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Wedding Ceremonies

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by ShagNappy, Aug 11, 2014.

  1. ShagNappy

    ShagNappy Member

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    Folks authorized to marry... Would you marry two unbelievers in your church? Allow them to be married in your church? Why or why not?

    Heterosexual couple for clarification.

    A professor stated in a lecture today that he would happily marry two unbelievers as it would give him a chance to witness to them. He also stated he would not marry a believer to an unbeliever. He said, and I agree, there is scriptural support for not marrying a believer to an unbeliever. Makes me wonder about 2 unbelievers. Is that a slippery slope? If you can marry 2 lost folks why not all lost folks of varying "flavors?"

    Please don't turn this into a political debate. This is purely about how churches are managed and what ramifications that might have in today's world.
     
  2. preachinjesus

    preachinjesus Well-Known Member
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    Part of my requirements for me to marry a couple is that they participate, together, in premarital counseling. We currently offer a course that meets several times a year where they can be part of one of those. The course has about six sessions and then we provide follow up for individual connection with couples. At multiple points they hear the Gospel presented plain and clear. Frankly, since the act of marriage itself is a testimony of the Gospel the connections aren't hard to come by.

    I'm happy to marry folks who desire to have a pastor as part of their service. I make clear that one of my patterns in the ceremony is to describe how marriage is an act of glory to God because it is the testimony of God's work among His people.

    If folks are Christians or not, I'm happy to provide a distinctively Christian ceremony for them. They're gonna get married with some kind of officiate, I just hope to provide the distinct voice of the Gospel in a moment, one of the rare moments, when people are actually listening.

    To have a ceremony at our chapel, where our church first met, we do not require church membership but do require participation in an approved premarital course and that the officiate be a Christian minister. We do not allow same-sex couples to be married, nor would I ever consent to participate in, attend, or officiate their service.

    This is a good question. :)
     
  3. corndogggy

    corndogggy Active Member
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    Why on earth would two admitted unbelievers even want to be married in a church? Makes no sense, just go to the courthouse.
     
  4. Rolfe

    Rolfe Well-Known Member
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    Tradition, for one...
     
  5. Salty

    Salty 20,000 Posts Club
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    I think PIJ had an excellent response.
     
  6. Zaac

    Zaac Well-Known Member

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    I personally don't do it or wouldn't do it. I've had several people ask me to officiate over their service that they've wanted to hold at our church and I've had to politely decline.

    I take marriage seriously and simply cannot officiate over a ceremony that isn't joining TWO people in covenant with Christ.
     
  7. righteousdude2

    righteousdude2 Well-Known Member
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    I've not had that problem, yet!

    In my years of serving as a pastor, I've never had two unbelievers come to me and ask to be married in my church. I did turn down the use of our church for a wedding, way back when, because they wanted to use the rec hall for the after wedding events, and they were planning to serve alcohol!

    I have married unbelievers, but both times the ceremony was held outside. One time in the apple orchards of Oak Glen, CA. The gal was an adult student in a college Psych Teck class I taught, and she was in end stage cancer, and wanted to marry here high school sweetheart.

    She passed away three years later.

    The other was between two colleagues I worked with. One was a DSS investigator, and she married her long time CHP boyfriend! Because they loved riding horses, they held in an area where old television westerns [Roy Rogers, Lone Ranger] were filmed. It was a small frontier town, movie set, and it took place in the street in front of the gambling hall across from the hotel. To make it even more interesting, the bride's father and a group of CHP friends, hog tied the groom and brought him to me, on horseback, and they acted out an old fashioned shotgun wedding!

    It was well choreographed, filmed, and a blast! The groom died last year, but they had more than 25 years of wedded bliss!

    I used both of these weddings to emphasize the Christian values of marriage, and both cuples loved the ceremony because it was full of Scripture and prayers!
     
  8. Revmitchell

    Revmitchell Well-Known Member
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    They do that because they are looking for the ceremony of it all to enhance the moment for them. In fact the more religious the better for many even though they themselves are not believers.
     
  9. pinoybaptist

    pinoybaptist Active Member
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    I won't, all due respects to those of opposite opinion.
    I won't marry two unbelievers, in church or out of it, because I won't be a party to taking the Lord's Name in vain when they, down the road, split up for one reason or another, IF they remain unbelievers, here in time.
     
  10. righteousdude2

    righteousdude2 Well-Known Member
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    Piny ....

    .... I honestly respect that decision!
     
  11. ShagNappy

    ShagNappy Member

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    Interesting. I take it from the responses their is no scriptural basis either for or against outside of believing marriage is a God ordained institution between a man and a woman? It is definitely a thought provoker.
     
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