Remarried to the same spouse

Discussion in 'Baptist Theology & Bible Study' started by ktn4eg, Jun 17, 2006.

  1. ktn4eg

    ktn4eg
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    A couple divorces, neither marry someone different, and then they get remarried to each other.

    Is that man "the husband of one wife"?

    Is he disqualified from being a pastor?
     
  2. Gershom

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    1Timothy 3:2 is not dealing with divorce and remarriage, but enlists a man who is not a "womanizer." A "one woman man" is one who meets that requirement. Has nothing to do with divorce.
     
    #2 Gershom, Jun 17, 2006
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 17, 2006
  3. canadyjd

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    You have not given enough information to determine if he is qualified or not. If he remained faithful to his wife while divorced, he may still be considered a "one-woman kind of man" (which is what the passage says, divorce is not mentioned).

    Even at that, the fact they divorced demonstrates he is not managing his household well, which would disqualify him, at least in the short term.

    peace to you:praise:
     
  4. Trotter

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    Gotta agree with that.

    Given time, the man will be able to demonstrate that he is worthy. How much time? Depends on how long they were married before, why they divorced, what happened between times they were together, and how long they have been amrried now. No, I don't have a formula. I'd say a year or two at the shortest, five or so for the longer.
     
  5. Brother Bob

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    We had one case like that which happened before they joined Church. It was not always smooth sailing from everyone over the issue. Later, they left and went to another denomination which let him keep his credentials and he lived there until he died.
     
  6. Terry_Herrington

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    I don't know the specifics, and don't want to, but he probably made a wise decision. Better to leave that to continually gender strife.
     
  7. ktn4eg

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    Re canadyjd's questions:

    As best I know, neither one of them had sexual relations with any one during the time of their divorce.

    Another question:

    Would any of this make any difference if all this happened prior to both of them becoming saved people?
     
  8. canadyjd

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    ktn4eg

    A church I attended several years ago dealt with this very issue. The man was divorced prior to salvation. His second wife had never been married. He felt called to the pastorate, and was in seminary. He had asked our church to ordain him. We spent a considerable time studying the issue, and finally came to two positions.

    1. If a man divorced prior to salvation, then after salvation married a woman who had not been divorced , he would not be disqualified according to the I Tim. text. (Given the other qualifications were met) The new man lives and the old man has died. His sins have been removed as far as the east from the west. If the qualification of "one woman man" is applied to the man prior to salvation, then all the other qualifications must be applied to the man prior to salvation. In that case, no one is qualified.

    or

    2. The marriage relationship is a unique relationship that in some way reflects the relationship between Christ and the Church. God has, therefore, given this qualification to reflect His own devotion to His people, that He will in no way be unfaithful to the promises He has made. For a pastor to have the sin of divorce in his background makes him unsuitable because it reflects upon the bond between Christ and the Church and undermines his authority to speak on the subject.

    I hope this helps
    peace to you:praise:
     
  9. Paul of Eugene

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    And many of us continue to believe that the passage simply means the man isn't to be married to two women at once.

    As evidence this is the proper way to consider the passage I cite the example of Jesus as the woman at the well told Him "I have no husband".

    Did Jesus say "You have miscounted?" Or did Jesus say "You have spoken correctly?" For she had been with five husbands, and he whom she now had was not her husband.

    Jesus said she counted correctly. And that is the scriptural way to count the wives of any candidate for ministry or deacon . . . simply, how many women is he married to right now? Of course, there are the other matters as well. Any man who has divorced five times like the woman at the well, perhaps one would be very suspicious about his credentials in the managing his family department . . . .
     
  10. Brother Bob

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    When a couple marry and are twain but become as one flesh are they joined together as one in Heaven?
    Also, Scripture say tho ye be joined to a harlot you become as one. Are they joined together as one in Heaven?
     
  11. LeBuick

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    Yes BroBOB, let's hear your point.

    When did the Jews stop allowing more than one wife?

    Now let's exmine the words of Jesus closely, "But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery."

    Looks to me like the sin is adultry which happens when she marries the second time. How did we get divorce to be the crime?
     
  12. canadyjd

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    Jesus said there would be no marriage in heaven (Mark 12:25)

    peace to you:praise:
     
  13. Brother Bob

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    He also said whatsoever you bind on earth shall be bound in Heaven.
    Matthew, chapter 18

    "18": Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.


    LeBuick;
    My point is if a marriage is bound in Heaven and Jesus said the only way allowed to put your companion away is fornication then even though man gives a divorce does that mean Heaven will honor that divorce or are they still bound in Heaven?

    This couple after marriage is "one" in Heaven. Does it take Heaven to make them twain again?
     
    #13 Brother Bob, Jun 19, 2006
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 19, 2006
  14. Deacon

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    I agree, ...and sure, they were disqualified in the short-term but the fact that they remarried demonstrates that this gentleman and his wife were able to work through things and reconcile themselves.

    The trials in a pastorate are long and many.
    I would hope that they have worked through the problems and resolved the issues that caused the initial breakup before considering them for another pastoral position.

    Rob
     
  15. npetreley

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    I agree that this is what it means. Your mileage may vary, but in my experience, I've never seen a pastor who was a bad pastor because he was divorced at any time. I haven't seen Charles Stanley become a bad pastor because he's now divorced (I think he is, anyway, though I don't know the details of why or when if I'm right).

    But I have seen more than one pastor who caused loads of trouble because he got involved in illicit affairs with women in the congregation. IMO, that should tell you why the warning is in the Bible.
     
  16. canadyjd

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    The context of the passage is church discipline, not marriage or divorce. The "binding" and "loosing" where rabbinic phrases dealing with how a rabbi viewed a certain matter.

    For example "May I search for a lost sheep on the Sabbath?"

    Rabbi so-n-so binds you (you may not):

    Rabbi so-and-so looses you (you may).

    Jesus is telling the disciples (and the church later) that their decisions on church discipline (18:v.15-20) will be "binding" on the church members and honored in heaven. If I remember a Prof I had once, the grammar is such that the verse could be translated "Whatsoever you bind on earth shall have already been bound in heaven; and whatsoever you loose on earth shall have already been loosed in heaven".

    Essentially, if you follow Jesus' guidelines for church discipline, God will honor your church's discision.

    There is still no marriage in heaven except that of the Son to His Bride.

    peace to you:praise:
     
  17. LeBuick

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    When you say in heaven, you mean now or in the kingdom to come?

    By now I mean the marriage described in Gen 2:22 - 24 and blessed in Mt 19:6.

    As for the kingdom to come, this question was asked to Jesus in Mt 22:24 -28. Jesus answered in verse 30, "For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven."

    That's why I'm trying to figure out which angle you coming from?
     
  18. Brother Bob

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    Would have to be now.

    Canady;
    So, if that Scripture is to the dicipline of the Church it still does not change the fact that a union between a man and a woman called marriage is bound in Heaven for He said tho ye be joined to a Harlot ye shall become as one flesh.

    He also said, for this cause shall a man leave father and mother and they twain shall become as one flesh. So it is bound in Heaven.

    So if it is bound in Heaven, does man have the authority to desolve it for
    "any cause"?
     
  19. Salamander

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    Jesus straightened out the misconception of what Moses allowed due to the hardness of a man's heart to put away the wife that had some uncleaness in her: that is, she wasn't the virgin he understood her to be.

    Jesus did this by the following statement,"...but from the beginning, it was not so.":praying:

    Now if you want to argue that the hardness of a man's heart has precedence over the Holy Covenant of matrimony, be my guest, but you would be fighting against the very God you serve.:praise: :Fish: :praise:
     
  20. canadyjd

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    I am not sure I follow you exactly. Are you saying that whenever a man and a woman engage in sexual intercourse, they are considered to be married in heaven? Even if it is with a prostitute, out of wedlock but consensual (I will assume you wouldn't include non-consensual) etc...?

    peace to you:praise:
     

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