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WHAT IS CONSIDERED GOSSIP?

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by Frenchy, May 4, 2006.

  1. donnA

    donnA Active Member

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    If you tell us anything that was said or done in a counseling session then it is personal information since the person being counseled believed it to be personal and private. Would that person want us all walking in and taking a seat and listening to the counseling session? After all we wouldn't know who they were, their name or anything unless one of you told us. And since you have a problem telling too much I am sure you'd let us know if we were there.
    Not to mention, if you are a paid counselor it is illegal.
     
  2. Ransom

    Ransom Active Member

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    Frenchy said:

    Just what i thought same people complaining.

    If you knew what answer you were going to get, why did you bother posting the question?

    I really have no use for the opinions of those who exult in their own unreason. Bye.
     
  3. ccrobinson

    ccrobinson Active Member

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    Bible-boy wrote:

    Frenchy posted:

    Bible-boy did a fine job of answering your challenge.

    Just because you don't accept the proof doesn't mean that the proof wasn't presented.
     
  4. bapmom

    bapmom New Member

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    I do have a question here. Lots of times we do give instances of things that have happened to us. Especially here on this board. Invariably those stories involve other people. What is the line there in determining that we are sharing too much? When does it become gossip?

    There are whole posts on things that are happening in people's churches, things that are said in meetings, and cases being laid out of situations going on.....usually the person is asking for advice on how to deal with it. I know Ive done this, and Im wondering now about it.

    Is it gossip if the person is asking for advice? With my kids if they are asking me for advice on how to deal with it than Im not thinking they are gossiping to me.

    What do you all think?
     
  5. rbell

    rbell Active Member

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    Frenchy, it's time for me to post a bit here.

    I don't remember a thread in which you were heavily involved in which you didn't get upset and claim that someone is out to get you. When people have pressed you to back up your posts, give more information, etc., I have seen you on several occasions launch personal attacks, play the victim, make baseless claims, and even question the salvation of another poster.

    Have their been occsasions I have gotten sideways? Yep...I've even had a post or two edited (my bad mods!). But I daresay I don't get all heated up in every thread. And in most threads I see where your name is prominent, you do.

    It seems to me that the indictments you level against the BB in general and "many of its members" are getting more and more strident. I forsee a showdown in which you'll be offered an ultimatum...if things don't improve.

    Let's take a deep breath, count to ten, and interact with the BB posting community in a constructive way. There's lots of good folks in here. And me too.
     
  6. Frenchy

    Frenchy New Member

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    Right bapmom, i guess you have been away for awhile and haven't seen what is going on. it is always the same people who like to stir the pot and claim i am doing things wrong that i am not. you are right i know i don't need to defend myself, everyone knows how sillly their remarks are.

    I would think gossip would be putting me down and my post and talking to each other about it in pm's and private forums which i know is done.

    The comment i made fit perfectly into the discussion at hand if they don't like it then they should not allows such topics.
     
  7. donnA

    donnA Active Member

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    LOL, you haven't been mentioned once in the WPF.
     
  8. Karen

    Karen Active Member

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    Frenchy,
    This is my opinion:
    Reread rbell's post just above mine.

    As to why one was and one wasn't gossip, actually, I think they both were.
    I see a difference between something presented as a hypothetical question, generally stated, versus "This is happening to me now." With all kinds of details.

    In the past, a number of such kinds of posts as Carolina's have been edited or deleted by moderators when it was too easy to follow profiles and figure out people. It is a judgment call, and sometimes it takes a while for a moderator to make that judgment call. They don't live here.

    As to why you were admonished and Carolina wasn't, you have an antagonistic style.
    It is obvious that you get antagonized by several of the posters you mentioned. And you demand a response from them and call them by name.

    It may not be right, but it is a fact in life that you can get away with more if you are new and if you seem to be asking for help rather than seeming to make an attack. People are more likely to give you the benefit of the doubt then.

    Karen
     
  9. donnA

    donnA Active Member

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    LOL, you haven't been mentioned once in the WPF.
    You can not defend yourself by complaining about others, their actions have nothing to do with you sharing private privileged information with us. What you are trying to do is get the focus off you and your unethical treatment of those you counsel.
     
  10. Joshua Rhodes

    Joshua Rhodes <img src=/jrhodes.jpg>

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    Since I've responded to Frenchy before, I'm probably considered part of "the same people responding," but I'll answer anyway.

    After reading the two posts in question, something was bothering me about it, and I couldn't tell what it was. Thankful's post was right on the head. One was first hand, one was not, and therein lies the rub. Also, I'll agree with the privacy breach comment.

    Just my humble opinion that was requested by the OP.
     
  11. Karen

    Karen Active Member

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    Joshua,
    You and Thankful make a good point, but I think I disagree.
    I can still gossip even if it is first hand.

    It is a fine line, indeed. Bapmom raises a good question, that I don't entirely know how to answer.

    Karen
     
  12. Frenchy

    Frenchy New Member

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    Go the Anonymous letter thread and see if both posts were not appripiate? they were and you can also see who are the ones starting the attacks they have NEVER been me. and no the mod was there all night along with another 2 more in fact it was a mod who questioned me in the first place. I will not take certain individuals poat as valid and you know who you are. so far only 2 people have written on here that i would even consider their remarks.
     
  13. Frenchy

    Frenchy New Member

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    Guess honesty isn't the best policy on this board.
     
  14. donnA

    donnA Active Member

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    bapmom, the problem is that Frenchy got her story from a private counseling session, it has nothing to do with her life, she is not involved in anyway with the happenings of the story, but has breached privileged trust with the one she is counseling.
    If you wen to someone for counseling and trusted them with private information about you and your life, would you want them to share that information with others not involved?
     
  15. donnA

    donnA Active Member

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    Ok, I've seen some double posting probelms on the BB today, we once had a problem where almost every post was doubled.
     
  16. Joshua Rhodes

    Joshua Rhodes <img src=/jrhodes.jpg>

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    Keep that attitude up, Frenchy, and no one will even bother responding to you anymore. You asked for my opinion, and then tell me you don't care what I think? Did you have expired milk in your corn flakes this morning?
     
  17. Joshua Rhodes

    Joshua Rhodes <img src=/jrhodes.jpg>

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    Karen, that's fine that you don't agree with me. That's just my opinion. Hope that's ok. You didn't have to disagree with me ALL those times!! [​IMG]
     
  18. Carolina

    Carolina New Member

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    Hi Everyone

    I want to make an attempt to understand possibly why Frenchy's post is getting so much negative attention and mine not getting equal.

    1. It was my first post, there are no back posts to research to learn information. They are giving me the benefit of the doubt.

    2. The situation I speak of is more general. A Pastor speaking outloud to a church about an anonymous letter concerning others living arrangements is not common in my eyes. I am not a Counselor.
    3. I said I likely won't be posting much as I usually like to just read the posts. This was a precaution taken so no one could identify me later by researching posts.

    4. I added I originally wrote the anonymous note out of concern for my safety. I don't have an obligation to mention it on the world wide web so maybe that was a bad judgement call on my part. I just didn't want any Pastors to disregard anonymous notes without considering it could be a possible safety issue regarding their church as to why it wasn't signed. Sometimes it's good to just be aware.


    For the record, Carolina is a nickname. I also altered my BB profile to change the name of my church seconds after I hit the post button. I did not technically put the correct town in my profile, though I live not too far from there. I don't even know if there is a First Baptist in Sacramento. So I may get kicked out but I wanted to post it because I was concerned about Pastors disregarding ALL notes because of the ill intent of the majority. The person I spoke of does not live in my town either. No one who attended my study knows I am baptist. Soon, they will learn. If asked what I do for a living by anyone, I don't tell anyone what I is on my profile because I am not involved in that business much. It is not where my heart is or what I consider my work each day. Most people don't even know about that business.

    For anyone to go to a Counselor over others living arrangements in their church and whether the Pastor approves of it seems a bit odd. I have re-red the notes, and it still feels odd. If I felt the Pastor approved of living in sin, I would just find another church to attend.
    Just my two cents worth here....
     
  19. Karen

    Karen Active Member

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    Sorry, folks.
    I have had this problem yesterday and today from two different email accounts.

    The BB page comes up blank or web page unavailable then it quadruple posts.

    Karen
     
  20. Carolina

    Carolina New Member

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    Maybe it's a virus
     
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