rites of passage

Discussion in 'Hobby/Travel Forum' started by JoeKan, Jan 1, 2009.

  1. JoeKan

    JoeKan
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    Hello,
    My son is going to be 13 in a few weeks and I am wanting to conduct a rites of passage for him. Not in my church, but at home. I'm not sure exactly what to do, but I feel that I need to acknowledge before him that he is becoming a man.
    Does anyone have any ideas as to what to do? I know that other men have done this with their son(s) and daughter(s) and am just looking for some ideas.
    Thanks,
    Preach The WORD,
    Joe
     
  2. Jim1999

    Jim1999
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    Joe, I have never heard of this in the Baptist Church. You might want to try looking it up on google.

    Cheers,

    Jim
     
  3. blackbird

    blackbird
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    If he were me---------if I were him------lets seeeeeeeee

    A brand spankin' new shotgun or rifle (or maybe even both)

    A set of golf clubs-------I mean, I asked my boy(age 14)--"What 'cha want for Christmas, Boy???!!" ---------- A golf glove for my left hand!!!! ----------- A what???? --------- A golf glove, they sell 'um in singles over at Academy!!!

    Does anyone KNOW how much a SINGLE handed golf glove costs????!!!

    Have mercy!!!

    A brand spankin' new fishing Rod & Reel------the good kind----not the cheap kind

    etc
    etc
    etc

    Stay away from the latest "cell phone" jazz------most parents will buy their kids a cell phone-----and go on and on and on about how their kid "haz somethin'"---------the boy ain't got diddle--ee

    No ipod
    no phone
    no video game
    no blackberry---------you buy me a blackberry-------and I'll take it back to the store you bought it from and exchange it for a tacklebox full of fishing lures and an new rod and reel

    blackbird
     
  4. padredurand

    padredurand
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    An old car, a Chiltons manual and a box full of Craftsman tools. :thumbs: :thumbs:

    ...and what Blackbird said....
     
  5. Thinkingstuff

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    you could always christianize a bar mitzvah.
     
  6. ktn4eg

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    It's too late to visit in real time the goings-on at the place that would have introduced sonny boy to the finer things in a gentleman's life and to see firsthand how one must go about preparing himself to get on the fast track to acquiring the status necessary to be admitted into this rather select group......


    .....but---thanks to the powers of the internet---at least you'll get somewhat of an idea of how you can be the real source of inspiration and guidance that a true father ought to be by visiting www.claycountyprogress.com and follow the links on said website of the paper that proclaims that it only publishes "News You Can Trust" for its coverage of Brasstown, NC's world-famous New Year's Eve celebration known as (at least by those folks that know about this inner circle of men who've attained to this status of manhood) none other but the ANNUAL POSSUM DROP !!!!

    Words greatly fail to capture the true essence of the entire event ("You'd had to had been there!"), but if you'll then jump over to the website www.clayscorner.com you'll find out that there are DVD's available for your education and edification (Price ranges in the $20 area)....

    ...Oh, yes, that same website's store also offers a vast selection of possum a-cooter-ments such as the "MUST-HAVE" half liter bottles of Possum Water, .

    ...and for those health-conscious folks [and aren't we ALL in that category? :smilewinkgrin: ] in our midst there's 3-oz. tins of the new "Diet Lite Brasstown O'Possum [Those critters trace their lineage back to the Emerald Isle.]" selling for just a couple bucks. This here garrunteed product ain't shipped in from no furrin' place either!! They'll have you to know this product was taken from the offal of that giant possum run over by Mercer Scroggs right-smack-dab in front of Clay's Corner Store. And to garruntee this here product's freshness, they take great pains to process it through the high-mountain-fresh waters of nearby Greasy Creek!!

    As folks in those parts will plainly testify, that thar stuff is "MIGHTY HEAP GOOD EATIN', DON'TCHA KNOW!!!"

    Now, I don't know if that's the kind of 'Rite of Passage' y'all had in mind, but if you take heed and follow closely the actions and aspirations of those brave men that have gone before, Sonny Boy will be a different man than what he was coming into this!! :thumbs:
     
  7. Bible-boy

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    I have heard some pastors and Mens Ministry guys speak of this. I recall they suggested taking a day that you spend with your son and other godly men who have influenced your life and his. The men should be prepared to engage your son on the topic of what it means to be a Christian man (husband and father as well). You should also give him the "purity talk" about saving himself $exually for his future wife. You could even present him with a plain wedding band to wear in his right hand to remind him of his commitment to God, his future wife, and your family to remain pure. He could give this ring to his future wife on their wedding night. You can also get ideas about purity from True Love Waits.

    As father of daughters I would encourage you to teach your son what it means to respect and honor women. Teach him to pray daily for the woman who will one day become his wife. Pray for her purity and her family's preparation of her as a young Christian woman. These should be prayers of yours and your wife's as well.

    In addition to the huntin and fishin ideas (which I would do as well) you could have several times where you and the other godly men in your son's life gather around him, lay hands on him, and pray over him. Along with all of this you will need to impress upon your son that from now on you will begin to consider him a man. He is young and inexperienced but nonetheless and young man. You will begin to hold him to a higher degree of accountability for his actions (and inactions). You will give him more freedom to make his own descisions and he will have to live with the consequences for making bad ones. Here you will need to remind him that he is still your son and you will be there to lend a hand or guidance at his request and you'll be there to help him up when/if he makes mistakes. Remind him that with this new found freedom also comes responsibility. It is his responsibility to never bring shame upon the name of the Lord, upon himself, upon you and your wife, or upon the honor of your family name etc.

    Finally, I would begin giving him biographies of great Missionarys and talking to him about the honor of serving the Lord in ministry. It is amazing to me to see the number of godly young women who come to SEBTS in order to prepare to go on the mission field and by comparison how few young Baptist men are likewise even considering missionary service as a possibility. It seems as if they (the young men) have no clue about the excitement and adventure of serving the Lord in missions. You and your wife should also begin praying that if the Lord directs your son to the mission feild that you would not stand in the way and would be openly supportive (or better yet ask the Lord to use your son as a missionary).

    I hope this helps,

    Bible-boy
     
  8. Jim1999

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  9. Salty

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    He is now able to join Baptist Board!
     
  10. JoeKan

    JoeKan
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    Thank you.
     
  11. North Carolina Tentmaker

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    JoeKan:

    The biggest thing to me is spending time with him. You need to set a day aside and focus on him. If you enjoy fishing or hunting or camping those would be great. If your more urban then a trip to a ball game or something like that might be better.

    Father/Son retreats are a great idea. I have taken my sons to father/son weekends at The Wilds camp here in NC. You can read about them here

    http://www.wilds.org/twca/brochures/Spring 2K9 Brochure.pdf

    I know you are not near us but there are bound to be some Christian camps closer to you that offer the same kind of things.

    I like bible-boys suggestion of talking with or about men who have influenced your life. If your father is still alive an a Godly man then I would include him.

    At some point you want to have the sex/purity talk with him.

    The point of the bar mitzvah is that the boy is now a man and legally subject to the law. So I would make a big point of how you expect more from him now.

    I would not do it like a party with lots of other people but more private with you and him. At least that is what I have done with my sons.

    Rites of passage are IMHO overrated as ceremonies. It is the personal achievements that he will reach over the next 5-10 years that are the real rites of passage. First job, first car, first date, first gun, first kill, graduations, first loss of a friend, first broken heart. I think those are the real rites of passage because they represent real accomplishments and trials. I think too often we try to make something out of nothing. Reaching a given date on a calender is not a real achievement. I think our children understand that. Oh we are having a party because I have managed to stay alive for 13 years. Or, like I did with my 12 year old this last year, I did a 10 miler to the summit of Standing Indian Mountain with my dad.
     
    #11 North Carolina Tentmaker, Jan 5, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 5, 2009

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