the way it was before but refrained from saying anything.

    Yes, the Bible speaks against long hair on men, but what exactly is "long" hair? My hair is naturally curly, although it's lost most of the curl. At nearly 68, I'm just thankful to have hair. I don't believe in the old saying that "Bald is beautiful."

    As for how someone is dressed when they come to church services, I suppose it would depend on HOW they're dressed. All I know is that men should dress as men, and women should dress as women. Still, that changes according to one's outlook on what is or is not appropriate. We, of course, always need to go by God's words, but it's not always clear in black and white as to what is appropriate in some matters. Of course, for Christians, we are (or should be) led by the Holy Spirit and not by our personal beliefs or preferences.
     
  10. Crabtownboy

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    Would you mind a robe? After all Jesus wore a robe ... he was never in a suit and tie.
     
  11. Crabtownboy

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    No problem. Let him without sin cast the first stone. After all a man wearing a skirt needs Christ as much as a man wearing trousers, a kilt, bluejeans, etc.

    Of course, it could be because of the culture he is from.

    Lots to take into consideration.

     
  12. Yeshua1

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    Good answer!

    Assuming same answer would be given if person was a transgender person?
     
  13. convicted1

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    You misquoted that. Jesus said "let he who is without sin, first cast a stone at her". Major difference.
     
  14. convicted1

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    First off, I'd venture a guess that if a man came to church adorned that way, he'd have an alterior motive, imo.

    TBS, I'd welcome him with open arms and pray that God's gospel be preached to him.
     
  15. Crabtownboy

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    Do you believe that verse applies only about women? Remember he also said, "Do to others as you would have them do to you."
     
  16. JamesL

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    This reminds me of a scenario I was in a few years ago. I was working for a friend of mine (a believer), and happened to be at his house one Friday night just hanging out. A coworker, who had become a friend of mine and an in-law of my boss, came through the front door

    Picture your average sitcom, where people just barge in unannounced

    My back was to the guy, but I recognized his voice when he said "What's up, everybody?"

    While my back was still to him, I said, "Man, what you been up to?"

    I turned around and just about died. This guy, a 50-something black man, was dressed in tight, red leather pants, a frilly flowered blouse, high heels, auburn wig and big clip-on earrings and red lipstick

    Mind you, this is a friend. We had been working together for several months remodeling some apartments. Construction workers.

    Inside, I wanted to scream, laugh, cry, slap him, whatever you can think of. But outside, I never batted an eyelash. I told him it looked like he was geared up for a night out on the town, and we chatted for a few minutes before he disappeared into the evening.

    After he left, I asked my buddy/boss, "What the heck was that?"

    I then got some of the rest of the story. This friend had been in prison for 25 years for something really stupid he did in his 20s. He had been turned into someone's girlfriend in prison, and for years had been abused there by several men.

    When he got out of prison, he was really struggling to make an adjustment to a normal life. He had no other parameters from which to live, except for confinement, and being some man's girlfriend. He felt trapped in his framework, and it wasn't going to be easy to come out of that enslaved mindset.

    Did he need Christ? yes.
    But I'll tell you what he didn't need is some reaction of shock, or someone trying to get him into something more fitting for a man.

    That outward manifestation was only the fruit of being simply wrecked inside. And feeling wrecked inside, the last thing in the world he needs is someone telling him to dress like a man before he comes back.

    That only tells him that he can't come around us until he's like us. And he knows he's not like us on the inside, so you won't ever see that guy again. No amount of menswear is going to undo what that guy feels like inside.

    If that guy came to church, it's because he thinks he can find something there. He's either being antagonistic and looking for a reaction, or he's there because he needs help and hopes he can find it there

    If a guy came into my church wearing a dress, I would probably intentionally go sit next to him, engage in conversation, and just might ask him to go out to a public place to eat lunch after church.

    It wouldn't be because I'm accepting of the behavior, but because he's sick inside, and needs to meet the Great Physician.

    I'm reminded of Romans 1:18, that the wrath of God is revealed against people suppress the truth in unrighteousness.

    Engaging in unrighteousness is what helps men suppress the truth. If you send him away to get himself cleaned up first, then you've sent him away without the truth. At that point, his only friend is unrighteousness.
     
  17. Earth Wind and Fire

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    Hmmmm, of course you are right but that would be hard for me to see past. I will have to think on it & pray about it that I could see Christ in that type of situation.
     
  18. Zaac

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    It depends on how tight the skirt is. If it's really tight and revealing Baptists are usually okay. [​IMG]

    Now if he's wearing a loose skirt just to be wearing a skirt and no one gets to partake of his figure, then we're not having that. [​IMG]

    We once did what the pastor did. I went to a makeup artist and was made up to look like a really old, homeless man. I rolled around in some trash and mud before hiding out in the woods near church. I made my way across the parking lot , stench and all,so a lot of folks could see me coming. I was actually treaed quite well.
     
  19. convicted1

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    Very good post.....
     
  20. prophet

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    Yes, of course He did, why, you even have a picture of Him in your Catholic family Bible,...you know, right after the one of naked baby angels.
     

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