Featured Stages of grief

5. No trolling. Trolling consists of provoking large volumes of responses by posting absurdities, deliberately offensive insults, etc.


This rule has repeatedly been broken by FAL and yet he remains here. I can remember when people got banned for far less. I don't enjoy the BB anymore.

 

May you never have a wife who experiences depression and attempts suicide. I thank God for the drugs that my wife took temporarily that helped her return to normalcy.

 

Are you sure about that?

Judges 11:40 That the daughters of Israel went yearly to lament the daughter of Jephthah the Gileadite four days in a year.

 

Do you just play a jerk here or are you one in real life also? No one says we should not trust in God but sometimes trust in God involves trusting the people He sends to us to help us or trusting in the medicines (drugs as you call them) that He has allowed us to have.

 

:thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup: :applause:

 

For what it is worth, if it were in my authority, this "person" would have been a faded memory many weeks ago.

 

Like I said thank you for the word game :laugh:

 

Yes I am sure. You seem to have the propensity to leave out certain parts of scripture so as to make it seem like it is not. Just before that in the prior verse it says " And it was a custom in Israel," This was not about keeping staying attached, but a custom to show respect for the dead. One proof is it was only women. This is just a custom with no particular emotional attachment. It was cultural and had no particular personal feeling. There is no suggestion this is how we are to be in fact this is much like the paid mourners during the time of Christ who would be bought and paid by the family for to weep at the funeral of someone and catch their tears in a jar to keep face that the person was loved. These woman in that passage you gave would not even have to know the dead woman intimately, it was a custom, not personal affection or attraction.
Lastly it does not suggest that it went on for more then a year and in fact we know it ended at some point. It was just a custom.

 

I don't enjoy it as much, either. The meanness that's been given a pass makes me wonder why I'm here.

I know I've been a bit negative toward FAL as of late. I have a low tolerance for bullying. The picking on and goading of weaker (for lack of a better term) brethren that has been allowed, especially in the threads about mental disorders, is unchristian, childish, petty, and just plain wrong. Why it's allowed is beyond me, unless he has a financial stake in the site.

I'm thinking about cancelling my account here, but there's many other folks here whose postings I find educational and enjoyable. I don't know.

 

Judges 11:39-40 And it came to pass at the end of two months, that she returned unto her father, who did with her according to his vow which he had vowed: and she knew no man. And it was a custom in Israel, That the daughters of Israel went yearly to lament the daughter of Jephthah the Gileadite four days in a year.

Yes it was a custom; I never denied it wasn't. How does that change any thing? As to the time frame it doesn't give one. Perhaps one year, but unlikely. Customs usually last much longer than one year. The verse specifically says "went yearly" so we know that it was much longer than a year.

Regarding death. In mid-east and eastern nations, the people celebrated or remembered the death more than the birth of their loved ones. We even have this example in Christ himself. Early Christians never celebrated the birth of Christ and no such example is given in the Bible, but we are commanded to remember his death in the Lord's Supper. And we do, not only then, but also on Good Friday, and also in our baptism. Death to self is also emphasized throughout the Christian life.

We are commanded to be "Crucified with Christ." Paul said "I die daily". "Put the old man to death" "You are dead to sin."
Jesus said, "If any man will come after me let him deny himself, take up his cross daily, and follow me" (Luke 9:23).
The cross is the instrument of death, of execution in the time of Christ. Christ died as a criminal on a cross. We are to die daily.
Death is referred to and emphasized in the Bible.

Those visiting the Holy Land seek out the site of where our Lord was buried.
Muslims seek out the site where Mohammed was buried.
--Neither seek the place of their births.

There are shrines dotting this world of "saints", prophets, wise men, leaders of various religions--of their burial places, but not of their birth places. People remember them in their death, not in their birth.
The next time the Hajj or Muslim Pilgrimage to Mecca takes place watch a channel that records what happens. See the mourning, wailing, the remembrance for their prophet.

 

The passage has nothing to with emotion or attrachment, but with custom. They did this out or memory not attachment.

 

Custom has nothing to do with it. The people of the town were very familiar with her, and even more so after Jephtae's heroic actions. It would be like mourning for a queen.

More importantly, Good Friday is a "custom" isn't it. For most people there is much emotional attachment present on that day. There ought to be.
Even more so in celebrating the Lord's Supper which is both a command and a custom. If one is void of emotion there, then something is wrong. Here is the most worshipful service of the church, or it ought to be. Please don't tell me that customs are void of emotion.

 

And you accused me of word games? Pot meet kettle. :flower:

You mean to tell us that there is no emotion or attachment connected with visiting the grave of a loved one? If that's the case let wrap our dead in saran Wrap and toss them in a landfill. I have trouble believing that you have no emotional attachment to the saints that went on before you. Jesus taught about grief in His first public sermon. Paul taught about grief to the church at Thessalonica.....

But we do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve, as do the rest who have no hope.
1 Thessalonians 4:13 NAS77

Paul makes a distinction between two types of grief: one with hope and one without. We know our hope is in Jesus Christ and we proclaim it at every opportunity. That does not preclude sorrow, hurt, and all the emotions that come with loss it tempers them. How does Isaiah describe Jesus but as "a man of sorrows acquainted with grief".

I visit my mother's grave on my birthday. I get older that day and I commemorate the day of her homegoing. You would have us believe the tears I shed there demonstrate my lack of faith. I pity you if that is the case.

Everyone who accepts the gift of love equally accepts the risk of grief. I know one day I will see her in the fullness of God. Until that day I will miss her wisdom, tenderness and Dutch apple pie.

 

Yes it is about custom. The passage has nothing to with emotion or attachment, but with custom. They did this out or memory not attachment. If this is what the Lord wanted he would have told us instead of telling us to let the dead bury the dead. In other words don’t live our lives looking back or with anticipation of what might happen.

 

Attachment give the idea that there is an ongoing relationship or a clinging to some past that cannot be resurrected when it needs to be buried with the dead. Memory suggest that the past is past but not forgotten altogether lost.
Continued attachment to a dead loved one does not being healing or allow moving on while memory preserves what once was and allows the person to move on. To not be able to detach ones self from past things that can never be again is nothing but an anchor for that persons life and shows they have not allowed the Lord to work in their life for what lies ahead.

 

I have a relative who visits the graveside of her grandfather every year for the past three years. Every year she comes back in tears. No emotion?? No attachment??
You don't know what you are talking about.

 

This type of oversimplification reminds me of Bob Newhart

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BYLMTvxOaeE

 

Attachment? Why not. Attachment as you call it demonstrates the depth of affection. Relationship are meaningful to most of us. Obviously, mine with my mother has changed greatly. I love her nonetheless but that doesn't mean I'm anchored at the same place I was the morning she died. Maybe some of these words are foreign to you but I'm thinking: love, affection, gratitude, honor.

You might want to spend some time studying Matthew 8 before you flippantly toss out the let the dead bury their dead passage. Context matters. The Word isn't the place to grab short phrases to prove a weak position.

 

Folks,
The longer we engage this type of behavior, the more it grows. It is kind of like Rush Limbaugh, if everyone turned the off switch, he would shut up. Everyone has the right to an opinion, but there are boundaries of human decency. This type of thinking goes way beyond being a Christian.

 

Was Jesus too emotionally attached?

John 11:35 "Jesus wept."