Using Shame

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by SaggyWoman, Oct 17, 2005.

  1. SaggyWoman

    SaggyWoman
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    The other night I was at church helping to clean up from something, and the woman in charge was talking about the work she did trying to arrange for door prizes. She stated that at some businesses, she had to use the "tactic" of "shaming" them, or "making them feel guilty about not supporting work with senior adults."

    What do you think about using shame to get what you want?
     
  2. natters

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    You should shame her into not doing that anymore. ;)
     
  3. Johnv

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    I think it's a cheap slaseman tactic. This woman should be "ashamed" of herself for using this tactic in an ungodly manner.
     
  4. PamelaK

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    I think it's a terrible testimony. Someone should take her aside and talk to her about it.
     
  5. just-want-peace

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    That's one thing I've learned to sluff off as I gained a little wisdom with age.

    God is the one to please, not some do-gooder that thinks if you're not on board with his/her pet project that you're being "unchristian"!

    If that's their mental state, I couldn't care less if "they" think I should be ashamed.

    I've screwed up too many times thinking that someone else spoke with "the authority of God"!

    A pox on 'em! [​IMG]
     
  6. Benjamin

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    First, I’d have to know if it was something she wanted or something that God would want. (Door prizes?) A charitable cause perhaps WITH DOOR PRIZES??? Maybe! Then, if she only said something that was true of a need and it convicted their heart I would say good for her; except she added in a little gossip afterwards and shouldn’t have mentioned it because it showed pride and voided her reward. If it wasn’t 100% true or only to serve her own desires I would say shame on her.
     
  7. Repent62

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    Shame on her!!! [​IMG]


    Repent! [​IMG]
     
  8. Gib

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    I would be ashamed if I shamed someone into anything.
     
  9. Benjamin

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    Paul used shame, BUT NOT FOR DOOR PRIZES!:

    (1Co 6:5) I speak to your shame. Is it so, that there is not a wise man among you? no, not one that shall be able to judge between his brethren?

    (1Co 15:34) Awake to righteousness, and sin not; for some have not the knowledge of God: I speak this to your shame.
     
  10. SAMPLEWOW

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  11. SAMPLEWOW

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    JohnV we can and do agree sometimes.

    I think it is a shame that one would soil there testimony like that.
     
  12. John of Japan

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    The whole society here in Japan is based on shame, rather than right and wrong. I have a hard enough time trying to get them not to be ashamed of Jesus without trying to shame them into something. Japanese people get embarrassed at the drop of a hat, then they'll get embarrassed about the hat!

    As for Americans, just give them the truth, and if it fits they'll either be ashamed enough or further hardened. I don't find the giving of guilt trips in the Bible, myself.
     
  13. jshurley04

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    Shame is proper and useful in its proper context. But NEVER to get something for nothing, especially for the church.
     
  14. donnA

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    manipulation
     
  15. SaggyWoman

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    Paul spoke to the shame they already had. Paul didn't create or cause it.
     
  16. Thankful

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    It seems that some people who collect for charity try to use this method. The only reason is might work is that the people just want to get rid of them. It is not an effective means of getting donations.
     
  17. Brice

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    If they want donations they can go to their local christian bookstore. Many of these stores will donate slightly damaged products (such as a small mark, etc.) to these events. I know ours does and this does not require shame. [​IMG]
     
  18. Petrel

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    I remember a charity phone solicitor tried to do this to me a couple of years ago. He said that my neighbors were dying of lung cancer from smoking and it was MY FAULT. I was pretty sure I hadn't been going about piping cigarette smoke through their windows, so I didn't give him any money. :rolleyes:
     
  19. doodlebug

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    I do not think it's right to use shame to get donations. If someone doesn't give with the right attitude, then is it really a gift/donation? Not to me.

    What about a man using shame to put a woman "in her place" (not speaking of a husband and wife, but rather a man in the church speaking "down" to a woman)? I had someone in our church tell me that I didn't know "my place" because my husband willingly allows me to speak my mind so long as I am respectful and I do so according to the Bible. I do not speak out if my husband and I disagree on an issue. This man tried to shame me by saying that a woman should know "her place". God used women many times in the Bible, so why can't he use me? (By the way, I don't want to be a preacher or a deacon, but I speak my mind in regards to the ministries that I am involved in. A man that is in charge of a particular department feels threatened by me because I am working more with the ministry than he does. This is not on purpose, but by his choice -- his personal life takes higher priority over the ministry.)
     

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