No Greater Joy Ministry

I've done extensive research on the Pearls and their books (I have Created to be His Helpmeet and To Train Up a Child right next to my computer) and I can safely say that I will never recommend them AND I will be absolutely vocal against them.

They are not Baptist - and their theology is messed up. In his series on Romans, Michael Pearl says that he's the ONLY pastor who teaches the truth on the subject of sin (from Romans 9) and that even the 20-30 commentaries he's read teaches error on this. He states that he lives in sinless perfection (which, if you read the CTBHHM, he's not) and that all believers should. He also does not believe in being born with original sin or with a sin nature.

The Helpmeet book was my project last summer. I can sum up the entire book for you right here: If anything is wrong in your marriage, it's the woman's fault. Even if a man is into porn, it's the woman's fault. If he's angry, it's the woman's fault. If the wife will change her ways, they can have what they call a "heavenly marriage".

In the Train up a Child book, he advocates setting your child up to failure through temptation and says that it's right to do it because God Himself tempted Adam and Eve by putting the tree in the middle of the garden where they saw it day in and day out. His advocating spanking a few month old is abuse pure and simple.

Here are a few sites that I've saved with some good information. I was going to write a huge review on the Created to be His Helpmeet but this blog said exactly what I was going to say: http://createdtobehelpmeet.blogspot.com/

Here are other sites with good info:

http://allthings2all.blogspot.com/2005/09/michael-and-debi-pearls-no-greater-joy_30.html
(Not into David Cloud but he has good points) http://www.wayoflife.org/fbns/awarning-nogreaterjoy.html
http://allthings2all.blogspot.com/2005/07/review-to-train-up-child-by-michael.html
(look down the page for a chapter by chapter review) http://razorbackmama.blogspot.com/

 

LOL - When I told DH that the basic premise of the book is that it's all the woman's fault, he asked "What's wrong with that??"

Yeah - he slept on the couch that night. Chateau Bow-Wow!

 

I honestly cannot see how anyone can think that there is anything redeeming in the Helpmeet book at all. I have it on my lap right now and I will type some exerpts:

On page 24 in a box speaking of the word "help meet" (which they make into 2 words as the KJV has it although in the Hebrew, it's just one word) and she states that it occurs just twice in the OT in Genesis 2:18 and 20. She says "...Eve was created to be a helper (noun) who was meet (adjective) , suited to Adam's needs." OK - so now she's no longer looking at what the word was (help meet is azer in the Hebrew and is a noun. She then goes on to say right after that "The New Testament use of the word meet throws some light on this word: Acts 26:20, Romans 1:27, 1 Corinthians 15:9, 16:4, Phil. 1:7, Col. 1:12, II Thes. 1:3, II Tim. 2:21, Heb. 6:7, II Pet. 1:13. I encourage you to look up these verses. You will be enlightened as to your position before God as a helper "meet" for your man." Which is all nice and good but since the original Hebrew doesn't contain the word "meet" as an adjective, then this is pretty bad study methods AND she's leading women astray as a "Titus 2 Woman"

On page 27, she is telling the story of a couple she sees at the store. She describes the woman in this way: "The strange thing was that this woman was ugly, I mean, hillbilly ugly, which is worse than regular ugly." She continually uses this tactic to describe women - in very unChrist-like derogatory terms.

On page 29 in a response to a woman who's husband is having an emotional affair, she states, "God has provided for your husband's complete sanctification and deliverance from temptation through you, his wife." She goes on to tell her that "Yes, he is wrong [the husband], but your response, though justified, will certainly lead to the destruction of your marriage." - See? It will be the wife's fault if the marriage goes south. She then uses threats of 'when you are alone and the children are in daycare, you're trying to pay the rent on a dumpy duplex, etc, you can always know that you stood on principle.' So her suggestion is to now play the game. You need to beat the competitor - make yourself more attractive, adore him, give him lots of rolls in the hay, show up at the office and be so thankful and sweet towards your husband that you make the "cheap office hussy" feel beneath your class. "It is in your best interest to learn to use the feminine wiles. A woman holds her man with the fragile threads of adoration, thankfulness, delight and just plain fun." Wow!

"When a woman gets old and realizes that there is no man to love an dcherish her, it is sad indeed, for she has failed in the very purpose for which she was created - to be a suitable helper to a man" (pg. 58)

On page 124, there's a paragraph that made me nauseous. It says "Jesus wants us for a friend. He wants a companion, someone with whom to discuss ideas. He wants a playmate, someone with whom to laugh and enjoy life. He wants a buddy with whom to spend time. He wants a lover, someone to care about and someone to care about him. He wants a help meet, someone to share his work of creation and management. He wants to be a groom, and he wants the Church to be his bride." That just sounds so....creepy to me. I understand the church being the bride and that God desires a relationship with us but He needs a buddy? A playmate?

On page 139, she talks about how things aren't fair. "It doesn't seem fair that the wife is expected to honor and obey her husband even though he has not earned the fight; yet she must also earn the right to be loved." She then says "God made it so that we can actually manipulate him into fulfilling his God ordained duty. His very nature is made to respond to us if we will only treat him with reverence."

There's a ton more but these were some of the things that stood out for me. There are way better books out there on being a Godly wife. I understand some say "Well, chew the meat and spit out the bones." but this is like eating a chicken wing tip. Wouldn't you rather have a meatier piece of meat? There's really so little in this book to make it worthwhile that it's best used for firestarter than a book to teach the younger woman to be wives.

 

LOL Tim! According to Debi, a roll in the hay is all you guys need to keep you on the straight and narrow!

So true about how she regards men. I see them in the book as being the head because God said so but they're really dumb, easily manipulated and absolutely blameless in their marriage and relationship with God.

I have to say that my hubby would not allow me to buy either book but I noticed that there were women at church who had been given the books as gifts and another pastor's wife who I really respect loved the Helpmeet book. I told hubby that I wanted to get my own copies so that I could write notes in the books and such - so I had them for reference (like for this thread) but he still said that I couldn't buy the book because that would be supporting that ministry. So I started asking around online and a very kind woman had been given the books and she was willing to send them to me. So now I have both books - and DH wrote on the covers in red marker "Garbage - Do not read this book" LOL