some help please

Discussion in 'Other Christian Denominations' started by gekko, Jun 29, 2006.

  1. gekko

    gekko
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    hey all. no debate or anything here. (sorry to those debate-hounds! :D)

    i wanted to post this - see what you think - see if there could be any word changes or structure change - anything to do with constructive criticism please.
    ---

    thank you,
    God Bless.
    gek
     
  2. Jim1999

    Jim1999
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    One thought:

    The problem is not which we have become,
    But rather what we have not become,
    It is not for us to fashion ourselves. No, it is Him.
    If we have become that which we were previously not,
    The problem then becomes that which we face. For we face war-an age old war, fought for centuries with swords and shields.
    Two sides; corrupt or pure.
    One will conquer the other.
    Choose wisely the side to best ally with.

    Note: I used the best grammatical construction without changing your basic wording. Example, good grammar never repeats the same word in a single sentence..."that".

    Cheers,

    Jim
     
  3. gekko

    gekko
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    thanks Jim for the suggestion!

    God bless
     

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