Suspension Looms for attending the High School Prom

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by go2church, May 8, 2009.

  1. go2church

    go2church
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2002
    Messages:
    4,304
    Likes Received:
    6
  2. Salty

    Salty
    Expand Collapse
    20,000 Posts Club
    Moderator

    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2003
    Messages:
    22,131
    Likes Received:
    221
    The student made a covenant with the school. I think he should stick by it.
     
  3. matt wade

    matt wade
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2009
    Messages:
    6,156
    Likes Received:
    76
    I may not agree with all their rules, but they are their rules and were made known at the beginning of the school year.

    The student may very well have just signed the statement because he felt he was forced to. The student signing doesn't mean much to me. The problem as I see it is in this statement:

    The stepfather should never have sent the child to the school if he wasn't willing to deal with the rules at that school. This mess is the stepfather's fault for not putting his foot down and telling the student that the rules would be obeyed.
     
  4. SeekingTruth

    SeekingTruth
    Expand Collapse
    Member

    Joined:
    May 25, 2005
    Messages:
    514
    Likes Received:
    1
    I agree with Salt. Too often people enter into a covenant (contract if you wish), gain the benefits of that covenant but when it becomes an impediment to something they want to do, then the covenant is discarded. I hope the Christian school sticks to its guns.
     
  5. John Toppass

    John Toppass
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2008
    Messages:
    1,062
    Likes Received:
    7
    If they really want to get technical, when the principal signed the permission slip then he should have put the consequences in writing or not signed the slip according to the covenant rules. This is a two way street, the student was trying to do what was right. Who knows maybe he will be a witness to others by his behavior.
     
    #5 John Toppass, May 8, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: May 8, 2009
  6. Zenas

    Zenas
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    May 7, 2007
    Messages:
    2,640
    Likes Received:
    6
    I read the article twice and there just isn't enough there to tell what students were and were not allowed to do. I agree that if this student had advance notice of the consequences of going to a public high school's prom, then he has no right to complain. But I get the feeling that the school may have been making up the rules as they went along, and that just isn't right.
     
  7. Scarlett O.

    Scarlett O.
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 22, 2002
    Messages:
    9,836
    Likes Received:
    115
    Here's the whole problem in a nutshell.

    If the consequence of suspension were outlined and made clear in the rules that were signed at the beginning of the year, then why was there a warning and why was there a school committee meeting and why did the committee have to vote and decide to "threaten" him with suspension.

    If consequences are spelled out in advance, the only thing to do is to enforce them.

    It sounds as if the consequences were not in place. One cannot make up consequences after the fact and be able to legally keep one from graduating.
     
  8. Aaron

    Aaron
    Expand Collapse
    Member

    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2000
    Messages:
    15,685
    Likes Received:
    241
    Y'all are assuming that you're being told the whole story in the article, and that what you are being told is accurate and truthful.

    Why was this even considered newsworthy in the first place?
     
  9. StefanM

    StefanM
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2004
    Messages:
    6,430
    Likes Received:
    72
    Do they think we live in Colonial New England?
     
  10. Pastor Larry

    Pastor Larry
    Expand Collapse
    <b>Moderator</b>
    Moderator

    Joined:
    May 4, 2001
    Messages:
    21,763
    Likes Received:
    0
    Why don't we face the facts that while the prom dinner might be good, the dress is mostly immodest, drawing attention to girls' figures, and the dancing is something that no unmarried people should be involved in.

    Why is that even questioned? Two high school teenagers rubbing their bodies against each other while the girl is dressed in a form fitting gown designed to accentuate the things that teen boys (and men who aren't dead) find attractive.

    Sounds like an excellent plan for Christian growth and godly purity.

    Even if his date was dressed appropriately, the others at the party would not be.
     
  11. John Toppass

    John Toppass
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2008
    Messages:
    1,062
    Likes Received:
    7
    Then maybe we should not even allow our young men to walk down public streets without a blindfold and seeing eye dog.
     
  12. Pastor Larry

    Pastor Larry
    Expand Collapse
    <b>Moderator</b>
    Moderator

    Joined:
    May 4, 2001
    Messages:
    21,763
    Likes Received:
    0
    I think there is certainly danger there. Today, women are not taught modesty. Most of them have no idea what effect their appearance has on men. I saw a recent survey that 75% of men have an issue with this. (The other 25% may be liars.) Why do we want that for our young men and our young ladies?
     
  13. gb93433

    gb93433
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2003
    Messages:
    15,496
    Likes Received:
    6
    Years ago when I taught high school some of the teachers were responsible for serving as those who helped with the prom. Each year there was a married couple who attended the event and helped with it. They also provided a lot of entertainment for the teenagers. It was rather amusing to watch the teenagers watch the couple dance. It was great to have them there because they set the tone for the dance. The students were dressed well and behaved themselves. Christian couples can help to solve the problem by not avoiding the dance but by actually conducting themselves as an example to teenagers. It does make a difference when people are an example.

    When I was much younger my grandparents danced in their living room and had a lot of fun doing it. They grew up in a community where that was a weekly event among the city people and farmers. When I was in Finland it was much the same way in many restaurants.

    Not everything has to be perverted.
     
  14. Pastor Larry

    Pastor Larry
    Expand Collapse
    <b>Moderator</b>
    Moderator

    Joined:
    May 4, 2001
    Messages:
    21,763
    Likes Received:
    0
    So how does an unmarried couple slow dance in a godly way?

    I can't fathom how that kind of body contact is appropriate. I think Christian couples can help by teaching young people to reserve their bodies (every part of them) for marriage.

    What good comes out of unmarried couples slow dancing?
     
  15. Scarlett O.

    Scarlett O.
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 22, 2002
    Messages:
    9,836
    Likes Received:
    115
    Not all proms have girls in immodest clothing and boys humping (er...dancing) all over the girls.

    Our school just had a junior-senior prom. The chaperones told me that the girls were dressed quite nicely and they danced in small groups and the boys just stood against the walls too scared to ask the girls to dance.

    Not all teenagers are what you see on those filthy teen movies.

    Anyway, the point of this thread is ascertaining whether or not the principal was in error of judgment or out of his jurisdiction.

    Yet this thread seems to have devolved into immodest and irreverent women and impressionable young men being seduced by them. :BangHead:

    Seems to be a common theme here.
     
  16. Alive in Christ

    Alive in Christ
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2008
    Messages:
    3,822
    Likes Received:
    0
    GB...

    Wonderful way of handling it!

    I give that 5 stars! *****

    No, wait. Its better than that. I give it 10 stars! **********


    :godisgood:
     
  17. Alive in Christ

    Alive in Christ
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2008
    Messages:
    3,822
    Likes Received:
    0
    Scarlett...

    :laugh::laugh::laugh:

    Oh, my does that ever bring back memories! I certainly WAS one of those boys too scared to ask any of the girls to dance.

    But finally, I saw this pretty girl, and was CERTAIN she would say no, but she said "sure!" and off we went. I couldnt dance worth a lick but I guess I did good enough cause she said she had a good time.

    It was all so innocent, and so awkward!
     
  18. gb93433

    gb93433
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2003
    Messages:
    15,496
    Likes Received:
    6
    I would think that the majority of people today would agree that immorality is at an all time high. We live in a day of a lot of privacy which lends itself to trouble. Perhaps you are unaware of the days when families lived in a small one room house of say about 12' X 12' or less. What do you think all of those folks in the NT lived in. Not all of them had homes or tents which had separate rooms. We must be careful not to press our American way and lifestyle onto scripture. There was a day in America when women wore what we today call modest and it was seen as immodest then.

    Too many young girls have never been hugged by their dad and then when some young guy touches them they are excited beyond what they should be and mistake that for love when in reality it is nothing or something it shouldn't be.

    Many times in fun I would show my daughter how I kiss my wife. I kiss my wife many times a day in front of her. She knows that my wife is special to me and she see how I treat other women and young ladies. I tell her that women wait for men to open the door. I open the doors for both my wife and daughter. By treating my daughter well like a man should she knows what good treatment is like both by the way she is treated and the way she sees how I treat her mom--my wife.
     
    #18 gb93433, May 9, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: May 9, 2009
  19. blackbird

    blackbird
    Expand Collapse
    Administrator
    Administrator

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2002
    Messages:
    11,898
    Likes Received:
    2
    The issue is NOT whether attending a prom is right or wrong----------thats not the issue

    The issue is NOT "Well----we had our prom the other day and everybody was dressed nice and everybody behaved themselves!!!!"

    Thats not the issue

    The issue is one of personal ethics and liability--------the teenager SIGNED his "John Hancock" to a statement that stated he would not engage in prom promotion/attendance

    He signed his name-------thats the issue

    And now he wants to "renig"------he shows no sign of responsiblilty

    Lets just say------same boy-----signs his name to a car loan-----and down the line-------he can't make his payments for whatever reason

    Whats the bank gonna do??

    They're comin' after their car------regardless of his excuse

    If he signed his name to a paper stateing he would not attend------then don't attend

    If he signed his name for something as simple as that---and renigs or recants-------whats he gonna do when he faces the REAL world???

    "I signed------but I didn't mean it!!!!" is ethical laziness!!!!

    "I signed----but now I've changed my mind!!!" is still ethical laziness!!

    I challenge readers to study the Book of Proverbs concerning this issue-----you won't find anywhere in Proverbs that says--------"You can't attend proms!!!!"----------but you will find truth that teaches responsibility and liability!!!----------to me---if the dude is a Believer and he signed his name to something it ought to be as if Jesus Christ were signing it----he should sign it as if he were Jesus Christ Himself------and he should sign it as if Jesus Christ were that Principal!!!!
     
    #19 blackbird, May 9, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: May 9, 2009
  20. Zenas

    Zenas
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    May 7, 2007
    Messages:
    2,640
    Likes Received:
    6
    Maybe so, maybe not. Whatever he signed should be binding upon the student, but we are speculating on what the "statement of cooperation" said. And don't forget, the statement was drafted by the school. Therefore any ambiguities it contains should be construed in favor of the student and against the school.
     

Share This Page

Loading...