Which Church would you join Church A or Church B

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by DeaconPhil, Mar 23, 2011.

  1. DeaconPhil

    DeaconPhil
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2011
    Messages:
    36
    Likes Received:
    0
    You've recently moved into a new area and you have been to just about every Baptist and Like minded church in town. You've narrowed your search down to two churches. You need to make a choice. Here are your two choices and you MUST pick one!

    Church A:
    1. Baptist Church: Southern Baptist Association Member Church
    2. The church body is very loving and you really feel a connection with them.
    3. The pastor is not a "deep" preacher, although his sermons are biblically accurate.
    4. The music program and worship time are what you would consider close to perfect; good blend of traditional and contemporary music and top notch orchaestra/band.
    5. The pastor doesn't believe in church discipline, even though there is a church discipline section in the church constitution.
    6. The pastor allows membership candidates who promise to be baptized within 3 months full church membership rights.

    Church B:
    1. Independent Baptist: Textus Receptus/KJV Only
    2. Church congregation is cordial, reserved, standoffish. You struggle to make connections in this church body.
    3. The music is very traditional only singing out of a hymnal.
    4. The pastor has legalistic tendencies (i.e. thinks women should wear skirts, equates drinking alcohol with adultery, considers Liberty University and Bob Jones University liberal colleges).
    5. Here's the kicker....The pastor is the best preacher/teacher you've ever heard. The pastor is also a very deep studier and thinker of the Bible you always learn something new about the scriptures under his teaching/preaching ministry.
    6. You've also developed a love for the pastor's family and the assistant pastor and his wife.

    Okay there you have it! Please make a choice and tell me why or why not you made that choice.

    Thanks,
    Phil

    P.S. yes, this is a true story and yes it's my story.
     
    #1 DeaconPhil, Mar 23, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 23, 2011
  2. historyb

    historyb
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2009
    Messages:
    407
    Likes Received:
    0
    I would choose A
     
  3. North Carolina Tentmaker

    North Carolina Tentmaker
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2003
    Messages:
    2,355
    Likes Received:
    0
    A no doubt about it. I would try to maintain a relationship with the other pastor and assistant, but if they are as legalistic as you would lead to believe they probably would disown me.

    The lack of discipline in church A is bothersome, but not nearly as much as the attitude of church B.

    The KJVO would be a deal breaker for me. That pluse the leagalistic tendancies of the pastor would lead me to believe that his doctrinal errors are wide spread and I would have trouble learning from him.

    This may be your story Phil but it is not rare at all. I have twice joined churches where the membership was reserved and standoff ish as you describe. Both times I had a great respect and love for the pastor, and in both cases it ended in disaster. You need an entire church family and if the family isn't healthy it should send you a warning about their leader. Both times I felt called and burdened to help the pastor make a difference and change the church. That is kind of like marrying someone and thinking you will change them, it just don't happen.
     
    #3 North Carolina Tentmaker, Mar 23, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 23, 2011
  4. Thousand Hills

    Thousand Hills
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2010
    Messages:
    1,488
    Likes Received:
    4
    I would choose A from what you have described, although the issue with church discipline may be a problem, the pros seem to outweigh the cons.

    A couple of questions:

    How long have you been visiting each? It sounds like you have the scoop on both of them, but you still may need to give it more time, and just visit both for a while.

    If you have a family, which church do your wife and kids like best. Which one has the best childrens programs? I know you are the head of the household, but this may be a situation where you set a side your like of the preaching/preachers for the best interest of your family.

    Which place gives you the best opportunity to serve right away and in the future?
     
  5. DeaconPhil

    DeaconPhil
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2011
    Messages:
    36
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thanks HistoryB and NCTent. I wanted to add that the pastor of ChurchB is not hard right like Ruckmanites, in fact he is closer to TR Only than KJV Only. Some missionarys he has come to preach at his church do wear the TR/KJV issue on their sleeve, but I'v found that the pastor does not harp on the TR/KJV position. They do however have it written down as a doctrine in their constitution
     
  6. DeaconPhil

    DeaconPhil
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2011
    Messages:
    36
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thanks Thousand for your input.

    It's kind of a long story and I don't want to bore you. To answer your questions briefly: I am married, but have no children. My wife is leaning toward ChurchB (pretty heavily) and I was leaning toward ChurchA until I found out the pastor's position on Baptism and church discipline, which quite frankly annoys me. We visted ChurchB first for about a year and we've been visting ChurchA for about 3 months. We could jump into ministry right away at both churches, although ChurchB may wait a little longer. Obviously there is more to the story, but I just wanted to get peoples' opinions on the two churches. Thanks.
     
  7. J.D.

    J.D.
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2006
    Messages:
    3,553
    Likes Received:
    8
    If I absolutely had to choose one, it would be B, IF the pastor really loves the Bible and not just his own opinions about it. And I would make sure that preacher knows who my Lord is - Jesus, not the preacher.
     
  8. historyb

    historyb
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2009
    Messages:
    407
    Likes Received:
    0
    Your welcome. As soon as I read your post part of a verse zoomed to my mind, I am paraphrasing here - the greatest is love. That is what jumped out at me, one can be all bible person and stuff but without love it's worthless.

    Church B seems like a thing to get away from
     
  9. menageriekeeper

    menageriekeeper
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    Feb 20, 2004
    Messages:
    7,152
    Likes Received:
    0
    Someone considers Bob Jones to be liberal???

    Wow.

    I attend church A (or rather one that fits the description except for the band lol) as I have no problem with the so-called "lack of church discipline" as an official event in the church and much prefer a mentoring solution where more mature Christians work with those who have problems and much appreciate that no one's dirty laundry gets aired in public and put up for others to gossip about. Our church has found in most cases, those with open and continuous sin will either straigten up or leave in the face of good Biblical teaching practiced in front of them.

    The real choice you have here is which church fits you and your family better? Is your wife going be shunned in church B because she dares to wear a pair of pants? Is your decision to allow your wife to wear pants part of the reason you can't make connections in the church? Some churches that have unbreakable standards of this sort can be very judgemental even to new comers who may have no clue. (btdt have the tshirt)

    If your family doesn't hold to these standards away from church it will cause problems with your relationship in the church. I've been there too. A church where you aren't fully accepted because of issues of soul liberty will eventually depress your spiritual growth, especially your wife's. We women (yes I'm a woman) tend to feel the disapproval of others more deeply then men do and the constant unfriendliness of the other ladies will eventually become a huge burden and perhaps a stumbling block to your wife. Women need good relationships with other likeminded women to grow in their faith.

    The KJVO thing is a biggy for me as well. Preferred would be okay, but only doesn't get it. If God can't preseve His Word through translation into the language of today, how can He possibly preserve my soul?? That is a huge error.

    Music. I love music, but just the fact of hymns only wouldn't be the deciding factor in which church I choose. (though I want a church with a choir cause I would want to be a part of it)

    You don't have children now, but what about in the future? Is church B going to be a good fit with your child raising ideas/beliefs? Here again, are you going to face the disapproval of your fellow church members because you allow your children to watch Disney channel (I am NOT kidding) or because you don't spank or because you have a child with adhd that can't sit perfectly still in church?

    For that matter, will church A look down on your wanting to keep your children in "big" church with you rather than going to children's church? (not kidding about this either! I quit visiting with one church because the second time I attended they very pointedly showed me where the nursury was as I walked in the door)

    Anyhow, just a few thoughts.
     
  10. StefanM

    StefanM
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2004
    Messages:
    6,430
    Likes Received:
    72
    Church A, without a doubt.

    I just don't trust a preacher (or a church) that is KJVO.
     
  11. Alive in Christ

    Alive in Christ
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2008
    Messages:
    3,822
    Likes Received:
    0
    No contest.

    I would pick church A

    For the same reasons others posted.

    Much worse negative issues in church B
     
  12. matt wade

    matt wade
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2009
    Messages:
    6,156
    Likes Received:
    76
    Chalk one up for Church B.
     
  13. Gabriel Elijah

    Gabriel Elijah
    Expand Collapse
    Member

    Joined:
    Nov 30, 2010
    Messages:
    407
    Likes Received:
    0
    If I had to choose—It would be “A”—but #6 is a lil problematic for me. As for church “B”--#5 is very appealing! But I’d have to ask-- if #5 is true--- then why is #4 & KJV-only really part of the equation?
     
  14. Paul3144

    Paul3144
    Expand Collapse
    Active Member

    Joined:
    May 29, 2009
    Messages:
    2,378
    Likes Received:
    0
    I'd go with church A. It has far fewer problems than church B. Church A also has the better music program, which is important to me. I'm blessed to be a member of a top-notch church choir.
     
  15. Salty

    Salty
    Expand Collapse
    20,000 Posts Club
    Moderator

    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2003
    Messages:
    22,131
    Likes Received:
    221
    I might consider option "C"!

    Start a Bible Study with the vision of a new church- possibility of a mixture of the two churches. You state that church A is SBC - depending on the size of the town, sit down with Pastor A and possibly the DOM to consider a church plant.

    But I am concerned that you visted church A for a year and never joined?
     
    #15 Salty, Mar 24, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 24, 2011
  16. Martin Marprelate

    Martin Marprelate
    Expand Collapse
    Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 18, 2010
    Messages:
    2,505
    Likes Received:
    454
    Neither.
    A church without church discipline is not a church. Therefore Church A is a non-starter.
    I could bear the KJV at church B, if it was not a form of Ruckmanism, and I can forgive Ministers a lot if they will preach the truth to me, but legalism is just another name for 'salvation by works.'

    If absolutely forced to choose, Church B is better

    Steve
     
  17. freeatlast

    freeatlast
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2004
    Messages:
    10,295
    Likes Received:
    0
    Neither! Both are contradictions. In the first one it is stated that the pastor is biblically accurate and then you say he does not believe in church discipline. That means he is not biblically accurate.
    In the second one you say the pastor the best preacher teacher one has ever heard but he is legalistic.
    In both scenarios the contradictions cancel the statements out. I would not join either one. I might attend one or the other for a period of time and hope to help some of the members see the truth, and perhaps draw some out to another church or at least get the to see they needed to find another Pastor, but membership would not be a consideration.
     
    #17 freeatlast, Mar 24, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 24, 2011
  18. North Carolina Tentmaker

    North Carolina Tentmaker
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2003
    Messages:
    2,355
    Likes Received:
    0
    You know guys it is easy to lay out the pros and cons and talk about our individual experience and likes, but there is more at stake here. Phil you really need to make this a matter of prayer. Despite both churches faults I could see God leading to either one. You have to find his will and follow it.

    My prayer for you Phil is that God will make his will clear and give you peace with your decision.
     
  19. DeaconPhil

    DeaconPhil
    Expand Collapse
    New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2011
    Messages:
    36
    Likes Received:
    0
    Salty, I have considered starting a Bible Study and trying to start a new church, but one, I am not called to be a pastor and two, I want to make sure I've tried all my options first. A church plant is a last resort.

    NC Tent, Thanks for your prayers!

    Matt, I'm just curious why you would pick ChurchB, is it because of point #5?

    Everyone, thanks for your respones! It's been an enlightening exercise for me.

    -Phil
     
  20. annsni

    annsni
    Expand Collapse
    Administrator
    Administrator

    Joined:
    May 30, 2006
    Messages:
    20,198
    Likes Received:
    376
    Agreed. I would attend church A, pray for the pastor to fully study the Scriptures and be convicted on point #5 and to become a deeper preacher. But honestly, I can get very deep preaching from many other sources but a church that is a family, loving and seeking the Lord is the most important for me. I do not want a church that is KJVO because there is a deeper issue that carries into other areas of their beliefs and teaching that I cannot deal with.
     

Share This Page

Loading...