what would you teach to your kids?

Discussion in '2004 Archive' started by number, Aug 5, 2004.

  1. number

    number
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    hello,

    I'm a new born christian, converted from the Roman catholic chruch. I'd like to ask a question to everybody here.
    I was discussing with my girlfriend about future and values.
    I want to teach them the Bible and teach them the difference
    between right and wrong based on what we have from Bible. I dont want
    them to be scared of showing what they believe in. Family is really big
    to me. I want my family (meaning my wife and kids) to be very close
    to each other. Meaning spending alot of time on the weekend and holidays
    together making life long memories. I want hoidays to be filled with the
    whole extended family (moms, dads, aunts, uncles, counsins,
    grandparents). I think family comes first before alot of things
    In your opinion which are the values to teach to your kids?
    So i guess what im asking is, what would you teach you kids?
     
  2. Su Wei

    Su Wei
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    hello! [​IMG]

    And Amen to your conversion! Praise His name!

    It is an awesome task, and privilege, to raise children for the Lord.

    First of all, your personal walk and testimony is everything. They won't learn what we have to teach them about the Bible when we are living inconsitently to the Bible.

    As a father, you are to be the model of their Heavenly Father! What an awesome responsibility!

    As a family set on raising children who will grow up to be useful to the Lord, we try our best to fulfil Deuteronomy 6:5-7

    And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.

    Well, there maybe many failings in this weak flesh of ours as parents, but this verse is key to the all consuming task of teaching our children about God. With God's help, we seek to do this.

    And what a joy it is to introduce to our children the Living God! [​IMG]
     
  3. Debby in Philly

    Debby in Philly
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    Greetings, and welcome! You are to be commended for being concerned about these things even before you have children of your own. That shows a great deal of maturity and responsibility.

    My advice is three-part. First, kids learn by example. So seeing mom and dad living the way the Bible teaches is the main way your children will learn.

    The next important thing is to make your family an active part of a Bible-believing church. Attending Sunday School and services EVERY week, and participating in all age-appropriate activities. As a Sunday School teacher I see too many kids whose families are only marginally involved, and so the kids attend once every two or three weeks or so. It seems they come to church only if they do not have something else to do that seems more important. We teach with planned lessons, that build on a topic or value each week, in logical sequence. So how can these kids benefit from that without continuity?

    The third thing would be to have your kids attend an evangelical Christian School, if possible. There is nothing sadder than the confusion kids are faced with when what they are taught in school is in direct opposition to what they read in the Bible and hear taught at church. If a Christian school is not an option, then providing kids with the truth at home when their school is teaching otherwise is important.

    Being an example, having a family church life and a Christian education are the three most important things you can do for your children in the area of values and learning how to live a life that honors the Lord.
     
  4. Gina B

    Gina B
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    We all very often have such high hopes and great resolutions for how we will raise our kids.
    Things don't always work out the way we planned. Jobs, illness, fights with a spouse, so many things can ruin the best of intentions.

    There are a few things I have always stuck with no matter what when it comes to my children. Here are the main ones, not it any particular order.

    1. We all owe it to ourselves and our world to make it a better place. When thinking of what you'll do with your life, don't only think of what would be best for you, think of what talents you have that you would like to use AND that will help make the world a better place.

    2. (kinda goes along with three) Learning is key to all we do in life. Getting passing grades in classes is not enough. We must diligently study what is available to learn, and learn how to use the information we come across. If asked why it is important to learn, my kids will reply "because we need to be able to know enough to make our world a better place".

    3. God is a fact, not an idea that some people have and some people don't. He is at the center of everything we learn.

    4. Family is family. It is never good to hurt someone, physically, verbally, or otherwise, and that goes double for members of this family. If a member of this family needs to be defended you will defend them. I've also made it a goal to be honest but never badmouth their dad around them. (we are divorced)

    5. Charity is a part of life. Having "stuff" is nice, but people in need come before you buying something you don't need.

    6. If you dislike someone don't ignore them, get to know them. Be their friend. Do things for them and with them. It's very hard to hold ill feelings toward someone once you truly get to know them and understand who they are and why.

    Gina
     
  5. number

    number
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    hello and thanks for the answers.

    I've recently discussed about these issues with my girlfriend, and her big fear is that we're coming from different background and how this could affect our children.
    "One thing that i have been thinking about for a while is i dont really
    know italian traditions or rituals. I mean like how you celebrate
    things, what are certain days that you celebrate. What do you do on
    these days? Are they the same as ours? I think im somewhat scared of
    loosing mine (for example, tranditions at thanksgiving, christmas,
    easter). Would you ever want me to change mine to yours? I dont think i
    could ask you to change yours to mine...i dont think that would be fair.
    so would there be a combination? i know its alot of questions but its
    alot of thoughts going through my mind.
    And one more thing...this i have been thinking about for a while and you
    can wait to respond to this if you want. its kinda a big question...do
    you think it would be hard to raise children from two different culture
    backgrounds? I know we have talked about our values and most to them are
    the same but which cultural values would you teach them? like the
    christmas', easters, thanksgivings ect. I think im scared about big
    disagreements on these issues to come up later on if we were to get to
    this point. Because raising kids is very important and very crucile"
    -------------
    ok I believe that if we have the same values in life, the fact that I'm Italian would just mean something more for our kids, not something less, I mean the language and the tradition.
    What do you guys think about this?
    thank you for listening
     
  6. Joseph_Botwinick

    Joseph_Botwinick
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    I would teach them the Scripture.

    I would teach them the value of hard work.

    I would teach them to love God and his word.

    Joseph Botwinick
     
  7. Joseph_Botwinick

    Joseph_Botwinick
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  8. Gina B

    Gina B
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    Yes, it's hard enough to be married to someone from a different culture, let alone raise children. I don't recommend attempting it at all unless you're a very strong person and ready to face all the challenges that come along with true commitment.
    Some of the things can be melded. I am an American Christian with a Jewish background who married someone from China who believed in Buddha. (I wasn't a Christian at the time)
    I couldn't begin to tell you the things that changed. We didn't exactly do any of them normal. We ate latkes with chopsticks and held off on celebrating New Years until Feb.when it could be combined with the Chinese New Year.
    We made our own new unique traditions that worked for all of us, blending the best parts of what we both liked about our own.
    I refused to accept jade replicas of false gods as jewelry for my children, but allowed jade jewelry and one "good luck charm".

    Don't stress it too much. Your in laws will do a lot of the arguing FOR you guys. ;)
    Gina
     
  9. Word Traveler

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    Ditto! I would only add to this the golden rule! In Christ, WT [​IMG]
     
  10. number

    number
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    Thanks everybody for your support and advices.
    I'm interested to have opinions about this: in our last emails with my girlfriend, we were discussing a lot about serious issues, like what values I wanted to give to my children, family, ordinary life during marriage, my own values and so on.
    She was asking me all these questions probably to make sure that my answers were what they she was hoping.
    And in fact she loved all my answers, she was very happy about everything I said about family, kids and values.
    Now, we're in a moment of our life in which she is deciding what to do with our relationship, whether to move it at a more serious level or not.
    But then, at the end of her emails there is always this recurrent idea, first she tells me how much she misses me, love me and wanted to be with me, and then she goes like " But there is
    so much that I have going for me here that I still have to think about that too."
    My point is, if she truly liked my values, and all the important aspects I mentioned above, why would she keep taking time?
     
  11. Su Wei

    Su Wei
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    Hey Gina! [​IMG]

    Is your husband saved now?
    What's his family name?
     

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