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Terms of Endearment

Discussion in '2003 Archive' started by Gina B, Jul 9, 2003.

  1. BrianT

    BrianT New Member

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    I am, in the way that you support it. Not against the Biblical way. </font>[/QUOTE]I support it in the non-Biblical way? You're the second person from this board this week to claim that. I challenged the other person to provide a quote of where I supported it. She couldn't, and neither did she apologize. Can you do either?

    Anyway, if it's literally not good for a man not to touch a woman, somebody better quickly tell my wife before she goes to the dentist! ;)
     
  2. Thankful

    Thankful <img src=/BettyE.gif>

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    I am secure enough in my marriage to not be concerned about my husband hugging a woman at church who may need comforting.

    I don't think it would bother him if I hugged a man that needed comforting. There are some teenage boys in our church that give hugs to some of us "Grandmas"

    If one is going to follow the Bible literally, then one should greet all Christians with a kiss.
     
  3. Thankful

    Thankful <img src=/BettyE.gif>

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    I think Brian T that you just quoted scriptures.

    Not sure how anyone would get the impression that you support unBiblical Kissing.
     
  4. Headcoveredlady

    Headcoveredlady New Member

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    BrianT,
    You gave the impression to me that you support homosexual behavior. If you do not support that I am sorry.
     
  5. BrianT

    BrianT New Member

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    No prob, and thanks. [​IMG] I don't support the behaviour, I just think we should love them anyway. [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
  6. timothy 1769

    timothy 1769 New Member

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    i call women either mrs. or miss X, or their first name, if this is their expressed or implied wish (often based on how they introduce themselves to me). this is rather compromised online, where i have no idea what people's last names are, so i just use their handles.

    i feel it is inappropriate for men and women to touch who aren't pretty closely related or married, but i've always shaken hands when offered.

    i've never taken "not to touch a woman" literally, but it's definitely something to think about, and something i'm
    practically doing now anyway.
     
  7. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Timothy, may I ask if you're a guy? We have some ladies who use Biblical names (such as Timothy) and it's hard to know! Answer ONLY if you want to!

    And please call me Diane even tho I'm sure I'm much older than you. I graduated High School in 1969.

    BrianT. Well said. I love the sinner and hate the sin for what it steals from their lives. (Not meaning homosexuals here but all sin in all our lives!)

    Diane
     
  8. blackbird

    blackbird Active Member

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    I practice and teach--scenerio:man approaches woman--other than his wife or daughter--an extended hand for a handshake. No hugging--sometimes it'll slip up on ya--but when it does, try to let it be the last time.

    And no, I don't have a problem with women!! Its just that the devil is deceptive and cleaver and can use "closeness" as a tool to his advantage.

    Brother David
     
  9. blackbird

    blackbird Active Member

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    And the heart is deceitful--look over in Jeremiah 17: 9, "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?"

    Our own hearts will tell us one thing and the Holy Spirit another--so if I say "I know my heart" we really don't do we?

    Blackbird
     
  10. MaryKay

    MaryKay New Member

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    We hug a lot at my church. We are brother's and sister's in the Lord. I consider them as such, I do love them as my brother and sister..nothing more. MK [​IMG]
     
  11. timothy 1769

    timothy 1769 New Member

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    Diane,

    yes i'm a guy, born in 1969, but saved 1 1/2 years ago.
     
  12. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Thanks Timothy! I felt like you were a man but didn't want to just assume!

    Diane [​IMG]
     
  13. Headcoveredlady

    Headcoveredlady New Member

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    Amen!
     
  14. Dina

    Dina New Member

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    &gt;&gt;I am secure enough in my marriage to not be concerned about my husband hugging a woman at church who may need comforting.
    I don't think it would bother him if I hugged a man that needed comforting.&lt;&lt;

    I agree. I have many friends that are males that I had since I was 12? that I see rarely, but when I do see them we hug.

    Same goes for the female friends that my dh had while in high school and the Marine Corp. He has some "Corp buddies" that are female and when they see each other, which is rare, they hug.
    I see nothing wrong with it. It is a form of repect, caring, and friendly love. I guess I think of it as "Love thy neighbor as thyself" and "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you"
     
  15. ByGrace3

    ByGrace3 New Member

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    We have a friend who took this to an extreme. He was riding in a car with a couple. The husband was driving, the wife was in the front passenger seat, and our friend was in the back seat. The wife was eating a piece of candy or something, and started to choke. Our friend was afraid to help her by beating her on the back or the Heimlich maneuver (sp?) because the Bible says for a man not to touch a woman. He was completely sincere and couldn't figure out what to do. The husband stopped the car and helped his wife, and everything was ok. But this was taking it to an extreme!

    My husband and I don't hug others outside our family of the opposite sex. We have that standard for ourselves simply to keep from giving any occasion the enemy (Satan) to use to hurt our testimonies or to introduce a temptation. But even in this, we aren't extreme. There is an elderly lady in our church who hugs my husband, and we had a dear friend who was sick with cancer whom I would hug when I saw him - he was older than my dad. When we leave for Canada, I imagine we'll hug and be hugged by folks that we wouldn't normally hug. We love our church family, but we just don't do the hugging thing with the opposite sex!

    Susan
     
  16. mozier

    mozier New Member

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    I feel it all comes down to who says it to whom and how it is said.

    Two people come to my mind. First, there is this really nice older southern lady who works as a waitress at one of my favorite restaurants. With her, it is always, "Hi, Hon!" or "Good Morning, Sugar!" complete with her twangy accent. Coming from her, it is all right.

    The second person is a girl I knew a few years back. Barbara was a classmate in a few of my undergraduate classes, and she was absolutely stunning to look at. She also worked at Hooters :rolleyes: But anyway, she was always saying, "Hi, Handsome!" to me, or "Hey, Good Looking!" Now even though I am happily married and all, I couldn't help but be "floored" by these comments and have certain temptations enter my thoughts. Though she was surely just being friendly and mildly flirtacious, I still found that her words had a significant impact on me as a man. In the end, I felt that her words were inappropriate, and so I ended up trying not to be near her whenever I could.

    So yes, these words can have an impact on an individual. It just depends on the circumstance, and perhaps should be avoided all together.


    mozier
     
  17. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    And you know, there are different types of hugs! I don't hug other people the way I hug my husband! There's a man in our Sunday School class who hugs me the minute I arrive. It's more of a arm over my shoulder side to side type thing. There is no real 'bodily' contact. Now I hug my friends in another way, too. And the little children will ask to kiss me or will just jump into my arms.

    I also tell these people I love them. I sometimes wonder if we're too careful because of all the adultery and lawsuits. Jesus said 'Suffer the little children to come unto me...' but we 'might get sued' if a child were found sitting in our laps today. [​IMG]

    Diane
     
  18. ByGrace3

    ByGrace3 New Member

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    Oh, I know what you mean there, Diane! It's a very sad world that we live in, when we can't set a child on our laps in Sunday school and tell them we love them. Our church has several bus routes, and our workers have to be constantly on guard about how they touch the children. A nursery worker can't be alone with a child. A teacher can't be alone with a child. It's not even a good idea for a man or teenage boy to work in a class of small children or the nursery.

    Susan
    who's crying with you [​IMG]
     
  19. Headcoveredlady

    Headcoveredlady New Member

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    Yes, it is sad but we don't want another molesting to happen, EVER. For those who have had that happen to them it is one of the worst things that can happen to a person.
     
  20. dianetavegia

    dianetavegia Guest

    Common Jewish teaching in Jesus' time was that a man must be careful not to even touch a woman's hand by accident.

    By David Smith: I know a woman who is a little invisible.

    Though beautiful in appearance, you would have to look for her to find her in a crowd. She just has a way of melting into the background of things. She never draws attention to herself; there is nothing showy about her. She speaks little, and only in soft tones when she does. Why, even as I think about her, it occurs to me she even walks quietly!

    But don't mistake her quiet for lack of activity! She is anything but lazy; she is the epitome of a humble servant. She can easily outwork her whole family combined -- and typically does. Seemingly tireless and forever industrious, if she isn't working, you immediately presume she must be home in bed sick. But, if she is "laid up sick," I believe people check on her.

    In the time and society of Jesus of Jesus' day, women in general -- not just women like my "invisible" servant friend -- were expected to be hard-working and servant-minded. Just try to read Proverbs 31 without coming away with that impression. Up before light (vs.15) she is at
    work all day and is still quite busy after sunset has come (vs.18ff).

    In that century and culture, public contact between men and women was strictly limited, as well. Common Jewish teaching in Jesus' time was
    that a man must be careful not to even touch a woman's hand by accident. Why, you would think that women were supposed to be invisible.

    Jesus stepped into this world of the invisible. And wherever Jesus stepped, Jesus saw the invisible, the forgotten, and the neglected. Jesus saw someone who would have been more than just a little invisible to most.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    HE could have just spoken the word and she would have been healed but Jesus stepped outside of Jewish 'law' to touch one who needed to be touched and I do the same.

    [​IMG] Diane
     
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