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What causes a child to react hostile and/or violent?

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by stanleyg, Oct 25, 2006.

  1. DeeJay

    DeeJay New Member

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    I have no arguement that punishment is important. I am just saying that reward from parents is also important.

    Do they join gangs because they idolize idiots or do they idolize idiots for the same reason they join gangs?

    Agreed, one of them is lack of acomplishment and acknowlegement of success.

    I agree with you that dicipline may be the number one reason but if it is then lack of acknowleged good is a close second.

    Did I mention this is what I do for a living.
     
  2. UnchartedSpirit

    UnchartedSpirit New Member

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    These episodes should answer everything, as I recall:



     
  3. Helen

    Helen <img src =/Helen2.gif>

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    There has to be a balance between punishments and rewards. Both, however, show the parents' concern, and that is really important. However, all discipline without rewards will result in a child trying to escape. All rewards with no discipline gives you a spoiled brat who wants discipline. Both extremes will encourage kids to find something else, outside the home, which may well be in a gang.

    Also, "age of accountability" in the theological sense refers to spiritual accountability where the person and God is concerned. This is not part of this thread. As far as accountability of the person when he or she is growing up, it has everything to do with the relationship with the parents, the maturity of the child, and what behavior is expected at what age and whether or not the child understands that. So that makes it highly individual except for some very general guidelines where raising kids is concerned (for instance, forget trying to reason with a two year old! A simple 'no' and physical removal of him from the problem or the problem from him is about all you can do).

    Good parenting takes patience, love, and a HUGE amount of common sense and wisdom from God!
     
  4. genesis 12-15

    genesis 12-15 New Member

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    Excellent thread. Out of the OP, a good, healthy discussion. Thanks, Stanley.
     
  5. SBCPreacher

    SBCPreacher Active Member
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    You're not praying more kids on us, are you? My house is full, my checkbook's empty!
     
  6. 2BHizown

    2BHizown New Member

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    LOL, I so remember that feeling while awaiting our sixth many years ago!
    No, the meaning of course is that we need so many more with your commitment to God and His ways of teaching, caring families! Such a blessing to see truly God oriented families today and to know these treasured skills will be passed on and on for generations!
     
  7. El_Guero

    El_Guero New Member

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    Helen,

    I like your post. And while I agree that agitating children is like agitating kittens, children and adults have a responsibility. And they are not to be shot like rapid cats, so we should focus them upon better decision making.

     
  8. pinoybaptist

    pinoybaptist Active Member
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    True. And then again, there are fathers (and moms) who are violently disciplinary, if you know what I mean.
    The father yells at his kids, uses his fists, or sometimes his foot. The mom yells at her kids, and oftentimes reaches for the broom.
    They hear their parents say they are "good for nothing", "better to have died at birth", "tired of feeding you", and stuff like these.
    Many of these same kids join gangs because they feel respected by their peers (which the yelling parent failed to give), and both respected and feared by non-gangbangers.
    Or worse, they become solo-flying jekyll and hide serial killers.

    Either way, sin is still at the very root of the problem.

    Some 1920's and earlier gangsters I've read about when I was younger apparently (as hinted by their biographers) had preachers as dads or uncles, or some figure they highly respected within their families.
     
  9. rbell

    rbell Active Member

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    :laugh: :tongue3:

    Dang. I missed that cat too!

    "I would've bagged a dozen by now, but these cats are too doggone rapid."

    (not to be confused with rabid cats)
     
  10. Mary Diana Lynn Harper

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    what causes?

    Throughout the years I have noticed that children are more pron to violence. Myself I have 34 grandchildren. Lack of discipline in some of the homes that the children live in [my children's homes] is a big cause for the violence and disobedience in some of the children. the phrase in the Bible is true "spare the rod and spoil the child." violence begate violence, but a good swat on the rearend usually helps when a child is out of control.. It teaches that they must stop and realize what they are doing. Please don't give me that saying that that is beating a child. there is a big difference between beating a child and swating a child on the rearend. When my grandchildren come to my home, they are very respectful. When I go at their homes they are disrespectful to their parents because they have 'spoiled their children'. Some because of divorce and others just because, but when I show up at their homes the children know, 'don't do it in front of Grandma' they have learned throughtout the years that I believe in the Bible and all it has to offer where children are concerned, when they act up in front of me they face the conciquences. they have to listen to me preach Jesus and what Jesus would do in that situation. Smile it is not all bad to lecture them when they are bad. They hate that worse than getting a swat on the rearend. :laugh: :godisgood:
     
  11. El_Guero

    El_Guero New Member

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    Did I really miss that with spell check?

    :laugh:

    Good eye for an ole' codger!
     
  12. El_Guero

    El_Guero New Member

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    Sounds like a pistol packing granny . . .

    :saint:

     
  13. gb93433

    gb93433 Active Member
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    Society has not allowed the authority ot be the authority.

    The biggest complaint I had when I taught high school was from parents who thought I gave their kids too much homework and that kids should have fun in school.

    The reward of hard work is fun. Fun is not the objective. Learning is.
     
  14. Karen

    Karen Active Member

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    gb, I might have been one of them. Depends on how much homework you gave.

    Teenagers need around 9 hours of sleep a night. Factor in 7 hours in school, travel time to and from, chores, family dinner and other family time including devotions, church, reading, exercise, grooming, SOME time off. Usually 6 or more subjects in school. Maybe you were giving too much sometimes. (I was raised on a dairy farm too. But I admit it wasn't me getting up at 3:30. LOL)
     
  15. annsni

    annsni Well-Known Member
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    Our pastor was talking about a farmer's child's homework. Milking, mucking, feeding and such. LOL!! He was talking about his father not finishing 8th grade because he just couldn't do the schoolwork and farmwork together. ;)
     
  16. El_Guero

    El_Guero New Member

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    I still vote for sin (or agin' it depending on how you define for and agin it)
     
  17. vermae

    vermae New Member

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    I work in the school system and see children everyday.Some days they are fine and the next they are not.They see too much wrong in their homes.Some have to get up in the mornings andget themselves started "little people".They see their mothers with different men each night and instead of her fixing breakfast for them they have to get it in school.Who can blame them if some group comes along and shows them "love'.A bad start does not make a good ending.Most of the fault lies in the home.When I came up my parents started our day with prayer and a bowl of oatmeal we all grew up and we had our bad days but they were few and far between.Children need someone to lean on if they don't they will become hostile and violent and hard to deal with.:praying: :wavey: :type:
     
  18. 2BHizown

    2BHizown New Member

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    My early beginnings were as yours, oatmeal and prayer, every day, stable, consistent and unchanging! I never gave it so much thought until I started hearing tales as you shared. Now I look back, give thanks to the Lord and really cherish the headstart my parents gave me.
     
  19. El_Guero

    El_Guero New Member

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    I am not agin this:

     
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