do you ever apologize, just to keep peace?

Hey Popeye!


Sherrie

 

ME!


Nah, just kiddin'!

 

RomOne16 that was a very good post at the top of the page. A hearty Amen! Yes, pride should be repented of, and it's often at the root of being unable to appologize. Very well said.


"There is that speaketh like the piercings of a sword: but the tongue of the wise is health." Prov. 12:18

God Bless You,
Charlotte

 

WS, when I read this, I had to do a quick glance at your location; my pastor gave this exact sermon (Nine words that will save a Marriage, or something close to that), a few weeks ago, so I wondered if you were an anon. member of my church. Soon's I saw your 10-20, I knew that I knew that but the quote just sorta caught me off guard!!

 

Sorry Guys, I would consider that lying! IF my husband were to apologize in that manner, just to keep peace, it would mean nothing to me. I'd rather he speak his piece, share his side of the situation and us go on from there. It must be working.... we've been married 33 years this fall.

Diane

 

Apologies are not always about saying I am sorry. They are about being a humble servant, and loving the other person more than yourself.

What is so hard about wanting to have peace with your brothern, sister, or your husband or your wife. Why is it more important to dwell on one thing, and hold it to your grave!

Life goes on. It is too short to not be humble. Who cares who says it first. If I waited the problem out with my own late husband...I would have been too late, because he died without any warning. Click! He was gone to me forever. I thank God, I never waited. For the rest of my life, I will always be humble and apologize. I do not ever want it to be too late.

Sometimes life is not about self. sometimes life is about serving.

Sherrie

 

When I was young and would visit my grandparents and sometimes they would argue I always observed that my grandpa would go work in the yard or the garden. On one occassion I asked him why he did this, he said he believed he was right and my grandmother believed she was right, the best thing to do was to move on to things that needed to be done, both having their say of what they think. In this way, he had learned to avoid any major arguments...I don't know how many years it took for him to learn the usefulness or develop this method...but it still works today for them. This made me to want to always respond in that way with my own wife some day, sadly, I have not developed it to the level of my grandfather But I do make an honest effort.

Bro. Dallas

 

One may say that evil does not exist for subjective man at all, that there exist only different conceptions of good. Nobody ever does anything deliberately in the interests of evil, for the sake of evil. Everybody acts in the interests of good, as he understands it. But everybody understands it in a different way. Consequently men drown, slay, and kill one another in the interests of what is good. -- Gurdjieff

 

Laurenda said:

Laurenda, that quote sounds like it came from Marianne Williamson's "A Course on Miracles"!

I strongly disagree! Evil DOES exist! His name is legion! I disagree with every word of that quote!

Respectfully,
Diane

Edited because I misspelled your name.

 

Yes I will, because most of the time when my wife and I argue, it's because I have made a major issue out of something that didn't matter in the first place. Most of the time, after cooler heads prevail, we will see that we were both partly right, and both partly wrong. So yes, I will apologize in order to keep the peace, not to say who was right or wrong, but for forcing an issue that didn't need to be forced.

 

If I apologize, and I have, if I am not wrong, I don't apologize for being wrong. I apologize for being offensive. I apologize for hurting someone. I apologize for being a butt. But never for being wrong unless I am wrong.

 

So drowning people, killing people is not evil/bad/sin? You do not believe there is any actual evil? People do things they think are right, and becasue they think it is right then it actually is right? uhh....... So I can do whatever I might dream up to do, adn becasue I do not do it with evil intentions it is not evil, nothing wrong with it?
Thats what satan would like everyone to beleive.
But God says otherwise.

 

Frogman, my father did this. He would just walk out to avoid any argument with my mother. When I married my first husband, my dad gave him the advice that it takes two to argue, so he advised him to just leave rather than argue.

This did not work for us. It would make me so angry because nothing was ever settled. We needed to communicate and perhaps agree to compromise.

Do I apologize to keep peace? I may with my husband or family member, but I usually do not do it with others.

So I think that probably my answer would be usually I do not apologize just to keep peace.

 

First, let me just say that I could be wrong, and if I am let me apologize....NAW!!! This is why I don't apologize, because there is no good place for it.

In the case of the above statement, for a different slant on the thought, consider that to a natural man the statement is correct. Perhaps, and I say that because I don't know WisdomSeekers meaning, but perhaps this is the approach her statement is taking.

If I am wrong, I am simply wrong and there is nothing I can do about that, but to apologize from the beginning, the middle, or the end just doesn't sit right with me when I have spoken what I believe to be truth. Too often people count apology as 'real' love. Real love is speaking that which is true, if we continually apologize for speaking truth, pretty soon WisdomSeeker's supplied quote becomes a reality. Christ did not apologize in John Ch. 6 as 'disciples' were departing from him, did he? Weren't his statements spoken of by himself as being offensive? Yet he did not apologize, yet at the same time he is the essence of the Love of God. I rather believe this is love, to speak truth. I happen to believe that the statement above is truth spoken with its view the carnal attitude of humanity.

Bro. Dallas Eaton

 

Christine, the person may be really, really, sorry but doesn't know how to stop doing what he/she is doing.

I don't like confrontation either, but in a marriage, things need to be discussed. When I saw my dad walk away, it seemed to me that he was always giving in to whatever my mother wanted.

He would let her have her way rather than have a disagreement. Sometimes this was not good for our family.

At 91, my mother is still like the child who wants to have her way all the time. It is difficult for us to deal with this. She doesn't use this tactic with me as much as my brothers.

 

I agree with what Laurenda posted. It's not that there is no evil, but that bad things can happen even "in the interests of what is good". Most of us do what we do for good. I would say that, of those I know on this board, we aren't deliberately malicious. Right? It's more true on a more broad scale than in our little microcosm, and we've seen it in action just recently, here and on that broader scale (collateral damage, hello?).

To apply it here, people have unnecessarily fought in the interests of being right and speaking truth. One can speak truth without fighting, and people can disagree without causing giant rifts in the community. Yet, both have happened here (and I'm sure will happen again), and no one started out with the intent to do either.

Have we become such an arrogant people that we cannot even say "I'm sorry we fought," without thinking that means we've lost?

 

Hitler thuogth he was right, and if theres no real evil, just good intentions, then Hitler was a good guy.