The bible and Divorce

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by evangelist6589, Aug 9, 2016.

  1. evangelist6589

    evangelist6589
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2010
    Messages:
    8,367
    Likes Received:
    105
    Got a friend whose wife filed legal separation on him. Can he file for divorce or should he in response? She has not cheated on him, but she is mentally ill and has anger issues. She causes him much stress due to her anger and unstableness. What are the exceptions for divorce that I can tell him?
     
  2. Don

    Don
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 7, 2000
    Messages:
    10,547
    Likes Received:
    212
    Can he? Yes.

    Should he? No. Matthew 19:6, 19:8-9.

    The only "exception" is sexual immorality.

    I would recommend counseling, either with a pastor and/or qualified counselor. If she won't go, he should go alone, if only to show his commitment to his wife, which should be the same as the commitment Christ has to the church.
     
    • Agree Agree x 3
  3. Rolfe

    Rolfe
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 17, 2014
    Messages:
    5,299
    Likes Received:
    394
    Adding to what Don wrote, "in sickness and in health" is a part of the Marital Vows.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  4. Van

    Van
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2011
    Messages:
    9,516
    Likes Received:
    49
    I am a little confused. If she divorces him then, he is the faithful spouse, and can remarry. If she does not divorce, and he has no biblical basis for divorce, then he should care for her as best he can.
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  5. Smyth

    Smyth
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2012
    Messages:
    758
    Likes Received:
    47
    It's his duty to try to reconcile and to find a way to deal with her mental illness. Why does he want to divorce her? Does he want to get remarried? If not, then, if nothing else, just live separated. And, if he wants to get remarried, his church should kick him out.

    (He needs to find another way to death with her, other than what he was doing in the past.)
     
  6. evangelist6589

    evangelist6589
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2010
    Messages:
    8,367
    Likes Received:
    105
    This may be what he needs to hear although he would rather go straight to the divorce.
     
  7. Jeremy Seth

    Jeremy Seth
    Expand Collapse
    Member

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2016
    Messages:
    70
    Likes Received:
    13
    Does Matthew 19:9 only say that remarriage after divorce is adultery except for sexual immorality, or divorce is adultery except for sexual immorality?
     
  8. Yeshua1

    Yeshua1
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2012
    Messages:
    17,080
    Likes Received:
    49
    Per the word of the Lord, only AdultERY/sexual sins, and abandment would apply, so he !needs to stay in this and seek out good Christian couseling aND PRAY FOR THE GRACE OF THE lORD, AND FOR gOD TO INTERVENE AND TOUCH HIS WIFE
     
  9. JonC

    JonC
    Expand Collapse
    Lifelong Disciple
    Moderator

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2001
    Messages:
    6,968
    Likes Received:
    371
    This is often more a difficult issue than it may at first appear (e.g.., is there a biblical warrant for an abused spouse to leave a mate?). Just like other issues (e.g., most who support corporal punishment do not do so strictly on biblical grounds) this one gets complicated, but at the end of the day the husband entered into a covenant with the wife (they are one) and even in the face of unfaithfulness divorce is not an automatic (we all were, at one time, unfaithful to God). From the information here, I'd say that the husband should fight to keep his marriage.
     
  10. evangelist6589

    evangelist6589
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2010
    Messages:
    8,367
    Likes Received:
    105
    Should he file for legal separation?
     
  11. Don

    Don
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 7, 2000
    Messages:
    10,547
    Likes Received:
    212
    No.

    He may not want to hear it, but you should have him look hard at the last half of Ephesians 5, starting with verse 25.
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  12. JonC

    JonC
    Expand Collapse
    Lifelong Disciple
    Moderator

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2001
    Messages:
    6,968
    Likes Received:
    371
    No. Marriage us not merely a secular contract between two people. I can't see how filing for separation would be any different from filing for devorce.
     
  13. evangelist6589

    evangelist6589
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2010
    Messages:
    8,367
    Likes Received:
    105
    That's my opinion but his pastor is encouraging legal separation even without a Biblical reason.
     
  14. Don

    Don
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 7, 2000
    Messages:
    10,547
    Likes Received:
    212
    His pastor is encouraging him to file for legal separation, or encouraging her to file for legal separation?
     
  15. evangelist6589

    evangelist6589
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2010
    Messages:
    8,367
    Likes Received:
    105
    Encouraging her.
     
  16. JonC

    JonC
    Expand Collapse
    Lifelong Disciple
    Moderator

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2001
    Messages:
    6,968
    Likes Received:
    371
    Sometimes there is more to things that meet the eye. I don't know the details (and do not want to know the details) but maybe there is a reason (a biblical reason) for this pastor's encouragement of the wife to leave of which we are unaware. That said, it is unfortunate that our culture has influenced our churches to the extent that it is often difficult to tel the difference between the world and the Church.
     
  17. Baptist Believer

    Baptist Believer
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 20, 2002
    Messages:
    6,655
    Likes Received:
    189
    If his safety is in danger, that may be warranted.

    I have a close relative who had a wife with severe mental issues. On more than one occasion, she physically attacked him - once with a large kitchen knife - and he was rightly concerned about sleeping under the same roof.
     
  18. evangelist6589

    evangelist6589
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2010
    Messages:
    8,367
    Likes Received:
    105
    Nothing that bad.
     

Share This Page

Loading...