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Discussion in '2003 Archive' started by Salty, Nov 26, 2003.
if you believe you are supposed to take a covered dish to Heaven with you!
You can sing every verse to 'Just As I Am' without even looking at the hymnal.
you are posting in this forum.
You waste all your yearly annual leave
on RAIN DAYS just to avoid getting sprinkled
If Lottie Moon is a name used a lot in your church this time of the year.
If thought Lottie was a member of my church
You must be a Baptist if you try to figure out what you can use as a substitute for 'wine' in gormet recipes!
If your Bible is red but not read.
If you know the difference between a demon and a deacon (if you resist the devil, he will flee, if you resist a deacon, he'll cut your throat).
You must be a Baptist if you are on the committee to form a committee to study a committee on committees.
You must be a Baptist if there is a fight for the back row of pews.
You must be a Baptist if you disagree with the person on your right AND left on the pew. And one of them is your wife
You must be a Baptist... if you constantly have chicken grease on your hands!?!
You must be a Baptist if your church draws a "crowd" rather than a congregation.
Five out of four members of your congegration
have major problems with fractions
You must be a Baptist if you believe that you cannot do things differently, because it has never been done this way before....
You must be a Baptist if the phrase "the church I used to go to" often comes up in conversation
...if you are never wrong, it is just that sometimes you are less right than you thought you were.
...when you yell "amen" at a Town Meeting
...when you call the mailman "Brother" and you don't even know him!
...When you hug several ladies and your wife does not even mind