what we are teaching kids

Discussion in 'Baptist Theology & Bible Study' started by TaterTot, Jan 27, 2007.

  1. TaterTot

    TaterTot
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    As many of you are aware, I teach at a private Christians school. Yesterday, I had a student that was leaving our school and she threw her books in the trash that didn't have to be turned back in. One was called "Sex, Love, and Romance: Sex Education from the Bible" by Hugh F. Pyle and was produced from Pensacola Christian College. I asked her if I could have it, as I was interested in what they were learning as 8th graders about God's plan for their lives in that area.

    While it does teach many godly principles to teenagers, I was very bothered by many of the statements I found. I thought I would share them here to see if maybe I am just way of base or what.

    1)"God planned for sex to have pleasure associated with it so the human race would not become extict and to assure that the earth would be poplutated with people. God made food to taste good and be appealing to the human race and that man would have a desire to eat and by eating, man would be heathy and live longer."

    2) Then in reference to Isaac and Rebekah (Gen 26:8) the king "looked out and saw that Isaac was sporting with Rebekah.. Isaac was sporting with Rebekah, meaning he was pampering, petting - probably kissing his wife. Husbands and wives who love each other do have a wonderful 'sporting' time, ..but usually we find it proper and discreet to do such lovemaking indoors with the shades drawn."

    3) In reference to fornication - he uses the illustration of Eli's sons who were so evil. God rebuked their father and killed them because of their "terrible sin of fornication"...."Fornication is not to be once named (or considered) among God's children.It is filthy and along with it goes other kinds of filthiness (Eph 5:3-5) People who look at that which is filthy, tell dirty jokes, or listen to filthy music will soon BE filthy and will be engaged in the terrible sin of fornication"

    Theses are just a few...

    I am bothered by what we are teaching our young people.
     
  2. PastorSBC1303

    PastorSBC1303
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    You should be bothered. That kind of thinking is ridiculous and damages the minds and lives of our children. Then we wonder why when they get a taste of freedom they rebel into all sorts of things.

    Sounds to me like you can summarize that line of thinking as: Dont talk about sex, don't think about sex, and most of all if you do have sex in marriage make sure it is for procreation and the shades are completely shut.

    Christians today need to stop passing on this mindset to our kids, we are really going to mess their minds up about sex.
     
  3. donnA

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    It would help if you told us what you find wrong with these.
    From what I see, not kowing the rest of the book or anything,
    1. Animals have sex only for reproduction, never anyother time. People, in a marriage situation, not just reproduce, but sex is an expression of love between a man and his wife. I see that as one reason sex is 'pleasurable'.
    I may not be addressing what you are in this quote though.

    2. Not sure the problem, But I believe their defination may be off,
    Strong's
    H6711
    A primitive root; to laugh outright (in merriment or scorn); by implication to sport:—laugh, mock, play, make sport.
     
    #3 donnA, Jan 27, 2007
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 27, 2007
  4. Scarlett O.

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    As an educator, who has taught has taught this subject before (but not from this book), I think I understand what they are trying to say. It just doesn't come out with the whole story.

    God did say, "Be fruitful and multiply." And He did say that only married people were to be having sex and he did say that children are a blessing.

    All of those thing are true. But that's kind of where they've stopped here. And they have made a link with marital sex and procreation only. I think they've missed a good opportunity here, especially from a christian point of view, to teach these young people that sex is also pleasurable to create and maintain a bonding like no other between a husband and a wife.

    I think that they also missed an opportunity to teach these young people that the devil is out to destroy marriages. Husbands and wives, due to jobs, responsibilities, in-laws, child-rearing, stress from overdue bills, and just the day to day problems that they have to face together, can find their own relationship on shakey ground if they don't reaffirm their committment to each other and their vow to face life as one flesh.

    Sex is not the only way that husbands and wives bond and/or reaffirm bonds, but it's important.

    The bible says that "the wife's body belongs to the husband and the husband's body belongs to the wife" and that they are not to abstain from sex unless mutually agreed upon and that they are not to deny each other.

    That doesn't sound like procreation only to me.

    I think that people who write material like this and others who teach their own children this type of thinking are afraid that if their young people learn something about the pleasure of sex for a husband and wife in terms of bonding, emotional healing, tension release, comfort, or just for the plain old heck of it, will be tempted.

    Our young people are already tempted. They need to understand the role that sex plays in God's plan for husbands and wives. And it isn't for procreation only.

    As far as the food reference is concerned, there are a LOT of foods out there that taste wonderful....almost divine.....and those food do NOT promote a Godly healthiness and long life. In fact, those foods are killing humanity.

    The food analogy was not the best analogy.
     
    #4 Scarlett O., Jan 27, 2007
    Last edited: Jan 27, 2007
  5. Scarlett O.

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    Again, I understand what they are trying to say, but it doesn't come out the whole truth.

    We do teach young people that public displays of affection between teenagers are unacceptable in school. And in the South, there are many mothers who say things to their daughters like, "Now Betty Ann - if I ever catch you draped all over a boy like Roberta Conway's daughter Martha Jo drapes all over that Tompkins boy.....well, girl,....I'm gonna slap you into next week!"

    You have to be from the South to understand what being "draped" all over a boy means! :laugh:

    But there is absolutely no harm in husbands and wives publically kissing, holding hands, or "sporting" in general. I think common sense prevails here as to what is appropriate behavior and what is inappropriate behavior between two married adults in public.

    And another thing.....how on earth will children and teenagers learn that sex is not something dirty and ugly if they never see their parents touching each other or kissing each other or acting as if they could just eat each other up! :love2:

    One more thing.....Donna mentioned that we differ from animals in that sex is an expression of love for people and animals have sex for procreation only.

    I agree that we are different from animals, but if you look at some animals, especially those that mate for life or at least the entire mating season, there is a lot of affection displayed.

    Some mated animals do a lot of shared personal grooming, non-sexual touching, rubbing faces together, cuddling, cooing, sleeping snuggled against each other, and such as that.

    I said that to say this. There are many married couples who do not have sex because they can't. Physical reasons, medication reactions, age issues, .....whatever. But they do participate in non-intercourse sexuality. Just like certain animals, all of the above behaviors are just as important to them as well as sexually active married couples.

    If sex were truly for procreation only, then these behaviors which are just as important to married people as intercourse wouldn't be that big of a deal.

    I think that Isaac and Rebekah's non-intercourse behavior....the cuddling and the kissing and the "sporting".....proves that physical relations between a husband and wife are not for procreation only.
     
  6. TaterTot

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    I know the intentions are good and the book teaches some good principles. However, I think we often are pushing our kids toward temptation rather than equipping them to stand firm through it. We are teaching them that God is going to "get them" if/when they mess up.

    The author refers to "fornication" (which he says is the same as adultery) as the scarlet sin. (Sorry, Scarlett O! lol) Over and over he refers to that and how a simple kiss is going to plunge you into the scarlet sin.

    I just think we are teaching them to abstain our of fear rather than out of obedience and desire to wait to experience those things fully with the mate God has for them. We teach that sex is bad, bad, bad, then one day, you have a license and apiece of paper and you are supposed to go enjoy. Thats pretty difficult, at least to the female conscience.
     
  7. tinytim

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    I like the book "60 things God said about sex"

    http://www.internationalbibles.com/catalog/books/whitaker/0883687704.htm
    It is the book we gave all our graduating students from Elementary Sunday School into Middle School.... And before all you blue-hairs get all out of whack... it was their 80 year old elementary teacher that suggested we did.

    Kids need to know the truth in Middle School... By the time they get to High School they could have already lost their virginity.
     
  8. Scarlett O.

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    The "scarlet sin"! Ha!! :laugh: :eek: :laugh:

    I agree, TaterTot, that abstaining out of fear of doing something dirty or dread of being labeled as a bad girl (or boy) is not the right reason to abstain. And I believe with all of my heart that being taught that sex is filthy can cause emotional confusion and sometimes sexual dysfunction when married.
     
  9. TaterTot

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    Thats my whole point here. We are setting them up for failure. I think about this alot as I do not want my daughters and other young girls that I love to struggle with this area of their lives, but I do want them to be informed from a biblical perspective.
     
  10. annsni

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    There is another excellent book that i'm reading on this right now - Teaching True Love to a Sex at 13 Generation, by the Ludy's. Well worth reading if you have kids or work with them.
     
  11. El_Guero

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    Tater,

    I am troubled by what you posted . . . but, I am not certain that I could 'write better' for teenagers.

    Being a teacher is a difficult profession.
     
  12. abonmarche'

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    What Are We Teaching Kids?

    Did I miss your point of view of teaching? I read the postings and I think you all missed what God created us to do. It seems you lost the point of teaching similar to when Jesus talked to the Samerian girl at the Well! What was the point? The point Jesus had a job to do by the Father. All of you who have accepted Christ as your saviour has an obligation to teach all folks our good news. I love math but does that allow me to teach--NO! Why? Man has chosen paper to justify teaching. So, back to the well we go. I am not going thru that scripture because you all know it. But I will go to Jeremiah 2:13. Oh my! it is the Well! What you guys are chating and murmuring about is the actions of unsaved folks teaching our children. STOP! Jesus said in verse 13 that MY people have committed two evils. It is a frenzie of you all feasting on the cistern. Look in the dictionary to see what a cistern does! Their function is to leak out! What does a fountain do? It flows out water continuely and people drink of it for a human to live by. BUT it is Gods WORD in the bible we need to adhere to. NOW about this teaching issue. I have been to a fair number of churches. Yep they all have a cook book they go by to teach the same thing all over --year after year. Our kids want refreshing NEW ideas. Give it to them. Teach the new math to them. Do not be like the British teaching and cook book for those that can not get it. JUst like the Irish and South Koreans folks that were underminded by another power system to styme folks. teach differently-- math example: 72-5 = what. Stop no carrying. Do not go the Brits way of carry one from a seven to make the 2 a 12. It is hard especially in thousands and billions. Have the 2 drop down and add it with the 5 to add to the -5 and make a 10 so that we have a 5 plus a 2 == 7 on column next subtract the 10 from the 70= 60 or a six and add that to the next column and makes the answer 67. Walla! Your brain can do that faster. God said you your tallents. He also said that the world is his foot stool. Gee wiz folks my great garand child figured that out. God is huge! I guess so since heaven has not a bottom nor a top nor any sides of East nor A West! So, when we get to heaven we will be monsterous in size--unfathonable. Do not believe me---then do Eistiens theory. That is why age and our stars and planet is expanding.God is not a liar. He is holy and uses math. All trees multiply themselves--it is his law not ours. So, thing about teaching our kids beievers in Jesus the world is there for them to conquer.
     
  13. El_Guero

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    Abonmarche

    Welcome to the board.

    I admit that I do not completely understand your post, but what I can understand sounds very intellectual.

    God bless

    Wayne
     
  14. TaterTot

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    well, teaching math and teaching a Godly view of sex are totally different ball games. I am not sure I understand where you are coming from either.

    Welcome aboard, abonmarche.
     
  15. PastorSBC1303

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    ummmmm ... :confused:

    uhhhh... :confused:

    What in the world does all that mean and how does it relate to the OP? :confused:
     
  16. El_Guero

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    WHEW! This time I am not the only one to misunderstand . . .

    ;)

    But, back to your original OP - we live in very difficult times. And it is scary that our 'best' is often so little.

    I am scared for the next generation.

     
  17. Helen

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    When I was teaching (both homeschool and as administrator of our own private school with other teachers and students involved), there is something I explained to the older kids (jr hi and up) which I have not heard mentioned by others, but which the kids have thanked me for as adults.

    It seems that God has put into the physical world all kinds of symbols of spiritual truths. Jesus talked about grape vines and harvests and things the people were familiar with everyday to explain spiritual truths. We can look at the Bible and see the Ark is a 'type' of Christ -- get on or get dead...

    When I weed the yard, I can see the weeds as examples of bad habits. Get them out before they get big and hard to remove.

    So, if physical things are a picture of spiritual things, at least mostly, then could sex itself be a picture of something?

    I think it is. We read in the OT that Adam 'knew' his wife and she conceived. If we look at John 17, we see that Jesus defines eternal life as 'knowing' the Father and the Son. Obviously neither of these are referring to intellectual knowledge, but rather a very close, intimate relationship.

    When a man enters a woman and she conceives, a new life starts.

    When Christ enters a person and that person is born again, a new life starts.

    It is very possible that the sexual relationship is, for human beings, not just a physical procreation thing, and not just a pleasure thing, but the one and only picture that God has given us of the relationship the Christian has with God Himself.

    If that is true, then it explains why Satan is so driven to present sex out of marriage, in any way, shape, or form, as not only acceptable but desireable. It destroys the picture God has given us of the relationship man and God can have spiritually.

    We dealt with STD's, emotional damage, and the rest, but talking to the kids who have long since gone on to other areas of life, when I hear from them today, that is the 'talk' about sex they all seemed to have remembered and which evidently made the biggest impression on at least some of them.
     
  18. abonmarche'

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    What are we teaching kids.

    What are we teaching kids is the "OP". So what yuou folks do not understand. It all started by a paper certified teacher who explains herself as a believer of utilizing a non belivers point of view is my understanding. Also when this teacher was hired --this person has to perform under certain constrants. Even to deal with folks like unbelievers points of view or doctrines. All mans stuff. Simple. Issue was the well issue Jesus was teaching on a one to one--while his disciples left the area to buy or purchase food inside a town market. My point is we believers need to not question the cistern points and move onto fountain. Gods word is the Fountain of LIFE. I gave you all scripture on that issue. Next--teachers in chruches are also hindered by teaching by their doctrines. Again the cistern issue. Some question my great grand daughters point of view. Mathematically it is so. Isaian 66:1 Said that the heavn is my throne and the earth is my footstool. Hello, math.
    It amazes me that the hubble intensifies the opening of heaven to show the intensity of light in one of our constellations making us soooo sooo insignafant. yet you all feel that you are giants. I do not get it.
    Have we not smashed an atom. Have we not captured a part of the electron since we demolished the neutron and protron and called it a radical? Have we not got the radical smashed and got all these quarks? Have we not smahed and seperated the quark and gotten the muions? Have we not broken the muions down to pi's and found them to be triune? and each triune gotten a octagone? and each point of the octagon is now a light? Light of the rain bow. each its own? We have never beeen able to explain in math the light nor decribe it. Now the USA folks are hollering that we can not do this! why it might be a human? Thsi is what teaching is about. We look at little stuff which God called dust. and NOT him. What does it gain us? We spend billions of dollars because some man in the government said it is not dust and a living cell. Now we are projecting the cell or quark of an electron into outer space to a satelite to a third world country to then propel it around our world to another station and again to other point to mathematically get a half life. To prove it is dust and not a living cell. So, you all get it yet?
     
  19. gb93433

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    The emotional damage is one thing that few churches and schools talk about.
     
  20. Scarlett O.

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    Helen, I believe that very thing to be true.

    I'm so glad to hear someone who has worked with young people say this. I believe it and I am sure that TaterTot has seen this, too.

    So much of their information and exposure to ideas about sex is immoral, unGodly, and incorrect to the point of being a recipe for disaster. And here is what I discovered many times. They knew it. They knew their information was immoral and incorrect and craved the truth.

    They are bombarded with what MTV and R-rated movies and vile TV programs tell them about sex. And I have taught at a Christian school, too, and these children are no more safe from the media than anyone else.

    The young people that I have worked with using a secular abstinence plan were so grateful that someone just would talk to them about the truth. They craved truthful biological facts about their bodies. They craved moral integrity in terms of how abstaining can creat such a better life and how becoming sexually active before marriage can create tragedy - not only in physical terms, but in emotional/mental terms. They craved someone to listen to them and answer their questions without laughing at them and without scorning them, no matter how ignorant their questions were.

    Children and young people need to know the truth of God's plan for marriage and as you pointed out, God's picture of His relationship with His people.

    And whether parents want to know or believe this or not, our children and young people have got the devil's plan memorized and his picture is ever present in their minds.
     

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