Featured Men Hitting Women: Why I Can't Tell Them To Stick It Out!

Diamond lady...

I have had that happen to me more then once.

God is Good!

 

Thanks for clarifying why a woman stays with an abuse man, DiamondLady. It makes it much more difficult when everyone is on the abuser's side and blame the victim instead of the abuser.

My experience with divorce is that everyone felt sorry for my ex and treated me like a leper. I was the one who was wrong for divorcing her and making her a "victim".

I knew a woman who stayed with an abusive husband, and then she divorced him once the kids were grown. Having had an abuse dad, I disagree that any father is better than none. Would I have been better off without him? I have no idea, but by the grace of God I turned out fairly normal--whatever normal is. :laugh: Is a woman better off with an abusive man rather than no one? I seriously doubt it.

 

Men: How many are right now forcing themselves to stay in such a situation? How many of our daughters will we put through such a personal hell as this before we wake up? This scenario is being played out every minute of every day for the very same "reasons"? Are we even listening? Men? Fathers? Pastors? Husbands? Brothers?

 

Dr. Paige Patterson explains it all here:

Bible Conference audio
The following starts @ 2:55

Paige counsels a battered wife to stay and pray.
Wife shows up to church with black eyes.
Paige tells her, "Sorry about that but I am very happy."
Why? He saw the husband sneaking in, first time he had been there.
When Paige did an altar call, the husband walked the aisle.

And that was that.

 

I began another thread with your url. Turns out it is about 12 years old. I found some more recent information concerning the SBC's official Statement. I thought a public apology was in order. I started winding up on them in public...

http://cryingoutforjustice.wordpress.com/tag/southern-baptist-convention/

 

That blog has nothing to do with an official position of Patterson or the SBC.
It is a non-SBC pastor's blog and statement.

 

I've seen lots of women stay. Sometimes it's easier to stay with what you know than take that step into the unknown, especially if self-esteem is low and there's no known way to support themselves. I'm not quite that type...I grew up with older brothers and we played rough. Plus I bite. LOL No staying with abusers gonna happen here! Trying to fix the marriage? Sure. Give it a timeline though and no reason to stay in the same home while doing so. I don't advocate divorce for that, but many abusers, when they find themselves alone, won't put forth the effort and will find another person to abuse, thus cheating on the Biblical spouse and giving a proper cause for divorce.

What seems just as bad about abuse is how many women get away with this and how much more prevalent it seems for women to hit their husbands, and not in self defense. I'll never forget how appalled I was when I was babysitting a little one and just returning her to her daddy's place. He was newly divorced and wifey showed up deciding she wanted to come in the house and talk to him. He said no and she tried to shove her way in. It got real weird real fast. I'm standing back holding the baby, she keeps backing up and running into him as he stood in the doorway to stop her from going in and she kept punching him each time then trying it again, finally he put out his hand and pushed her and she fell on her rear, got up, and started clawing at him with her nails. I somehow got the baby inside and stepped back outside and got her off him (he refused to hit her and she was going off on him) so she'd quit hurting him, giving him time to get inside, lock the door, and call the police. After I got her outside, she clawed up her face and arms, then when the police got there, she said he did that to her and the DAD got hauled off in handcuffs despite me trying to tell them he did NOTHING. But hey, he's a guy, and guys don't get abused, right?