Married to a catholic... Please Help!

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by brucebaptist, Jun 2, 2008.

  1. brucebaptist

    brucebaptist
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    Hello, I am new to this board. Not sure if this is the place for this type of question or not. I am Baptist and my wife is DEVOUT catholic. She thinks Mary is the co-savior, worships dead saints, loves the pope, prays with rosary beads, and the list goes on. We have 3 small kids and I want them to be Baptist and she wants them to be catholic. It's killing our marriage! Does anyone have any suggestions or websites that can be used to help with this issue? Thx...
     
  2. Revmitchell

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    Pray and fast brother!:praying:
     
  3. nunatak

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    Welcome to the BB. :wavey:
    I noticed on the other thread re: popes visit, you mentioned you were RCC. RevMitchell gives a good answer. And I would add, trust. God is sovereign. Not you, or your wife. Just as he delivered you from darkness, he can deliver your wife in his time. Until he does, his grace will sustain you.
     
  4. Brother Shane

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    It's killing your marriage because you're not supposed to be with her to begin with (II Corinthians 6:14). Do know that you would have no right to divorce under any circumstances, even if she is an unbeliever.. which she is (1 Corinthians 7:12-13). In fact, there are no grounds in the Bible found for divorce. I want to make sure we get that shot across the board before the thought even crosses your mind.

    Pray. Pray! Ask God to humble you.

    You need to stay faithful to your marriage and be a Christian witness. One of the most efficient ways to prove your case that Mary is not "co-saviour" is to ask her for scripture. Tell her that you will not believe otherwise until you have scripture that proves Mary is in companionship with Jesus Christ. Show her the following...

    Exodus 20:4-5 - "Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me"

    Explain to her that Mary would never take part in the above that God tells us not to do. Explain to her that Mary was just the vessel that God used to bring Him forth in the form of man. Ask her what the following verse means...

    1 Timothy 2:5 - "For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus;"

    Your wife uses Mary as a go-between from man and God. She is in blatant violation of the scripture above. Tell her to explain.

    Pull your children aside and show them the Truth. Show them your King James Bible, the authorized Bible. Show them the scripture in how their mother is wrong. But first, show your wife. If she refuses, warn your children. You don't want to send your children to hell by not telling them the truth, but she surely don't want to ruin your marriage.

    I have included a great tract for you to print out for her as well. Show it to her. Tell her you love her and don't want her going to hell. If you need anything else, private message me and I'll be happy to help you.

    http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0040/0040_01.asp

     
  5. I Am Blessed 24

    I Am Blessed 24
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    It used to be that when an 'outsider' married a Catholic, they had to promise to raise the kids Catholic. Does that still hold and did you make that promise?

    Did you know she was Catholic when you married her?

    Were you married in a Catholic or Baptist church? If you were married in a Baptist church or a civil ceremony, the Catholics do not even consider you married...

    It's going to be a real stickler now. These things should be taken care of before the wedding.

    How can you ask her to follow the Bible when you didn't follow it by marrying someone that made you unequally yoked?

    My only suggestion would be to get counseling from your pastor and PRAY, PRAY, PRAY. Get into the Word and study it religiously.

    I will be praying.
    ┬žue
     
  6. Brother Shane

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    Perfectly said Sue.
     
  7. russell55

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    (From what I understand from what this new poster wrote on another thread, he too, used to be a Roman Catholic, so it may be that the comment that he's not supposed to be with her in the first place wouldn't apply. )

    Either way, 1 Corinthians 7 would be the main biblical advice for this situation.

    .
    You need to stay in the marriage as long as she's willing in hopes that you can bring the gospel to her and she will be saved. I'm thinking that by now, she is probably quite clear on what you think about the Catholic church, so continued critical comments probably aren't necessary and only serve to create hard feelings. Positive expressions of your own faith, however, would always be a good thing.

    It's a tricky thing to try to teach your children the truth of the gospel (which you need to do) without trashing your wife. You might want to do a lot of praying for wisdom. :)
     
  8. Magnetic Poles

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    Thus saith the 17 year old marriage counsellor. :laugh:



    Recommending a tract from the anti-Catholic liar, Jack Chick, is hardly sound scriptural counsel.
     
  9. I Am Blessed 24

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    1Ti 4:12 Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.
     
  10. Lynn the Baptist

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    Well there are some really good replies here..interesting...when I got married neither one of us was a Christian..then I was born again 12 years later,and he still hasn't changed.
     
  11. nunatak

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    Written to Timothy.
    Perhaps the issue with his post was one of immaturity? inexperience? using it to substantiate KJVoism?
     
  12. EdSutton

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    I gotta admit, I laughed at this response, myself, for it is an appropriate response, IMO.
    Out of direct context, but this verse still does have an appropriate application here, I believe.
    Does anyone ever ask the question, here, of exactly 'How youthful?'??

    We have simply overloaded this verse with more than it can actually stand, IMO. There is no question that compared to Paul, Barnabas, or Silas (Silvanus), Timothy was a young man. But it is still somewhat relative, considering Paul calls himself an "old man", some 5 years before this, in Phil. 1:9 [ESV, NLT, NCV, NLV, AMP, WE, NIRV, NIV, TNIV; ('elderly man' - HCSB)], where Philemon was written in the early 60's.

    And Timothy is not all that young, as in a teenager or even his early 20s, IMO.

    The first book of which Paul is considered to have been the primary author, at least by most of those whom I consider as reputable conservative scholars, is probably I Thessalonians. It is considered to have been written in the early 50's. FTR, he had two 'co-authors', at that time, namely Silas and Timothy. (I Thess. 1:1) Timothy is also named as a 'co-author' of II Thess., II Cor. (Mid 50's); Col., Phil'p., Philemon, and sent greetings in the book of Romans when it was 'written', by Tertius. (In fact, Timothy is the individual named most often, as a 'co-author', in the "Pauline Epistles", if my memory is correct, hardly a likely job for someone 10-15 years old, I would offer.)

    Likewise, these same sort of scholars believe (as do I) that Paul also wrote I Timothy, and this, in the middle to latter 60's. This is covering a period of some 15 years, folks.

    The 'author' uses the plural forms of "we" and "our" throughout the I Thess. Epistle. Further, the language given in I Thess. 2:7, thusly:
    happens to Biblically identify Silas and Timothy, as well as Paul, as Apostles.

    Timothy was an Apostle, folks, not just some 'Johnny-come-lately' hanger-on, wide-eyed kid, and had been an apostle for at least 15 years, was likely at least some 30 years old, and, again, was not just some brash kid who was not yet dry behind the ears, who didn't even need 'to shave every day', at the time Paul wrote I Timothy.

    No, Paul is speaking of the youth of Timothy, in a relative sense, here, (I Tim. 4:12) just as I often still think of and refer to some of those younger (than I am, by as much as 15-35 years, and even more, in some cases) deacons, teachers, and leaders in my own church as being "young men" when in fact, they are in their late twenties, thirties, and sometimes even forties, and sometimes have been in leadership roles, for which they are well qualified, even, for a decade and far longer, in some instances. Yet, to me, they still seem 'young', considering I will hit 60 in two months.

    I suggest we tend to go 'overboard' suffering from 'proof-text-itis' here, with one single out-of-context phrase, IMO, and we really desire to see Timothy as just "one of the 'kids'". But the whole testimony of Scripture simply says far more, IMO.

    Ed
     
    #12 EdSutton, Jun 2, 2008
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  13. EdSutton

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    For Lynn the Baptist and bruce baptist, Welcome to the BB. '

    And for bruce baptist, I will chime in on the "Pray!" advice, as well.

    Ed
     
  14. Cutter

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    Were you each a member of your respective faiths when you were married. If so, I am surprised that the officiating minister did not warn you about being unequally yoked. Unfortunately we see the fruition of this in the despair of your OP. God have mercy on you.
     
  15. Cutter

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    Luke 2:34 And Simeon blessed them, and said unto Mary his mother, Behold, this [child] is set for the fall and rising again of many in Israel; and for a sign which shall be spoken against;
    35 (Yea, a sword shall pierce through thy own soul also,) that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed.

    Mary's heart would be pierced with the same message that everyone would hear. She was nothing more than a willing, humble servant in fulfilling the will and plan of God.
     
  16. David Lamb

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    That would only be true if he was a Christian (in the biblical sense, of course) at the time of the marriage. If he was not, then as far as I know, there is nothing in scripture that forbids an unbeliever marrying another unbeliever.

    What I am wondering is whether Bruce's pastor knows of his situation (I cannot imagine how he could be ignorant of it), and if so, what advice he (the pastor) has given?
     
    #16 David Lamb, Jun 3, 2008
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  17. pinoybaptist

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    Oh, come on, folks.
    Brother Shane was trying to honestly give what he thought was the right answer. Discussing and pointing out his age is not exactly the mentorlike way of encouraging our young folks. A PM would have sufficed, and a little encouragement would go a great way. Or is it because he is a KJVO and unworthy of respect from his older peers ?

    As for the OP, what I am going to say is not exactly going to be to the liking of the "conventional" and "mainstream" Christian, whether Calvinist or Arminian on this board.

    But, here's what it is.

    God knows all His works from the beginning. He knows who His people are, and when Christ went and died on that cross, the atonement and redemption that was planned in eternity past in heaven became a full realization for all His children at the cross here in time.

    All his children covers those who were not yet born during His short sojourn here on earth, and those who were on earth during that sojourn, wherever they were on this fallen world.

    In other words, you don't know that your wife is not one of God's own, and you don't know that your children are not among God's own.

    What you can do is trust in the Lord, and know that He is good. Be still, and know that I am God. That's what He said in His word.

    I would suggest go to the Bible and read 1 Corinthians:1-17, part of which have already been quoted by one of the posters.

    Basically, what that Scripture is saying is that our unbelieveing children and spouses fall under the same protection and care that we, as God's children, fall under, for as long as we, the believer, remain in the center of God's will.

    And who knows ? The believer may yet save the unbelieving family, not save in the way that Jesus Christ saved us from eternal damnation and the wrath of God, but saved in the sense of being able to obtain the same earthly blessings that worship of the living God affords the redeemed believer instead of the conflicts that arise from falling under the spell of false teachings and doctrines.

    There will be sacrifices, of course, on your part. It is you who will have to make adjustments. It is you who will have to show patience, and kindness, and forebearance. Simply because it is you who are in possession of and have knowledge of the Scriptures.

    In some extreme cases, divorce or separation may come. Painful as it is, such action must not be instituted by yourself. If your wife does go to that extreme, know that you may not marry.

    Again, this will not sit well with many here.

    But I agree with the young man. There simply is to be no more marriage for the believer if an unbelieving spouse departs.

    However, know that the Lord is good, and put your whole trust in Him.
     
    #17 pinoybaptist, Jun 3, 2008
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 3, 2008
  18. Brother Shane

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    First off, Sue, you used the scripture in perfect context. It seems like there is a handful of members here on BaptistBoard that have a problem with a 17-year-old standing up for the old time Biblical foundations.

    Ed, no, I don't ask "how youthful" because we all know that youth is after childhood and we get a perfect understanding of what the scripture means. Take your "overload" mess somewhere else. The scripture speaks clearly that no man should hate or scorn your youth -- such as your faith in Jesus Christ and your knowing in Him. Why even try to justify that scripture?

    Proverbs 1:7 - "The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction."

    PBaptist... somethings never change around here, OK? Really, I personally don't think I'm the "child"...

    And to the rest of you.. he didn't say that he wasn't a Christian when He married during the opening post. He also didn't say that he was filing for divorce either, yet I brought that out too. All he can do now is pray to God for wisdom and strength and talk to her about the truth. He needs to show her the truth, not hide it from her. He needs to act more than on prayer. Perhaps another preacher and He can sit down and have a talk and figure out a plan? There are many things can be tried in this situation.
     
  19. Brother Shane

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    And by the way, how is any marriage supposed to last without the One who designed and created it?
     
  20. pinoybaptist

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    Hey, Brother Shane.
    Chill out.
    If PBaptist means me, I'm on your side. I never said anything about you being the "child", did I ?
    Also, I've been around a while on this board to know that some things do change around here.
     

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