SPIRITUAL ABUSE....

I don't believe you can lose your salvation. And no, wives and sons are not the same. I was giving you a simple illustration of submission. There may be times when a husband does not need nor desire the input of his wife, and this may come as a surprise to you, but we may have already made a decision even if we do ask your input. God has placed the ultimate final responsibility for the household on the man, and whether we would or not, we don't have the option of sharing that responsibility with you ladies.

Women who browbeat, henpeck, castrate etc. their husbands when they try to assert any authority in their house are the true spiritual abusers.

 

Hmmmm. That's exactly what I was thinking about several posters here.

Some of us may not be 'professionals', but we have had a lot of experience counseling. We have raised children and grandchildren and we have been through much.

The term 'spiritual abuse' is an overrated term. Some people use this term because they think it sounds more righteous than emotional or mental abuse.

Spiritual abuse doesn't wound our emotional selves, it wounds our spirits (as implied by the name)...

People don't need to have 'letters' after their names to give wise counsel. They just need to be Godly people. And they become this way by listening to the wisdom of the Lord and trying to walk in His way, daily.

We are exhorted, in God's Word, to seek out a host of "Godly people", not necessarily "professionals".

JMHO,
§ue

 

Spiritual Abuse? Sounds like a whole lot of nothing! I'll tell you what I think "Spiritual Abuse" is if there is such a thing. It's watching a TV show called "swapping wives" with your children! Some people on here think they can run faster, jump higher, swim deeper and come up drier then anybody else just because they have letters behind their name.

 

One can have the whole alphabet behind one's name, but without Godly wisdom, he/she is nothing more than an educated fool.

No, this is not directed towards anyone and I am NOT making a personal attack. I am just stating my opinion because that's what people do on a 'board'...

 

One good book is "Churches that Abuse" by Enroth.

 

Ok, but you're not supposed to say that out loud around the women! Like we don't say how we manage to have you guys at the store buying ice cream at 2am, and thinking you WANTED to go.

 

Ive read one of these books on spiritual abuse, and it covered such instances as when a pastor lies and steals in order to get the congregation's money and then runs away with it.....or when the pastor takes over the people's personal lives to such an extent that he is taking over men's wives for (you know what) and brainwashing them all to the point that they actually think they are doing the will of God by submitting to such things.
One big warning sign given in this book is when the leader starts convincing the followers that they ought not speak or interact with anyone from their "former" life.....family and friends not in the "church" are considered heretics or some such thing, and should not be a part of their life anymore. I've seen the beginnings of this once in a group that claimed to be a "Boy's School". My friends who were workers there got out of that fast!

I do think we ought to be careful not to accuse a man of "spiritual abuse" simply because he preaches adamantly on standards. To me this is degrading the real instances of truly spiritually abusive behaviour.

I haven't listened to the sermons that apparently started this whole OP, so I am stating a general opinion not directed towards any one person.

 

A few years ago, I read a very good book on spiritual abuse. Its title is "The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse" by David Johnson and Jeff VanVonderen.

It was published by Bethany House Publishers, 6820 Auto Club Road, Minneapolis, Minnesota, 55438.
Copyright 1991. ISBN 1-55661-160-9. 232 Pages.

A pastor and christian counselor wrote the book.

I highly recommend this book.

drfuss

 

Frenchy,

Good thread. Good ideas.
et al,

Anybody who denies the reality of spiritual abuse either has their eyes closed or they "are the man"! Jesus called it the "blind leading the blind" and referred to the spiritual abusers of his day as a “generation of vipers” and asked “how can ye escape the damnation of hell”?!?!

Someone does not need to necessarily try to change behavior to be an abuser, they may only seek to change an attitude or a belief, which will then lead to changed behavior. Or they may only seek to dominate in an emotional or intellectual way.
I am going to do a thread on “speaking the truth in love” – something we could all do with a little more of...
I wonder what some of our grade school report cards looked like???

 

"Notice the first command is to the husband, to LOVE his wife if he does that the wife will obey out of respect for you."

Sorry Frenchy but that is not truth. A husband that loves his wife is no guarantee that a wife will obey any more then a wife who obeys will make a husband love her.

HOwever each is to follow their commands from God regardless, as unto Him(God).

 

Frenchy: You have just described my Pastor!