This isn't what I was hoping for. Not what I thought it would be.

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by Bob in St. Louis, Oct 10, 2013.

  1. Bob in St. Louis

    Bob in St. Louis
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    Ya know. I'm a 'fourtysomething' who is doing my best to get myself and my family to Gods home. A bit over a year ago my wife and I chose to take our children to a Baptist Church. Her and I were raised Baptist, but drifted away from Church and God at a very young age. Our humble family of four were Baptized in a river by our Pastor whose desire was to perform a river Baptism.
    I even started a thread and posted pictures of the event on this board.

    I joined this forum as a tool to help me become a better man of God, and in turn help my family as well. My goal was to get started on the right foot with some (hopefully) new friends here. New friends that I could learn from, who could help teach me about Jesus. Who could answer a bunch of my dumb questions.

    Like most people, I have many hobbies. Most of those hobbies have forums, just like this one. Just a quick estimate, I probably have near 40,000 posts on those forums all told. That being said, I'm not a "noob" to forums, so I know how things work.

    To be quite honest, and probably a bit too blunt, I've heard more bickering and seen more confrontation here than I have on all of my other forums combined. I am truly saddened by this. With all of the non-Christian thoughts and acts I've had in the past few decades, I was hoping to start a new life with Christ and needed some help with that. That major change in my life included quite a few new things that took some major adjustments on my part, one of which included joining a Baptist forum.
    Truth be told, I've seen more stress, arguing, bickering, and borderline name-calling here than anywhere else.
    I've not seen much here that I think would help me on my difficult path.

    This place isn't what I was hoping for at all. There is no peace it seems. Last night I asked a "noob" question about something and I not only didn't get an answer but the thread continued on a few more pages with members pointing fingers at each other saying "you're not doing it right". It appeared the active members of that thread were too busy to take the time to answer my question.

    I would like to say that you folks should be ashamed of yourselves with the posts I've read in my short time here, but my comment won't carry any weight since I'm "nobody" here.

    At the end of the day, my goal will still be the same. I want my family and I to be closer to God. I would like to find a forum to join that would help me with that goal. I don't think it would be polite to have my Pastor on speed dial, as he would probably find the duty of single handedly teaching this heathen to become a better Christian a daunting task.

    So...if somebody could please help my find a calm sanctuary of Christ, in forum form, I would greatly appreciate it.

    Thank you in advance.
    Bob
     
  2. annsni

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    I will be perfectly honest Bob - I'd not look to a forum for discipleship. What you need is a man who is more mature than you in the faith, preferrably married with kids (to be able to counsel you from a place of experience) who will be able to meet with you weekly or biweekly to disciple you. While forums are fun, they are certainly not a great place for teaching and guiding since none of us know each other - or very few do. So take BB for what it is (a place for frustrated old Baptists to discuss and argue with each other) and get your teaching from someplace else. :)
     
  3. Winman

    Winman
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    Well Bob, you must understand that there are many aspects to this forum. There are debate forums where we purposely debate our differences. Yes, it is bickering, but it serves a purpose. As a new believer, you can look at the arguments and compare with scripture to determine what you believe is the truth. You are correct it is not often pleasant.

    But you are free to ask any questions you want, and I am sure many here will try to answer your questions. I saw your question in another thread, but I simply did not understand it, so I did not answer. If you will rephrase the question I will do my best to answer, and I am sure others will too.

    It takes time to learn this stuff. I have been a Christian for 50 years and I am still learning. So, try to be patient with us, and we will try to be patient with you.
     
  4. Bob in St. Louis

    Bob in St. Louis
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    Thank you Ann. Honesty stings sometimes, and this is certainly one of those times. That gives me something to think about.

    I appreciate your words. :thumbs:
     
  5. Bob in St. Louis

    Bob in St. Louis
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    Oh....one advantage of "internet anonymity", is that some things are easier to talk about when there's no face attached to it. Having somebody sitting a few feat from you may change your answer....in some situations. Ya know?
     
  6. SaggyWoman

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    This isn't church. You need to find you a small group of men to get involved with.
     
  7. Bob in St. Louis

    Bob in St. Louis
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    Winman, thank you. That makes sense. In hindsight, my wording is a bit odd, but being the noob that I am is my excuse, and that's the story I'm sticking to. :laugh:
    Not sure about all the "infighting" though. Sure seems rougher than I expected. I suppose I'll "come 'round".
     
  8. Bob in St. Louis

    Bob in St. Louis
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    Saggywoman (I have a difficult time typing that. haha) seems that's becoming the consensus. Thank you.
     
  9. SaggyWoman

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    Now, that is not to say there aren't good people here.

    Some I am friends with on facebook, and it is fun to be "a part" of their lives, such that even that is.
     
  10. annsni

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    I agree Saggy but honestly, there is nothing like the love, accountability and example that a good "discipler" can give. :) As far as any of us know, the person we're talking to through the screen could be someone completely different from what they bring forth!! But for me to meet with an older woman who has been where I am and who can teach me, encourage me, and even call me to the carpet when need be is invaluable!!!
     
  11. Winman

    Winman
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    Well, about half of the folks here are Calvinists, and the other half aren't. That is the biggest difference you will find here. I personally do not hold to Calvinism and you will find me fighting with Calvinists all the time. That is almost the only thing I do here, but I consider it important, and that is why I do it.

    Folks debate on other subjects too, drinking is popular. We fight over politics a lot as well.

    Believe it or not, even though we fight, I believe deep down most of us are good friends. I used to have knock down drag out fights with my two brothers when I was a kid, but you better not mess with one of us, or you would have three boys to fight. It is kind of like that here.
     
  12. SaggyWoman

    SaggyWoman
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    Yeah, I think if you took the argument away, most are great to know.
     
  13. Bob in St. Louis

    Bob in St. Louis
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    I understand your comment. I am a 43 year old man who has been married 23 years. My kids are 9 and 14 (see my posting history, and you'll see their photos during Baptism)
    However, not being honest with you folks here would not serve any purpose and would be a waste of my time. If I were a deviant with evil motives, I certainly would not choose a Christian forum to "stir the pot". I would be kicked off and banned in a heartbeat. I come before you all (and Christ, of course) seeking guidance and honesty. After all, we should all be on the same path.

    Please take me at face value and with a huge dose of modesty on my part.

    Bob

    p.s. I am beginning to feel bad about my previous 'rant'. With so many coming out and helping, it's surely making me look like an attention getter. Sorry about that.
     
  14. Bob in St. Louis

    Bob in St. Louis
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    I've seen the word "Calvinist" before, but don't know what it means. I'll check it out. Thanks again!
     
  15. Revmitchell

    Revmitchell
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    Don't feel bad you are not alone.
     
  16. Winman

    Winman
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    If you come here a couple of times a week, you will quickly learn what Calvinism is.
     
  17. Winman

    Winman
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    When I want attention, I post things like this;

    [​IMG]
     
  18. Bob in St. Louis

    Bob in St. Louis
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    Thanks for the laugh! :laugh:
     
  19. Winman

    Winman
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    See, it's not ALL bad around here.
     
  20. Bob in St. Louis

    Bob in St. Louis
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    haha. Thanks Winman.
     

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