1. Welcome to Baptist Board, a friendly forum to discuss the Baptist Faith in a friendly surrounding.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to all the features that our community has to offer.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon and God Bless!

Immorality in Ministry

Discussion in 'Pastoral Ministries' started by Victorious, Mar 5, 2009.

  1. saturneptune

    saturneptune New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2006
    Messages:
    13,977
    Likes Received:
    2
    How is it that you know there is sin going on? Do you have a remote camera? If the man is living in his bedroom and the woman in her bedroom, what business is it of the church? Just exactly what do you think is going on at age 79 and 75?
     
  2. Victorious

    Victorious Member

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2009
    Messages:
    239
    Likes Received:
    3
    Maybe you should read the earlier posts. That question has already been answered. And yes, when someone is in ministry, it better be the business of the church! I won't even bother to respond to the last question.
     
  3. Pastor Larry

    Pastor Larry <b>Moderator</b>
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    May 4, 2001
    Messages:
    21,763
    Likes Received:
    0
    I think he later said that they had already confirmed the nature of the relationship.
     
  4. gb93433

    gb93433 Active Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2003
    Messages:
    15,549
    Likes Received:
    15
    It sounded like to me that she does not have all of her brain working properly. So I am not sure she even knows what she is doing. According to Eccl. 12 her life is passing before her and she does not know it. Sometimes people appear coherent for a moment but they are not always consistent.
     
  5. annsni

    annsni Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2006
    Messages:
    20,914
    Likes Received:
    706
    Would you ask the same question of a 24 year old man and woman who decided to share an apartment?

    I'm sorry but this is really getting to the heart of "appearance of evil". We won't even let a man and woman be alone in our church without an open door or another man or woman - why is it OK to LIVE together?
     
  6. saturneptune

    saturneptune New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2006
    Messages:
    13,977
    Likes Received:
    2
    It is the business of the church if sin is involved. You saying a relationship exists is no proof. You are not a judge. As far as the last question goes, I could care less if you answer it or not.
     
  7. saturneptune

    saturneptune New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2006
    Messages:
    13,977
    Likes Received:
    2
    Would you pose the same question if a brother and sister were sharing a house? Why is it we always assume that something evil is going on? Why is it not possible for two people to share a house in a sibling relationship?

    I am in no way condoning unBiblical relationships. I have been married to the same woman for several decades.

    It could be in this case the relationship is sinful, but why is that always our first inclination? Remember, church members just got to know, and usually with a 12 foot nose. It is called the joy of gossip.
     
  8. annsni

    annsni Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2006
    Messages:
    20,914
    Likes Received:
    706
    In the vast majority of cases, siblings do not have s3x. However, in the vast majority of cases, a man and woman living together will be intimate - and if not, there is a huge temptation there. Again, in our church, a male pastor will not counsel a woman without another woman in the room - or else the door is left open and it's only done when there are many others in the area. I personally have sat in on counseling sessions as the "chaperone". It's a matter of being wise in this day and age. It's also a matter of living above board and to give no cause for gossip or questions. A man and a woman living together and not married can cause others to question their lives. Are we not to live a life that is worthy of Christ? Is living with a member of the opposite s3x worthy of Christ? If there is a financial need, then the church should step in to assist.

    And just why we should live in such a way that leaves no reason for gossip.
     
  9. Anthony

    Anthony New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2009
    Messages:
    50
    Likes Received:
    0
    The woman told their deacon she was in a physical relationship with the man - I saw that clearly posted.

    God bless
     
  10. righteousdude2

    righteousdude2 Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2007
    Messages:
    11,154
    Likes Received:
    242
    Faith:
    Baptist
    Victorious Should Let Her Read....

    My book: Prodigal Daze.....check out my web site at www.removethehaze.com. If this book doesn't shed light on this sin, nothing will. There is no victory, nor spiritual gain when we give ourself over to the sin of sexual relationships outside of marriage.

    The fact that she has provided the church and community with the appearance of living in sin is enough of a reason to ask her to step down. However, I would recommend that you consider her "mental" state-of-mind and age. Maybe there are family members, or even community mental health agencies that need to be included in your plan of action. Maybe this woman is being taken advantage of: Elder Abuse?

    Please don't just dismiss her, offer her your hand, and any assistance she may need to get her life back to the place of Holiness as the Scripture commands. The problem I had, with my prodigal walk, was I had NO ONE to turn to for advice....I thought I'd be scorned and accused of sin, so chose to live a secret life. This woman has disclosed her possible sin, and that seems to me to be a plea for help, love, and assistance. Try an approach that is completely Biblical, although removing her for sin is Biblical, there is also the need to not drop her in the trash can and leave her to go on her own, expecially after 39 years of faithful service to the church and the Lord!

    I hope my "two cents" helps you, because I know you are searching for an answer that is not an easy one. I can sense your heart is troubled over this, even though you are right, you are troubled. This going beyond a righteous dismissal will be something you can always look back on and know you did what was right and in accordance to the Love we are expected to practice.

    Shalom,

    Pastor Paul:type:
     
  11. Dr.Day

    Dr.Day New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2009
    Messages:
    9
    Likes Received:
    0
    Dr. Day here...thank you for your remarks to my wife...this is a real situation in my Church and I intend to follow through in a biblical manner...but, it will be done in a spirit of love and concern for her spiritual wellbeing, as you have encouraged. This is not an isolated issue within the Church, but one that is effecting all churches accross the board, especially as the baby-boomers cross the aging threshold. However, regardless of the cultural attitudes and economic consequences, the question that this issue raises to those who are involved is, "Who are you serving, Christ or yourself?" Thoses who oppose the righteous moral Christian worldview, also oppose the Word of God as the final authority of truth and life. God Bless you brother.
     
  12. Alive in Christ

    Alive in Christ New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2008
    Messages:
    3,822
    Likes Received:
    1
    Concerning the original situation, why dont they just get married without the state being involved.

    They would be married in Gods eyes...and she still gets her check.


    Problem solved, and she can also keep her church position.


    :godisgood:
     
  13. Dr.Day

    Dr.Day New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2009
    Messages:
    9
    Likes Received:
    0
    She would not receive her benefits and her health is poor. I suspect, as she confessed she did also, that the man would not be as supporting without the $upport. Sad, but true.
     
  14. Pastor Larry

    Pastor Larry <b>Moderator</b>
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    May 4, 2001
    Messages:
    21,763
    Likes Received:
    0
    That could be, or might not be. I don't know.
     
  15. thegospelgeek

    thegospelgeek New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2008
    Messages:
    1,139
    Likes Received:
    0
    Wouldn't that be fraudulent? or at the least very underhanded?

    Is this wise advice?
     
  16. saturneptune

    saturneptune New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2006
    Messages:
    13,977
    Likes Received:
    2
    Speaking of wise, if this situation is true, and if they have the evidence to support their charge, the fact is that is has been so badly handled that it makes one wonder about the Biblical leadership of this church.

    There is a three step process in Matthew for church discipline.
    1. Go to the offending party, and get the person to repent and stop the activity
    2. Take a church member with you, and confront the person
    3. If these fail, take it to the church

    The purpose of church discipline is repentence, correction, and reconciliation.

    The purpose of church discipline is not to splatter it across a message board for literally the entire world to see. This is outrageous. Not that I or anyone with integrity would try to find out who this is, but from the profiles, we know this is a 79 year old organ player at the Chlorine Baptist Church in Arizona. If the pastor and deacons of this church do not have enough leadership and experience to handle this matter within the local church, then advice could have been gotten privately from another local pastor, the association, or, if you just have to get advice from this board, there are private messages. One of the first marks of leadership would have been to keep this matter as private as possible. Now, anyone can see the information, putting this individual up to gossip and ridicule from saved and lost alike, anyone that wants to scan the message board.

    If a pastor or deacon at our church did such a thing, they would be the ones removed from office, and quickly.

    There is no excuse for inept and unBiblical leadership. This is not fair to the individuals involved, nor does it carry out the mandate of Matthew. In fact, it takes this to a circus atmosphere. How could this possibly lead to repentence and restoration? This will take the gossip to new heights.

    Any local New Testement church deserves better than this. This woman is a child of God, and this woman deserves Christ-like restoration. As far as I am concerned, the leadership of this church that allowed this to be posted should be going through church discipline.
     
    #96 saturneptune, Mar 12, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 12, 2009
  17. annsni

    annsni Well-Known Member
    Site Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2006
    Messages:
    20,914
    Likes Received:
    706
    You're telling her to deceive the government for financial gain??????????? You're kidding????
     
  18. thegospelgeek

    thegospelgeek New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2008
    Messages:
    1,139
    Likes Received:
    0
    Valid points.
     
  19. Anthony

    Anthony New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2009
    Messages:
    50
    Likes Received:
    0
    Oddly enough I am on both sides of this dispute.

    The Lord is testing us brethren; let us rise to the test and not give evil for evil.

    The woman came to her congregation for help.
    The OP in turn came to us - is Matthew chuckling and shaking his head at us?
    Hasn't he come to a larger congregation for help?

    Let us help him with all our heart and soul, that we may render a service to God and not judge.

    Have any of you also prayed for a task that we may do his will instead of our own?
    Thank you for answering my prayer Lord, may I prove worthy of your service.

    Praise God

    I will help however I can Victorious, ask for guidance in this.

    God bless you
     
  20. thegospelgeek

    thegospelgeek New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2008
    Messages:
    1,139
    Likes Received:
    0
    Yes, I will help when and where I can.

    Yet as much as I disagree with saturn most of the time, he is spot on in this case. I am sure that victorious has not intended to hurt anyone, but maybe some of the post could/should be edited to insure anoninimity(sp)
     
Loading...