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Dating

Discussion in 'General Baptist Discussions' started by freeatlast, Jan 24, 2011.

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To date or not to date non believers

Poll closed Feb 8, 2011.
  1. Yes there is nothing wrong with datng a non believer

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  2. No a Christian should not date a non believer

    35 vote(s)
    97.2%
  3. It depends on the non believer

    1 vote(s)
    2.8%
  4. Other

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  1. JohnDeereFan

    JohnDeereFan Well-Known Member
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    One of the sad lessons I've learned over the past few days here is that just because someone says they're a Christian doesn't mean they honor God's Word.

    There is no Bible verse that says once you hit a magic age (in this case, eighteen), you're no longer accountable to your parents. But in our society, the rule is that you turn eighteen, you move out, go to college, join the military and **BINGO!** you're not accountable to anybody.

    We don't apply that to any other area of life. We don't say, "Hey, I'm eighteen. You can't make me come in to work today." "Hey, professor, I'm eighteen. You can't make me do this assignment." "Hey, Sargeant, I'm eighteen. I don't have to accept this duty assignment."

    And yet, the moment the last candle is out on the cake, the eighteen year old is on their own.

    Where is that in the Bible?

    Sadly, so many Christians have been shaped by the world, rather than shaping the world by exercising Biblical principles.
     
  2. mets65

    mets65 New Member

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    Just because I turned 18 my parents didn't stop raising me.
     
  3. jaigner

    jaigner Active Member

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    I'm not saying parents automatically stop being parents at 18. That certainly wasn't the case for me. It was a gradual process. But I believe by that age, parents should have trained their children how to make good decisions for themselves. There is still influence, but it should become less and less until the child can provide for themselves.

    But I reject the idea that daughters are under a father's authority until they are married. Marriage is not for everyone, and, if marriage happens, it has to be the child's decision. Mom and Dad don't get automatic veto power (but, ideally, the relationship is still such in that there is respect for the parents' view).

    Plus, daughters (and sons) are as much under Mom's authority as Dad's. When I married my wife, I asked both of her parents, not that it was their decision to release her or something. This was a woman who had lived all around the world on her own. But they are two people I greatly respect and greatly desired their support.

    I also discussed the idea with my parents out of respect, but it was, and all parties agreed, not their decision to make.
     
  4. righteousdude2

    righteousdude2 Well-Known Member
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    I Said "No", but, I DID Opposite...

    ... I know, shame on me, but, when I met my wife (of 32 years in May) I was in a deep prodigal daze, and didn't really wasn't looking for a believer!

    Of course, as the Lord always does in our life, after we were married, the Lord started to work on my heart, leading me to take her to a Teen Challenge concert (with Mike Warnke) in Omaha. The Lord is great, and still on the throne, and she accepted the Lord at that concert.

    This allowed me to slowly find my way home, and for her to grow along with me.

    God knows what He is doing, HOWEVER, I'd never tell a believer to do what I did. It is wrong, and it doesn't always work out like it did in my life!
     
  5. menageriekeeper

    menageriekeeper Active Member

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    LOL, John. Can't mock you for what we do too! :laugh:

    We had the eldest daughter's boyfriend convinced that we had them followed on one of their first dates. We hadn't really, we just know people. Lots and lots of people lol!

    Freeatlast describes our dating process well. Visit here first. Get to know the parents (if a kid doesn't want me meeting their parents that is a huge red flag), visit there, go with us here or there and then if we like the kid and think we can trust him/her, he/she gets warned "don't even try anything. I know half the town and I'm related to the other half. I'll know what you've been doing before you ever make it back". My child gets warned that I'd better be able to contact them whenever I get the whim or we'll come looking for them.

    So far, so good! (but the boys aren't dating yet, so we'll see. might have to make some adjustments)
     
  6. calvin

    calvin New Member

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    what does light have to do with darkness? or Christ with belial. how do you know oh husband, that you shall convert your wife? how do you know oh wife, that you shall convert your husband? be ye not unequally yoked with unbelievers. i have not read alot of the post, yet, i bet they are going along these lines. its hard enough, with believers of two different denominations. how much worse than to be tied to an unbeliever. then we have to ask ourself, what kind of unbeliever. atheist? satanist? pagan? none of these would be a good choice... so no, i dont think its a good idea to date an unbeliever. i myself have chosen to be by myself, so i dont date at all. but if for some earth shaking reason i would, it would only be to a believer, and one of my own faith. Peace :thumbs:
     
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