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Discussion in 'Forum for Polls' started by SaggyWoman, Aug 10, 2015.
Do you like your meet and greet time at church?
I do not like it. It seems contrived.
What exactly makes you seem that meet and greet times are contrived?
What's wrong with meeting & greeting people in a corporate church setting, especially if they are out-of-town visitors?
Seems to me that a church would want to welcome new people rather than give them the impression--maybe a false impression--that they don't seem to care that they've decided to visit your services?
If I were to visit a church with which I wasn't familiar, I'd sure want at least a member or two to show that they're glad I visited them.
I could have visited another church that day, but instead I visited yours. That ought to count for something.
In a sense, a good church is one that wants to "sell" their doctrines & practices to someone who chose to visit her services.
I know that might sound a "worldly" to some people, but in a sense, isn't that what Jesus wants His churches to do?
In Acts 1:8, our Risen Savior told His followers [& by extention, us today] to be witnesses everywhere you find people. How does your church "witness" to somebody if that somebody isn't even in attendance at your services?
Maybe meeting & greeting people might seem "contrived" to you, my friend, but not to me.
Please explain how you want your church to "witness" to folks about the things your church has to offer him, his family, & others with whom he is familiar if you don't even welcome him during your corporate services?
I'm really interested in your solution(s).
Yep it is a great time to meet guests and have some fellowship
For the sake of clarity, are we talking about a set-aside time for meeting and greeting new visitors? Or are we talking about the time after service when most everyone stands around for a while talking and catching up with each other?
I believe it is contrived because it does not accomplish what it sets out to do. It is an artificial means to make a connection between people that cannot be done in 30 seconds.
My family and I recently moved down South and we are searching for a church. Two of the churches we have visited do the "meet and greet" thing. Both churches follow the same protocol. The "meet and greet" command is given and then people who know each other shake hands first. One Sunday I sat with some other visitors and we greeted each other before the service began. During the formal "meet and greet" time no one came up to us (and there were plenty of people in the church). Also, I have yet to have one person greet me with, "Hi, my name is [Bob]. What is your name? What brings you to our church this morning? I am glad you are here."
One of the churches we visited has an excellent welcome table in the vestibule. That was where we were able to talk to some church members and learn more about their local church. We were introduced to some folks who we recognized the next time we visited. We sat with a couple we met at the welcome booth. Connection made. Hand shakes during worship service? Not so much.
Reformed hit the nail on the head.
I despise these "required" welcome.
Sure the people around you will say hi - then run off and greet their friends.
Now here is the clincher - that same person who shook my hand - because he had too - does not give me a second look after the service.
Several years ago, I was a radio talk show host. Somehow, one night the subject of friendly churches came up. Several people called up to say they attended a friendly church.
So I decided to take the challenge - Over the next several months, I attended a number of churches. Of the 50 so churches I attended - Only 5 passes the "Friendly Church" test. The sad thing is that all 5 of those churches were extremely liberal.
Sure, in most churches - they were friendly - friendly within their own clicks
There are a lot of things done wrong in churches. Just because "some" do it wrong we should never want it done? Not sure what kind of logic that is.
Instead of saying it shouldn't be done or it should be done away with maybe we could say those "some" churches need to start doing it right.
Excellent point - and a good way is to teach the members to genuinely welcome new guests.
Well you have to actually want new guest first. Those who actually want them will automatically have a desire to welcome them. The truth is that this issue is a symptom and not the actual problem. There is, in our churches, a lack of any real connection with God and the HG. Our churches have lost sight of what real worship is because we have stopped praying as a means of worship. We have no intimacy with God and have become selfish children, telling God "give me this" or "do this for me".
Fix that first and the other symptoms will go away.
Salty's right on this subject.
If a person's not been educated on how to meet & greet a newcomer, he'll either not want to meet & greet them at all, or--worse yet--say or do something that, usually unintentionally, will turn that newcomer off from both himself and the church he's visited.
The leadership of a church needs to educate her members on the proper way to meet & greet newcomers to their churches. It's not something that automatically comes to most members.
In my case, I'm usually very introverted when it comes to dealing with someone about which I have little or no previous acquaintance. It took a pastor to shake me out of my shell and step forward to meet that visitor who came in & sat beside me for worship services.
I'm glad that he did this for me. Now I'm not as reluctant to meet & greet newcomers to our church.
Our pastor has noticed this change in welcoming newcomers such that he suggested I consider joining our "Welcoming Group" who spends a good part of the early part of our corporate worship service greeting newcomers & making sure they have a bulletin & led parents with young children either to our nursery facilities or to where our Children's Church is conducted.
I haven't joined this group yet, but I may do so in the upcoming weeks, probably when our church's Missions Conference occurs later on next month.
I'm sure you wouldn't want to use a physician who's not been educated in the necessary skills to perform his profession, or a mechanic who hasn't been educated on how to fix your car's motor, etc. The same principle applies to training a church's membership in the proper ways to meet & greet newcomers who visit our churches.
forced, contrived, not genuine, cold, phoney are some of the words that run through my head. Kinda feel sorry for those coming up to greet the new person....then you get the question, what do you do for a Living, or where is your wife.....blah, blah, blah. bottom line, not a fan:smilewinkgrin:
a former pastor of a Presbyterian Church I once was a member of was very intuitive. He recognized my wife as having a warm & inviting personality & told her that, "you have a gift, your good with people." subsequently she became a renound greeter & served in that capacity well. Others are just not good at breaking the ice....the key is to recognize this....takes a good eye!
A perfect example of a person who's not[/I been educated in the proper ways to meet & greet a newcomer!
Personally, if I were a newcomer to your church, I wouldn't mind telling him where I work, namely because I've been retired close to 5 years now.
Since I've been single all of my nearly 70 years of my life, I've got a simple answer for those who wonder where my wife is! :thumbs:
Yep, if a church member such as EW&F described approached me like that, I'd gladly tell him as much as he'd care to know about me! :laugh:
I have been members of churches that are like the one that Rev Mitchell has mentioned. There is no desire for evangelism - no true inclination to grow closer to the Lord.
Others will know if we are sincere in while greeting them.
This sounds like a good start for a new thread.
We are considered a small church. We have a greet-one-another time, but I could take or leave it. And I wish it were only 30 seconds. It's more like 2 verses & 2 choruses. The choir also comes down during that time.
I have not heard any complaints in 14+ years of doing it. They person before me did it as well. Occasionally, if we have a lot going on during the service, I might cut the meet and greet or something else like the doxology or number of verses sung for each song.
I realize some visitors don't want to be bum rushed by a bunch of people they don't know. But, coming from a small town, where everyone knows everybody, there aren't too many first time visitors that don't know someone or are related to someone in our church. Our people are very friendly and don't just stop at the greeting time. The continue those conversations after church and into the week. We've had 15+ people join the church over the last several months and seem to like our greeting time.
What I don't like is asking visitors to stand and "tell us a little about yourself." I visited a church years ago that had a reputation of doing that. When they asked for visitors to raise their hands, we did not. :wavey:
Or are we talking about the 1-2 minutes or so at the end of a hymn and before the offering is taken where the worship leader encourages people to greet someone nearby before taking their seat?
I am talking about the time during the service, not before and after.
I think that we should welcome personally before and after the service. I do not believe it needs to be during the service.
Oh. In that case, then I have no dog in this fight. I've never gone to a church that has a set-aside "meet and greet" time during the service.