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Is it okay for men to preach if they don't love their wives?

Discussion in '2006 Archive' started by SaggyWoman, Jan 10, 2006.

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  1. FBCPastorsWife

    FBCPastorsWife New Member

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    [​IMG]
     
    #21 FBCPastorsWife, Jan 11, 2006
  2. Scott J

    Scott J Active Member
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    No...

    However.... I know a pastor whose wife threatened to leave him unless he did what she wanted and agreed with her philosophy on how to run a home and raise children. She effectively said that he would submit to her or else explain where she went.

    As best as I could tell, and we were pretty close to them, he was acting out his servant leadership role pretty well but she couldn't be satisfied.

    How would he "treat" her right?
     
    #22 Scott J, Jan 11, 2006
  3. Alcott

    Alcott Well-Known Member
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    That is much the point I was making earlier in a somewhat comical way... if he treats her wrong when she wants to be treated right, or treats her right when she wants to be treated wrong-- the consequence in either case is going to be 'wrong.'
     
    #23 Alcott, Jan 11, 2006
  4. bruren777

    bruren777 New Member

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    NO, NO, NO, men who preach have responsibility to uphold their wives and love and honor them the way Christ loved the church.

    Any preacher who mistreats his wife has to confess his sin, repent, apologize to his wife and God. If he can not do this or has relapses he should get help from a professional.

    If prayer and one on one counseling dosen't work he should consider a sabbatical with even more prayer and counseling.

    After the sabbatical he should find a support group of pastors who have the same problem. They can meet regularly for prayer and discussions and more prayer.
     
    #24 bruren777, Jan 11, 2006
  5. standingfirminChrist

    standingfirminChrist New Member

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    the only problem with the man being wrong 'in any case' is this:

    Genesis 3:16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire [shall be] to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
     
    #25 standingfirminChrist, Jan 11, 2006
  6. Rachel

    Rachel New Member

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    I think churches should have more in-depth study for men on how to be the husband and/or father God wants him to be. There sure are always enough classes for women.
     
    #26 Rachel, Jan 12, 2006
  7. Scarlett O.

    Scarlett O. Moderator
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    This grievous punishment for women found in Genesis is hard to bear sometimes for countless hundreds of thousands of wives and I think that men forget that "ruling over" their wives is not a privilege of "rank" that they earned, but a severe punishment that wives have to bear every day.

    Some wives can't bear it and they behave inappropriately. Some wives can bear it and they are the better for it.

    The ONLY way that wives can bear to be "ruled over" is to be married to a husband who REALLY understands what it means to love his wife.

    A New Testament man who loves his wife the way that Christ loves His bride, the church, would try to emulate Christ in every way possible.

    Just as Jesus Christ came to His bride and took her punishment for her on the cross and thus saved her and made her holy and presentable to God, a Godly husband would do everything in his power to help his wife bear that burden by never making her to feel "punished", but instead making her feel "worthy", as Jesus made the church worthy.

    Being "ruled over" isn't pleasant, guys. It wasn't intended to be pleasant. It was intended to be a punishment.

    Only a man who loves Jesus Christ and submits himself the the Lordship of Jesus can ease that burden on a wife. And a Godly husband would greatly desire for his wife, the woman that he is "one flesh" with, to be so comforted by his gentle and respectful leadership that she would never feel anything but loved, adored, important, holy, needed, and at peace with her role as his wife.

    A REAL man...a real man of God should go into his prayer closet daily and seek God and ask God to reveal to him just exactly how to show and express his love for his wife the way that Christ expressed his love for the church.

    Only God can help a husband to treat his wife "right".

    We could debate it on the BB all day long, but ultimately a husband has to seek out God in understanding what his wife needs from him and understanding how he must make sacrifices, just as Jesus did, to make sure that his wife is truly made into his own holy bride, just as the church is Christ's Holy Bride.
     
    #27 Scarlett O., Jan 12, 2006
  8. IveyLeaguer

    IveyLeaguer New Member

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    Well said, Scarlett.
     
    #28 IveyLeaguer, Jan 12, 2006
  9. SaggyWoman

    SaggyWoman Active Member

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    This question is for SaggyWoman ONLY:

    "Right" is a pretty broad term.

    Did you have some particular action or lack thereof in mind when you asked this question?     </font>[/QUOTE]"Right" means with love.

    "Right" means as you would treat your own body.

    "Right" means as Christ would treat the church.
     
    #29 SaggyWoman, Jan 12, 2006
  10. SaggyWoman

    SaggyWoman Active Member

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    Whoo-hoo!!! [​IMG] Just kidding y'all ;) </font>[/QUOTE]Ooooo, Baby!

    I don't think that some aspects of this is considered abuse..... :rolleyes:
     
    #30 SaggyWoman, Jan 12, 2006
  11. SaggyWoman

    SaggyWoman Active Member

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    Oh, and by the way, treating a woman "right" doesn't mean that if she is being wrong, for the man to give in to her. Rather, it is for him to stand for what is right--being that what is Godly.
     
    #31 SaggyWoman, Jan 12, 2006
  12. IveyLeaguer

    IveyLeaguer New Member

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    Just curious, but are there any more out there where you ladies come from? [​IMG]
     
    #32 IveyLeaguer, Jan 12, 2006
  13. Johnv

    Johnv New Member

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    Preach, or pastor? Anyone can preach. But not everyone can pastor. I'm going to assume your'e referring to holding the office of pastor. I'm sure that, in a lifetimes of marriage, there will be no shortage of times I don't treat my wife right.

    I think the more objective question to ask is: Is it okay for men to be pastors when they sin against their wives? The answer there is, generally, "no".
     
    #33 Johnv, Jan 12, 2006
  14. Salamander

    Salamander New Member

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    Preach, or pastor? Anyone can preach. But not everyone can pastor. I'm going to assume your'e referring to holding the office of pastor. I'm sure that, in a lifetimes of marriage, there will be no shortage of times I don't treat my wife right.

    I think the more objective question to ask is: Is it okay for men to be pastors when they sin against their wives? The answer there is, generally, "no".     </font>[/QUOTE]Yes, b y your estimation even a rooster, a donkey, and a whale can "preach", why even a gourd can "preach", but a man is the only human God calls to hold to the postion of "preacher".

    If a man does not love his wife, he is in disobedince to God's command for husbands to love their wives and be not bitter against them.

    No. A man that doesn't love his wife needs to step down from the position of a preacher and REPENT!
     
    #34 Salamander, Jan 12, 2006
  15. Johnv

    Johnv New Member

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    I'm always amused that you will take every chance to display a condesceding attitude and take potshots at other posters.

    It is obvious that I was referring to people preaching.
     
    #35 Johnv, Jan 12, 2006
  16. TennisNE1

    TennisNE1 Member

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    It is ok for men to preach, (or do anything for that matter) only when women tell them to do so. [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
    #36 TennisNE1, Jan 12, 2006
  17. SaggyWoman

    SaggyWoman Active Member

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    I can appreciate your wisdom.
     
    #37 SaggyWoman, Jan 13, 2006
  18. Blackhawkk

    Blackhawkk New Member

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    What about wives who don't treat their husbands right? Where the wife insists she is right and if the husband disagrees he's "not listening". Then she feels "abused" if the husband doesn't do as she says. When exactly did wives become head of the home as Christ is head of the body?
     
    #38 Blackhawkk, Jan 25, 2006
  19. Craigbythesea

    Craigbythesea Active Member

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    NO!

    [​IMG]
     
    #39 Craigbythesea, Jan 25, 2006
  20. Alcott

    Alcott Well-Known Member
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    No, they have to wait till after... one task at a time, please.
     
    #40 Alcott, Jan 25, 2006
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