Is praying for a mate a selfish prayer?

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by Doeroftheword, Nov 6, 2008.

  1. Doeroftheword

    Doeroftheword
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    Is it selfish to ask God for a Christian Mate in prayer? As a 28 year old Christian male its hard being single with all the temptations and i sometimes wonder if it would be a selfish prayer to ask GOd for a Christian girlfreind. Dont know why but was wondering everyones thoughts
     
  2. StefanM

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    I see no reason why it would be selfish. God desires good things for us. A wife is good for a man!
     
  3. Dale-c

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    I am a 28 year old married male and I am quite happy to be married.

    The only advice I would give you is to pray for God's will.
    By all means pray for a wife but pray for God's direction and wisdom.

    All things work together for Good to the Call according to His purpose.

    Remember also that if your prayers are not answered soon there is a purpose, His purpose.

    God bless and I hope the best for you.
     
  4. canadyjd

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    I went to church with a lady who was committed to remaining faithful to God and remaining unblemished by an intimate relationship outside of marriage. She gave her testimony once in church. She is a music teacher and was well into her 30's and thought God may want her to remain unmarried her entire life, despite her many daily prayers that He would provide a husband for her.

    She then met her current husband, himself a musician, and was thankful to God for giving her the courage of her convictions.

    They went several years and were unable to concieve a child. They were both around 40 when they decided to adopt. As they languished for several years adopting a Phillipine child, she discovered she was pregnant.

    Now they are raising two beautiful children and couldn't be happier.

    So, no, I don't think it is selfish to pray for a mate.

    On the contrary, I think it is wise and God-honoring to trust Him to provide whom He will for you.

    May God bless you soon with answered prayers.

    peace to you:praying:
     
  5. Tom Butler

    Tom Butler
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    Remember when the folks around Jesus asked him why Bartamaeus had been born blind--his sin or that of his parents. Jesus said neither, that he was blind so that Jesus could display his power in him at this moment.

    So Jesus knew that he would heal Bartamaeus. Even so, he made him ask for it. "What do you want?"

    "Lord, I want my sight," said Bartamaeus.

    The point is, don't be afraid to ask for what you desire.

    And, aren't we told to come boldly to the throne of grace?

    Go for it, brother.
     
  6. LeBuick

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    Great advice... :thumbs:
     
  7. Alcott

    Alcott
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    I don't pray for a mate. If I can't put my opponent's king in check with no escape by my own strategy, I don't want any intervention.
     
  8. Jim1999

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    If more people prayed for their mate we would prolly have fewer divorces in Christian circles.

    By all means seek God's will for your life, inlcuding a mate.

    Cheers, and bless,

    Jim
     
  9. North Carolina Tentmaker

    North Carolina Tentmaker
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    Only to the same extent that most of our prayers are selfish. Everything we pray for is selfish to some point. If we did not want something we would not be asking would we?

    I prayed for my wife for years before I met her.

    I always felt like God had a mate for me and I can see that at 28 you might start to doubt that. My prayer was always for that person God had for me, that he would protect her, giver her the strength to endure the trials and temptations of this world, that God himself would provide and care for her like I intended to someday in the future. Before I ever knew who she was or what she looked like I prayed for God’s blessings to fall upon my wife. I usually linked this prayer to prayer for myself, that I would keep myself pure and prepare myself for the day that I would be her husband. That I would know her when the time was right and be prepared to love and trust her when that day came.

    And you know what, it did.

    I remember praying with John R. Rice one time (I was just a kid, here’s to you JoJ). We had prayed for several requests and stuff. He closed his prayer with the statement (best I can remember through the years), “Now God, these are the things we want. Give us the things we want Lord, or change our wanters, change our wanters so that we want the things you want Lord and have your will in our lives.”

    The exact words may have evolved a little in the 30+ years that have passed since I heard him pray that, but I have prayed that same prayer many many times since that day.

    Do you desire a wife, the Bible says that is a good thing. Ask for the desires of your heart. Ask that the Lord grant your desires or that He change your desires so that His will and your will become the same.
     
  10. Martin

    Martin
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    ==Of course not. Make sure you have your focus on the Lord and trust Him to do what is best for you.
     
  11. Alcott

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    My earlier post in this thread was a joke; probably misplaced, as this is not a joking matter. So I will say with seriousness: Praying to find the right person is not selfish as long it is equally complimented by working to be the right person.
     
  12. North Carolina Tentmaker

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    I think most of us got the chess humor Alcott
     
  13. tank1976

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    I am 32 and I am not married. I never have been married either. I also am a minister.

    I can see all sides of this concern. I have been there myself. I am not sure I will ever get married though. That is up to the Lord. I believe if you are praying with a humble heart you are doing what is right.
     
  14. sag38

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    I prayed for a wife for ten years or more. I even tried to help God out a few times. But, He kept me until the time was right. Man, it seemed like a long wait. However, I've been married for almost 13 years now and knowing what I know now I would have waited twenty years. There's nothing like being married to the right person.
     
  15. SaggyWoman

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    You need to pray that you will be ready when you meet your mate.
     
  16. Amy.G

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    Who better than the Lord to find you the perfect mate? Keep praying for His will. :thumbs:
     
  17. ray Marshall

    ray Marshall
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    It is honorable. You pray to GOD that he will send you a help mate of his choosing. If he does, you will be blessed beyond measure.
     
  18. PeterM

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    I guess my response would be... WHY WOULDN'T YOU?!?!?! Your heavenly father wants to hear all of the desires of your heart. He is the single best "Dad" in the universe, so go ahead and ask. He will answer...
     
  19. Carl B

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    I can confirm also that waiting for THE mate for you IS worth it:thumbs: I married my wife Gayla in 1998, 4 1/2 months was all that separated us in age. I know there are more people than I know on this board that knew her. Those who haven't had the pleasure of meeting her online, she lost her long battle with cancer almost 9 weeks ago. With all that I saw her go through she was a trooper till the end, always expecting to get up out of her bed where she spent her last 3 months. We were together a short time, 10 1/2 years. Too short, of course for me 30 years would be too short. I was indeed honored and humbled to have had her as my wife. I look forward to the day I can see her again. I also look forward to the day that God brings me another (not a replacement) angel to spoil me and be a mother to my kids... Yes praying for a christian mate IS very much worth the wait.:thumbs: :praying:

    Sorry, typed longer than I planned..Thats what happens when I think of Gayla...:type:
     
  20. John of Japan

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    Hi, Doeroftheword. Welcome to the BB!

    I don't think it is selfish to pray for a wife. I prayed for mine for 9 years! But it must be for the Lord's glory.

    You can check out how God led my wife and me together here: http://www.johnofjapan.org/articles.php?ID=24
     

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