Divorce and Remarriage

Except, the adulterer would be stoned to death if we still lived under Mosaic law. The innocent party would be widowed. I mentioned this before, but it was overlooked by everyone here, except one.

Haven't read through this whole thread, but I don't understand how these verses can be ignored by those who say any remarriage is wrong.

Matt.5
[32] But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

Matt.19
[9] And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.

[10] His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry.

1Cor.7
[14] For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.

[15] But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.

It is interesting, if not amusing, how a person can be so dogmatic about some things until it hits home. When one becomes the "victim" of an adulterous mate, when one's heart is demolished from seeing one's life partner in an intimate embrace with another, when a member of one's family becomes the innocent party of a mate who ran away with a new "lust," when the counselor becomes the counselee, perspective does change. For all those who are so sure it can never happen to you and you would never marry again, beware.

Unfaithfulness can and does happen even to those who think they have a rock solid marriage. The one being cheated on is sometimes the last to know. The one so full of pride thinking..."I would never...." usually eats those words somewhere down the line.

 

Sheeagle911, you need to read the whole thread. Those verses were answered. They were not ignored.

 

You are right about that. Years ago I said I would never get married at all! That was before I met Jesus.

You are right, that is a blessing that your family has not had much divorce. I read somewhere that in the early ninteen hundreds there were only a few divorces each year. Now, the Church has just as many as in the world. Something is wrong.

HCL

 

I suspect you are making fun. However, Jehovah divorced unfaithful Israel. He will bring her back though.

Christ is betrothed to the Church.

Israel is a harlot of sort. The Church is pure and unspotted. They are not the same group.

The Father has concentrated on the wedding of his Son to provoke Israel back (which will happen at the end).

The marriage of a man and woman is to portray the marriage of Christ and his church, not God and Israel. Christ can never be severed from the church. Neither can...

 

Hello Everyone! I've been lurking for quite a while and taking everything in. I don't want to get into any arguments at all, but just had a question. Why would divorce and remarriage be allowed in the OT, sometimes for very frivolous things, and then not allowed for any reason at all in the NT? I thought that Jesus did not come to do away with the law?

Yes, I am a divorced lady. I stayed married to an abusive man, even when he asked for a divorce day after day. I knew that he was going to kill me or I'd end up having a heart attack, so I finally gave him what he wanted. I know that I can stand before the Lord one day and know that I did all I could to be the godly wife I could be. I wasn't perfect, but did my very best. My ex has nothing to do with our 3 little girls and never was a father to them. My girls crave a father's love with all their hearts. I have always had such an intense loneliness, even while married. I struggle so financially. Here at Christmas, it is really hard to see other families together. Why would it be wrong for me to be remarried...why should I suffer (more) for his sin?

I used to have the firm belief, even in the midst of such abuse and turmoil, that I had no right to divorce and remarry. I had the conviction that one just had to be separate and pray and wait, for years, if necessary, for him to change. My heart changed when it kept getting worse. There is nothing like it happening to you to change your heart.

I read all the debates on headcoverings and modest dress too. Is this along the same lines as those...some will have different opinions and convictions?

PTW- I know that you are not trying to be harsh and that you are standing up for your convictions. I respect you all. I'm really enjoying all the verses, discussions and questions.

 

Actually I am quite serious. I don't think the fact that the Bible says that God divorced Isreal is meaningless

Yes the first wife of a marriage and the second wife a marriage are not the same person either. Isreal is a harlot of sorts, yes. In the text we see that. Isreal was divorced because of her adultery.

Then we read in the New Testament that we are the Bride of Christ.

We can divorce an adulterer and remarry without it being sin.

~Lorelei

 

hsmom3, I really don't want to even respond to this. My mom and her children that are still home (my brothers and sisters) are going through a VERY similar experience.

You have read the verses apparently about divorce and remarriage according to Jesus.

This might sound dry, but it is meant with love and care. I have spent many painful hours over other people's divorces.

1. Divorce was not mentioned prior to the Mosaic Law. The Mosaic Law was to govern the whole nation. This would include the unregenerate. Remember though that Jesus said it was only for those with a hard heart. This slapped the face of the Pharisees and their interpretation.

2. Remember the story of the unjust servant who was forgiven so much yet would not forgive a little? If a person is saved, Christ has forgiven an innumerable debt. Why should a believer be allowed to not forgive a little thing (in comparison).

3. As far as your original belief, you are correct. Theology must dictate our daily walk. The sure path to lasting joy is obedience.

4. The call to salvation is a call to suffer:

Matthew 16:24
If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me.

1 Peter 3:14
But even if you should suffer for righteousness' sake, you are blessed.

Matthew 5:44
But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you.

 

God is going to bring Israel back and fulfill his covenant with her (Rom. 11).

It actually has nothing to do with divorce and remarrying another person.

In Jeremiah, God is said to have been married to Israel and Judah, two sisters at the same time. Are we now going to try and prove that bigomy is acceptable?

 

A question to some of you who are divorced from abusive or adulterous husbands....what was it like when you chose to marry,was he an unbeliever and you knew that info going into the marriage,or was he great and godly and you had no idea how he would change? What happened? Do you think he was an unbeliever and you just didn't know?

There are so many who say their husband was not coming home,having affairs,drinking and being abusive....was this the consequences of marrying an unbeliever,or do you feel he became evil after the marriage had aleady been in place?

Maybe this should be another topic. I've just been thinking about this all day.

[ December 05, 2002, 06:02 PM: Message edited by: Molly ]

 

hsmom3,

From someone who was married to an abusive husband for 14 years I can relate to you. I also stayed married because I was taught that divorce was wrong for any reason. I finally divorced my husband anyway, and finally got free from it all. He technically filed, but I wanted the divorce and not him. I felt a lot of guilt for all of this. It wasn't until the last few years that I finally began getting some peace from the Lord about it all.

We are free from the law. Christ came to pay for our sin (singular) once for all. Now we have in Him a new life and our goal now is to grow in His grace. The Bible says when we are in Christ we are new creatures, we are identified as Children of God. This doesn't change each time you sin, it stays the same.

Christ came to free us from the law. Paul said that all things are lawful but not all things are expedient. As we grow in grace we learn what things are expedient and which are not. None of what we do is going to be counted against us on judgement day, for Christ's blood is covering it all. Yes, he even covers any sin that came from divorce and remarriage! Our works may be put through the fire, but our salvation is assured. Not even divorce or remarriage can keep you from getting it if you are in Christ.

Rest in the comfort of God's love, grow in his grace, read his Word daily to help strengthen your knowledge of who this wonderful saviour is!

If you ever need someone to talk to feel free to PM me and I will give you my email address

~Lorelei

 

I beg to differ, Christ must dictate our daily walk and the sure path to lasting joy is abiding in Him and Him alone. We can't be obedient, we must let the Spirit live in us and work through us, that is obedience.

We can try all day long to be obedient, even Paul fretted over how he did what he didn't want to do and vise a versa.

This is our problem, we are so busy focusing on what we should and should not do we loose focus of Christ who we are supposed to be doing it for.

No, I am not saying we should be disobedient, I am just saying that WE can't do it, Christ has to do it through us.

~Lorelei

 

Molly,

I was an unbeliver of 16 years of age when I married my first husband. He also was an unbeliever. We both got saved (or supposedly so) when we were married. We actually had a few good years where we both were active in church. Then we moved, he returned to drinking, we both left church and the abuse started again. This time I wasn't so young and I knew that I didn't have to take this.

PTW,

When you say that salvation is a call to suffer, do you think being in an abusive marriage is really suffering for righteousness sake?

Jesus also said that he came so that our joy might be full. Suffering for Christ and suffering because a person thinks its fun to hit you are two separate things.

~Lorelei

 

PTW,

I realize it was not about an actual divorce or remarriage, but I do think it is significant. Even in an illustration, would God want it to appear that He would do something sinful? If divorce is a sin, no matter what, why would God's word say he divorced Isreal? That would be comparing his action to a sin.

~Lorelei

 

hsmom3,

Your post brought tears to my eyes. Loneliness is a terrible thing, but remember Jesus is always with you to comfort and guide you.

Perhaps as you walk in God's Will, He will send a man who can be a wonderful husband and father to your children.

 

Thank you for acklowleging that. That alone makes what I had to endure worth it.

 

What do either of these comments have to do with the topic....and why did you address them to me?

 

i'm new to this here board and this is the first thread i have read.

everybody is entitled to their opinion, free country and all.

you can mention all the books about marriage and divorce you want. but the one that is clear to me is the WORD OF GOD. it's very clear about divorce.


oh, btw, for what it's worth, i'm from georgia and proud of it.

[ December 06, 2002, 12:37 AM: Message edited by: JCLWRB ]

 

Please tell me how you know Christ apart from what is written in this word. Btw, Theology in its technical sense is the study of God. For Christians, we can move past who he is (we already know) and can learn what he says. This is exactly what I have tried to do in this thread. I have carefully laid out what Christ has said and gave the interpretation of it.

 

He did it under the covenant of the Law. Remember though that he will bring Israel back to himself. You could say that he divorced her to focus on his son's marriage and would later remarry his wife.

Even Paul said that if divorce must happen, remain single or be reconciled. God the Father will reconcile.

 

Do you believe in an "innocent" party?