Recently, a KJVO book was published called "Thou Shalt Keep Them" which outlines the basic arguments of those determined to believe that God's Word has been perfectly preserved down through the ages. If you are familiar with the line of reasoning used, and discussions similar to this book, then you may find the spoof below quite humorous. It is not original to me, the author is anonomyous... Chick Thou Shalt Keep Him The Biblical Doctrine of the Perfect Man Deut 8:6 ¯ “Thou shalt keep . . . him.” Please forgive how short this is. I am just a layman, my church will not publish my book on this topic because they think I am a heretic, but here is the basic information anyway. A true fundamentalist is a Biblicist. Today, too many people depend on psychology to determine their doctrine of Man. What does the Bible say??? Perfect Creation implies Perfect Preservation. Perfect-Man Preservation is clearly implied by God’s creative act in Genesis 1 and 2. The use of the verb “keep” demonstrates that God preserves humans from sin Psalm 41:2 ¯ “The Lord will preserve him, and keep him” Isaiah 26:3 ¯ “Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace” Jude 1:24 ¯ He is “able to keep you from falling” Perfect Preservation of Man requires the availability in every generation of at least one perfect Man. The Bible shows this to be true. Enoch “walked with God,” Noah was a “perfect” man, Abram was commanded to “be perfect”, Hezekiah had a “perfect heart”, Job was “perfect” and “upright”, and on and on you could go. While history does not record every perfect Man, we conclude theologically that there has always been a Perfect Man, even in times of spiritual poverty. Scripture demands the Perfect Man. One verse is enough, but there are many more. 2 Cor 11:3 ¯ “Be perfect.” The use of “made” in the perfect tense indicates that God created man perfect and he remains perfect Genesis 5:1 ¯ “in the likeness of God made (perfect tense) he him” Isaiah 43:7 ¯ “I have formed him; yea, I have made him” The Keepers of the Perfect Man Preservation are the Jews in the Old Testament. Deut 18:13 ¯ “Thou shalt be perfect” The Keepers of the Perfect Man Preservation are church members in the New Testament Ephesians 4:13 ¯ “Till we all come [and meet the 21st century] Perfect Man” (we learned we could change Scripture as long as we use brackets) Scripture makes it clear that Satan and those who are on his side seek to corrupt Man. Too many verses to even begin. The basis of the Perfect Man is faith. Since I believe this to be true, it must be true. Anyone who rejects this doctrine is a Non-Faith Person. We must separate from anyone who rejects this doctrine of Perfect Man Preservation. Volume II will reveal who today is the Perfect Man. The purpose of this Volume is simply to demonstrate the True Doctrine of Perfect Man Preservation.