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Discussion in '2004 Archive' started by Eugenia, Jan 13, 2004.

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  1. Eugenia

    Eugenia New Member

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    To begin with, i would like to tell all of you how wonderful this is to have someone to talk to anytime i want to that is of my own faith. I appreciate all of you. As you know i lost my husband of 35 years to lung cancer this past September. It would have been 3 year this February 28 that we went to a local shelter and got 2 dogs, Brittany and Spears. Well, Brittany developed congestive heart failure quite some time ago and the vet had her on two lasix a day. To make a long story short Brittany got a lot worse this past Friday and passed away tonight. I was by myself and this is the most cruel death that i have ever seen in a human or animal. She gasp and gasp for breath, had fluid coming out her mouth, and it seemed like it went on forever. She was a senior dog when we got her and i would guess her to be about 14 or so today. I was beside myslef. I screamed for my husband saying where are you at and told God that this is cruel and to have mercy on Brittany and me and to just let her go. I yelled and sobbed like some mental case. I think part of it was Brittany and part of it was only 3 months since i lost my husband. I guess i just needed to let it out. I have always tried to be the strong one of the whole family. Now i just hope God understands that one person can only take so much. Thanks for listening. Eugenia
     
    #1 Eugenia, Jan 13, 2004
  2. I Am Blessed 24

    I Am Blessed 24 Active Member

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    Eugenia;

    Many of us here have lost mates through death and we can relate to what you are going through.

    There are 5 stages of grief. It sounds like you might be on #2 right now. Everyone must take the time to grieve and we don't do it all on the same time schedule.

    I went back and forth from #2 to #4 for quite awhile before I reached #5.

    #1. DENIAL
    #2. ANGER
    #3. BARGAINING
    #4. DEPRESSION
    #5. ACCEPTANCE

    For a detailed description of each of these steps CLICK HERE

    God Bless You!
    [​IMG]
    §ue
     
    #2 I Am Blessed 24, Jan 13, 2004
  3. Debby in Philly

    Debby in Philly Active Member

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    I agree with Sue, and I would add that to those of us who love animals and relate to them as friends and even children, the process is the same. I lost my father to cancer, and a young cat (5 yrs old) to leukemia, and I grieved heavily for both. What helped me was of course that I knew I could talk to the Lord at any time, and I told Him of my anger. I think focusing my anger at the diseases, and not at God or the person or animal helped me also. I am still very mad at both of these conditions that sin brought into our world. I am so glad that it will all be over when we get to glory, and see our loved ones.
    I hope you attend a church where you have some friends to help you, especially some dog lovers too! Don't be afraid to let them help you.

    Blessings,
    Debby
     
    #3 Debby in Philly, Jan 13, 2004
  4. Artimaeus

    Artimaeus Active Member

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    Eugenia, Sue's post was excellent. Understanding what you are going through doesn't lessen the pain but it does lessen the confusion. Emothions are very eratic. If you understand that they are also fletting and not permanent then enduring them can be seen as not hopeless.. It is a dark tunnel but like ALL tunnels there IS an end.
     
    #4 Artimaeus, Jan 13, 2004
  5. Eugenia

    Eugenia New Member

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    Thanks for the post. Sue, you are not going to believe this. I went into the the site of different stages of grieving and was just fine until i read where it takes between 1 and 2 years to go through the grief. I cried, guess after last night i just cry easy. The thing is, i am still upset over my husband and dog but i feel better today, i think from letting it out. Thanks, Eugenia
     
    #5 Eugenia, Jan 13, 2004
  6. I Am Blessed 24

    I Am Blessed 24 Active Member

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    Eugenia: If you feel like crying...CRY! That is part of the grieving AND healing process. That's why God gave us tear ducts. It releases stress and also feels cleansing.

    Don't forget to cry out to God also. He loves you sooo much! He lost a Son and He knows the pain you are feeling right now and He is there to help you through it.

    Praying for you,
    §ue
     
    #6 I Am Blessed 24, Jan 13, 2004
  7. baptistteacher

    baptistteacher Member
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    Not only does God understand that you are hurting, so do we, your Christian family.

    As for God understanding that you need to vent, read Psalm 13. Here David feels that God has forgotten him, yet in the last 2 verses he finds hope in God's faithfulness.

    Sometimes it just takes us a while to get to "the last 2 verses." But you will, and God will be there waiting for you with open arms.
     
    #7 baptistteacher, Jan 13, 2004
  8. Eugenia

    Eugenia New Member

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    Thanks for believing in me. I really need to know that right now with everything going on. It is nice to know that i have a christian family here. I still feel like the lost soul looking for the right church. I still do not know where i belong. Last Sunday i took two of my grand children and went to the church where my husband and i were married and they loved it but the truth is i still have not found where it is that i really belong and what it is that God wants me to do. I know he has a plan and it will be revealed to me in his own time. May God bless each and everyone of you! In Christian Love, Eugenia
     
    #8 Eugenia, Jan 17, 2004
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